All I Can Really Do
by Unread-Letters
Summary: A story written from Hermione's point of view, in a notebook of her's, about a certain best friend and his brother. T for "harsh words", lanuage, and inuendos. Completed. Has a sequel called Airbrushed Memories
1. Chapter One: It's So Hard To Be A Friend

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "It's so hard to be a friend and be in love this way" is all the Descendents, not me.**

**Author's Note: This was supposed to be a short story but I decided to continue with it because I was bored and "inspiration struck". This is a story written from Hermione's perspective about a certain best friend. I hope it's clear who it is. I also made him have a girlfriend in this, Lavender. It just fit into my story better. F****or clarification quotes double spaced between speakers and actions involved in what's being said. The lines divide notebook entry's from conversations and other character interactions. **Well enjoi...

**All I Can Really Do**

  
Chapter One: It's So Hard To Be A Friend And Be In Love This Way

  
**By: UnreadLetters**

"_It's moments like these, that you wish time would stop."_

I asked him to go to quidditch practice with me yesterday. We were sitting in the stands waiting for Harry to finish. Talking and laughing like we've known each other forever, even though it's only been a few years. My smile wouldn't, couldn't go away. Looking at that twinkle in his eyes, that I love so much, or how tiny dimples appear when he smiles. All I could think about was how I could sit in those stands with him for the rest of my life. Just sitting on some stupid piece of wood, in the middle of the quidditch pitch. Talking about nothing but having it mean everything and it did. It means everything to me. _He means everything to me_. I wish I could tell him. I wish I could run up to him, in the Great Hall, throw my arms around him and tell him I love him, but I can't. I'm 16 years old and in love with my best friend. In love, what a peculiar phrase, especially when you're so young. 16 year olds aren't supposed to be in love, but I was never a normal 16 year old. And he was never a normal best friend. 

All I can really do is just sit here and obsess over him. Be a mad stalker who just happens to not stalk. It's like chasing a rainbow. It goes on forever but it's never really there, you never get to it. That's it, that's how it feels. I see him everyday. I talk to him everyday. And everyday I find myself staring at his part of the classroom, where he sits, wishing I could tell him. Wishing he loved me back. Wishing he didn't love her. But he does and I have to deal with that. I just don't want to. Especially, when he looks at me in the corridors just to smile. That fucking smile. That damned smile that makes me go weak in the knees. I can actually hear him smile sometimes. If he's talking and I'm not looking. I can hear it in his voice. It affects me that much. _He affects me that much_. And don't even get me started on the way his eyes twinkle.

Who knows, maybe one day things will change. I'm not counting on it. We'll leave Hogwarts and I'll never hear from him again. He'd only be a memory then. Oh how I wish he was only a memory. A figment of my imagination, but he isn't. No he can't make it easy. He can't go to Beauxbatons or Durmstrang. He can't live in another country. Oh no, he goes to Hogwarts and lives in England. A five minute walk up a flight of steps from me, most of the time.

They say it's better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all. Well I didn't lose my love, I just never got him. So can the rule change for me? Can I just use a time turner to pick a different school or at least a different group of friends? Unfortunately things are never that easy.

Well I'm going to finish sometime around here because my hand hurts and he's in my Charms class next. If I'm writing this while being around him my heart would start to hurt too, and I can't deal with that today. So here you have it. My jumble of words and rhetorical questions. Questions that will always be rhetorical because nothing will ever chan--

* * *

"Hullo Hermione, can I have a look at your notes?"

"No Ron, besides they're not notes."

"Not notes?!?!?!? Well what is it then? Can I read it?"

"It's nothing, nothing important."

"Well then can I--"

"And no, you can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I said so."

"Fine I'll go talk to Lavender then, seeing as she actually fancys me and all."  
_I can't help but sigh_

* * *

I love him and he'll never know, because I'll never tell him.

**--UnreadLetters**


	2. Chapter Two: My Heart Beats In Breakdown...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. Oh and "My heart beats in breakdowns" is all from Evergreen Terrace, not me.**

**Author's Note: Yeah so I know I said this was to be a short story but "inspiration struck" so I thought I'd make it longer, just not sure how long yet. I also realize how random and choppy it is, especially in my dialog but I just wanted to make it sound like teenagers talking, and well that's what me and my friends sound like, so yeah. But for clarification its double spaced between speakers and any actions involved in what's being said. I also just realized that I made them 16 but brought back Fred and George as characters; let's just pretend they still go there. Sorry that was so long. Well enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Two: My Heart Beats In Breakdowns**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I wish I could say I have no regrets but I wanted too much from you."-Bouncing Souls_

"Just go talk to him, what's the big deal?"

"No, Ron, I can't. I just get so nervous"

"Hermione he's like Buddha. Just go and--,"

_I laugh, almost violently_

"What are you laughing at?"

_I imitate him  
_"'He's like Buddha."  
"Honestly Ron. And I would be able to talk to him if certain people named Harry and Ron didn't make it awkward."

"What do you mean 'make it awkward'? It's encouragement."

"Oh, so making kissing faces and numerous obscene gestures behind his back translates into encouragement?"

"It's just a little extra push."

_I playfully punch him in the arm _

"Besides, you know we really don't mean to make you nervous, which, again why do you get so nervous? Just ask him to go with you to Hogsmeade or something."

_Oozing with sarcasm  
_"Oh, well you know he's only just your broth--"

"Oi! George! Come over here for a minute!"

"Ron, what the fuck are you--"

_George stands next to my chair, right next to my damn chair_

"Hullo Ron, Hermione. How goes it?"

_Ron gets up and enthusiastically shakes George's hand  
_"Fine, wonderful! Right Hermione?"  
_I nod, suspicious  
_"By the way it's simply smashing to see you George."  
_Ron looks at me  
_"He's a good man, good man indeed"

_George nervously chuckles, not sure how to respond to his brother's odd display  
_"Right, um..you too, Ron.Um.. Why did you call me over here?"

"Right, well Hermione here..."  
_Ron points to me, I can't help but shake slightly out of nervousness  
_"...has a question to ask you."

_Ron subtly receives an elbow in the stomach  
_"Um... uh... Oh yeah, right..George what was the Muggle Studies essay supposed to be about again?"  
_I flash Ron my best smart arse smile_

"Hmmm... Muggle Studies....I think it was something like a roll of parchment on the purposes of the television, yeah I think that was it."

"Oh great thanks so much! See you later then."

_George walks away leaving me very annoyed yet somewhat amused_

"Well Miss Granger, what exactly was that?"

"You told him I had to ask him a question so I asked him a question. I was just doing what you said Ronald."

"Yeah, but you were supposed to ask him to Hogsmeade this weekend not the purposes of a fellyvisi--"

"Tel-e-vis-ion."

_Ron, mocking me as usual  
_"Television."  
"Whatever."

"Well anyway that's not going to happen, sorry."

"What writing your essay, what are you on Hermione?"

"No, you arse, asking him to Hogsmeade."

"Hey eff you and yes it _is_ going to happen."

"So help me, Ronald Weasley, if you do anything, anything at all I will not be held responsible for my actions."

"Calm down, calm down. I'm not gonna to do anything."

_Harry sits next to Ron on the sofa  
_"Not gonna do what?"

"Oh hi Harry! How was detention?"

"Detention was detention but what's Ron not gonna do?"

"Anything pertaining to George and me."

"Then if Ron's not, then I will."

_Harry and Ron explode with laughter. I turn a brilliant shade of red._

"No you won't or you won't be the boy who lived anymore. You'll be the boy who got the shite hexed out of him by a girl."

"Fine, fine. Be that way. Ron, how about a quick game of chess before practice?"

"Alright then sounds good."

_The boys are playing their game. I'm sitting in a chair next to them. All the while Ron is continuously whispering something that sounds a lot like "George" in my general direction._

* * *

You know, it's rather ironic really. He's always giving me advice about George; all the while I'd rather have him. I mean, yeah sure, I have a crush on George, a big crush in fact but I love Ron. But I swear to God if that little wanker whispers George one more time I'm gonna murder him! Hmm I wonder where Harry's off to...

* * *

"Hermione it's Sunday, what can you possibly be writing now? You finished all your homework on Wednesday."

_I look up from her notebook_

"Actually, Tuesday. Anyway it's nothing, nothing--"

"Nothing important. Yeah I know."

"Then stop asking."

"We'll come on then."

"Where are we going?"

_Ron shakes his head  
_"Harry's quidditch practice?!?!?"

"Oooohh, right. I forgot."

_Ron and I walk towards the pitch_

"Ooooohhh! You'll get to see _George_ as well!"  
_Ron receives a nice sock in the arm for his comment  
_"Owww! Hermione that hurt, on the inside."  
_Grabs his chest in mock agony  
_"I think you broke my heart."

_I laugh very loudly, Jesus I need a new laugh_

_Ron imitates it, as usual_

"Dammit Ron! Bugger Off!"

_Walking back from practice_

"I talked to Padma the other day."

"Oh did you know? What'd she have to say?"

"She said she wanted to shag me! She told me."

_Ron smiles at his own statement with an air of teenage pride_

"Well next time you really want arse I guess you know where to go."

_Ron chuckles, why must he chuckle?  
_"Ha! Yeah I suppose..."

"Wow, I can't believe you guys went out almost 2 years ago. It seems to long."

"Yeah I know, it's amazing how time flies. You know tomorrow Lavender and I have been together for seven months."

_Ron shakes his head in disbelief. I sigh, unnoticed, thank God_

"Wow, congratulations."  
_Although not to sure I meant it_

"Are you guys gonna do anything for it?"

"Eh, I dunno. We'll see I guess...."

"Yeah."

"I think Harry's behind us, guess we'd better wait for him."

"Yeah, okay."

* * *

It's kinda funny how much he acts like my grandfather. He died sometime in my second year, and I was always very close to him. I know this probably sounds extremely thick but sometimes I see a little of him in Ron. He just acts so much like him in the things he does and says. I miss my grandfather so much and Ron doesn't help. It's so ridiculous to feel this way. It really needs to stop. But it won't.

Someone in the common room is listening to WWN. They're playing a corny love song. Ron's sitting behind my chair, on the couch like always. I can hear him singing along. I turn to glance at him and he nervously stops. He doesn't think anyone can hear him. He's trying to cover it up. I turn back around into my notebook. He's singing again, a small faint whisper, which only I can hear. I wonder if he knows that.

* * *

_I get up from my chair and stifle a yawn_

"Well, Mr. Weasley. I think I'm gonna head off to bed. When Harry gets back from the showers give him a goodnight for me."

"Will do"

_He waves_

"Goodnight, see ya bright and early!"

_His mock enthusiasm gets me every time_

_I start smiling again. Dammit!_

* * *

I almost didn't make it to my room. But now I'm here and my lip is quivering. My eyes are watering. I don't know why. But my heart beats in breakdowns.

**--UnreadLetters**


	3. Chapter Three: My, My What A Mess We've ...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "My, my what a mess we've made" is all from Alkaline Trio, not me**

**Author's Note: I think you get the gist of everything right now. I understand how random and choppy this story is and I apologize but that's how it's gonna be. I wanna thank my reviewers, your comments mean a lot to me and are very much appreciated and I also wanna thank everyone who's reading this I know it's not very good but thank you for taking a look. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Three: My, My What A Mess We've Made**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Are you the love of my lifetime cause there's been times I've had my doubts."-Bright Eyes_

How is it possible that the older boys get the more immature they become? When I first met Harry and Ron, though they were young, but both gave off this aura as if they had the weight of the world on their shoulders. Which I guess in a way they did. But ever since Voldemort was defeated they've been trying to make up for their lost childhoods, I guess.

I'm sitting in the back of Transfiguration. I had already finished the assignment, an essay on the pros and cons of being able to transform into things. So I'm just kinda pishing about. I heard laughter from across the room, and then Ron's deep voice...

* * *

"One time my mom, boyfriend and I..."  
_Wait a moment, what the fuck? Rewind.  
But then I could hear Harry_

"Oh man, read this one..."

* * *

He was gasping the words between laughs. I leaned my chair a bit and the mystery was solved. They had somehow gotten a hold of a copy of _Witch Weekly_. They must be reading the embarrassing story segments. I have a bunch of those in my room, for some odd reason Ginny gave me a subscription for my birthday once. I look over at the laughing boys again and his twinkling eyes are on me.

* * *

"I have a bunch of those if you want some."  
_My whisper is on the boarder of a small shout_

"Really, can we have a look at them, tomorrow or something?"

_Harry joins in, looking almost ecstatic  
_"Yeah can we have um?"

"Yeah sure, I don't really read them anyway."

* * *

I turn back to my notebook and I can hear the laughter slowly die. Professor McGonagall has confiscated their entertainment. The looks on their faces are rather amusing.

I'm in Muggle Studies now. George just asked a question. It's amazing how studious and intellectual he is when Fred's not around. He's really sweet as well. Right before we went back to Hogwarts he had some sort of quidditch accident, which up until today I had forgotten about. Anyway, Mrs. Weasley always takes pictures of her children before they board the train. She sent the pictures to them this morning. At the end of Muggle Studies George came up to me flashing that adorable Weasley smile and he was fidgeting a bit (he does that a lot actually, he's a lot more anxious then Fred).

* * *

"Hey, Hermione did you see the pictures yet?"  
_I shake my head  
_"Well take a look at this one."  
_I can sense the pride lacing his voice_

_He hands me the picture. It's of him and Fred, smiling and waving absolutely identical except--  
_"Oh my God! George! Look at your eye!  
_There, smiling up from the picture is an adorable George with a shiny black and purple eye. It looked like someone had taken a quill and coloured over it._

"Yeah,"  
_He chuckles  
_"The quidditch accident..."  
_He's somewhat trailing off_

"Oh man, George...that's horrible. But you know it is a really cute picture despite the eye."  
_Shite, it was a really cute picture with the eye. I have a tiny thing for guys sporting black eyes, don't ask I'm weird._

_He blushes and chuckles, fidgeting again.  
__Then Fred called him over.  
_"Well, guess I'd better go over there. See you later then Hermione."  
_And he flashes me that smile again_

* * *

There must be something in the Weasley gene pool that houses that smile. They all have it. All seven of them, even Ginny. Though, they all have their own variations. Charlie's is more jovial, Bill's is more mysterious, Percy's show's flecks of pride and pompousness, Fred's is mischievous, George's is mischievous as well but has an underlying sincerity that Fred's doesn't have. Ginny's is sweet and gentle and Ron's? Well Ron's is sheepish, like Ron. Oh, and you know of course all their eyes twinkle, all seven pairs of eyes.

I tell you it's torture going to the Burrow on holidays, especially when you happen to be obsessed with quidditch playing, eye twinkling, smiling, red-haired boys. Damn Weasleys.

There I go getting all off subject again. I do that a lot don't I? It's rather hard to stay on track though when one is in love with her best friend and just happens to be severely attracted to his brother. Dammit here come the bastards.

* * *

"Hey Hermione, you got to lunch fast."  
_Damn Harry for being so damn chipper_

"Oh hey Harry, Fred, Ron, George!"  
_I gulp, hard with the last two_

_They all sit down at the table. Ron and George across from me, of course. Harry and Fred next to me. Then they begin whoring-up _() _whatever they've managed to put on their plates. I'm not hungry, so my mind starts to wander. It wanders right in front of me._

* * *

Is it wrong to have a sudden urge to jump your best friend or your best friend's brother? Because I have that sudden urge right about now and it's scaring me. Damn hormones. I've been damning a lot of stuff today. Yep can't stop thinking now. Oh the things I could do to those boys. Ew! Hermione get a grip. It's Ron and George. Just Ron and George. You won't do anything to them. You shouldn't even be thinking it. And yet I am.

* * *

_A hand snaps in front of me  
_"Hermione, Hermione, HERMIONE!"  
_It's Harry  
_"Are you okay?"  
_I look up out of my daze; they're looking at me both of them. And just a hint it's not Fred and Harry I'm worried about.  
_"You seemed a little dazed, where'd you go?"

"Oh Harry, yeah I'm fine, peachy..."

"Uh Hermione?"  
_Dammit! Even his voice sounds hot!  
_"You um have a little, um, drool, I guess right there."  
_He points to my chin  
___

_I wipe it away, horrified trying to keep my cool  
_"Oh silly me, thanks, George."

"Are you sure you're okay? Hey why are you smiling like that?"  
_I giggle, nervously_

"Yeah Ron, I'm fine."  
_I tried to hide my smile_

"What were you thinking about?"  
_Damn Fred and his damn inquisitiveness. There I go again_

__  
"Nothing, nothing---"

"Nothing important."  
_All four say in unison_

"No seriously Hermione, is something on your mind?"  
_Oh George if you only knew_

"Yeah come on Hermione, you can tell us."  
_Nah, Ronald if you only knew as well you'd know well enough that it would embarrass the hell out of you_

"No really you guys, it was nothing just thinking about what I was gonna write for my potions essay."  
_They all seem pretty pleased with that answer, except George.  
__He raises his eyebrow suspiciously, about ready to retort but thinks better of it and goes back to his lunch._

* * *

I feel like taunting "I know something you don't know..." except for that fact that I really wouldn't want them to know. Wow I have a really creative imagination. Sweet, little perverted me. I'm sitting on a bench at the quidditch pitch. Ron's the new keeper, because apparently the old one just couldn't hack it. He's doing surprisingly well. It rained earlier today so the ground is muddy. Correction--so the players are muddy. Ahaha, okay, perversion needs to stop. I liked my sarcasm better. I'm sure you did too. Whomever you may be. Anywho, the captain, I don't know his name, blows the whistle, practice has officially ended. I skip down the stands to greet my boys on the field. Wow. Damn mud. If only you could see them. I'm trying hard not to swoon. Actually I'm trying hard not to do a lot of things. They all seem to have gotten pretty warm because they don't seem to be so heavily uniformed and a lot of sleeves are rolled up. Jiminy Cricket! George just lifted up the bottom of his jumper to wipe his forehead. Fainting about to commence...

* * *

"Whoa there Hermione..."  
_I feel two very strong arms around me so I turn.  
__Dammit here comes the swooning again._

"Yeah Ron I'm fine, sorry err, lost my step."  
_What I should say is "Yeah Ron your fine" but something tells me that wouldn't be an educated thing to do. But oh he is fine. Sweaty, muddy. He must've taken off his jumper because he's in a white t-shirt. Wow. I hate my friends.  
_"Ron, you can let go of me now, I'm fine."

"Alright, alright, sorry. You just seem a little out of it lately."

"Yeah I know there's a lot of homework this year I think it's taking its toll on me."

"Alright if you say-- Dammit, George, put her down!"  
_I don't see him saying this seeing as I have just been slung over someone's shoulder.  
__I can hear the culprit laughing.  
__I know that laugh all too well._

"Fine Ronnekins, fine. But you're gonna have to make me."  
_Like Ron, I can hear him smile too.  
__I'm being moved again.  
I'm now fully in his arms.  
__Looking into his laughing eyes.  
_"You don't mind do you?"

"Mind what exactly? That you grab me off the ground and are now running with me away from two very enraged quidditch players?"

_He chuckles  
_"Yeah that about sums it up. But it's not really Harry that I'm worried about."  
_He glances over his shoulder  
_"From the look of it, he's trying to stop Ron from killing me."  
_I glance over his shoulder. He speaks the truth._

"Ron calm down. He's not gonna drop her or anything."  
_Harry's panting while trying to catch up with an enraged Ron_

"Harry, how thick are you? It's not the dropping I'm worried about. It's the where."

"What in the bloody hell are you on about Ron?"  
_I shout. Ron stops fire in his eyes. Harry doubles over catching his breathe. George stops. Fred is still laughing from the quidditch pitch.  
__George slowly, cautiously walks over to Ron. Still clutching me in his arms._

"George if you don't put her down right now I'll, I'll, I'll..."

"You'll what Ronald? I do hope that you remember that though you are a tad taller then me I have beaten you to a pulp on several occasions."  
_Ron gulps_

"I'll tell Mum."  
_It was George's turn to gulp.  
__He very slowly dipped me over then back right on my feet. One graceful motion._

"Sorry Hermione."  
_He's fidgeting again, then SMACK!_

"Bugger Ron! Ya Wanker! What the fuck was that--"  
_Before George could finish Ron pelted another one towards him.  
__SMACK! This time is was Ron who was dumfounded._

"Come on now guys, why can't we just calm down a bit."  
_There goes Harry being the peace maker.  
__Ron and George look at each other.  
__Glare and then nod.  
__George sits down on the grass.  
__Ron walks over and stands by me._

"Why'd you hit me?"

"Why do you bloody well think?"

"Because you're an overprotective little cunt who gets jealous? Maybe, is that the right answer?"

_Ron makes a leap for George. Harry holds him back._

"Where do you get that from?"  
_Ron snarls_

"Lucky guess?"  
_George can be a right cocky little shite when he wants to be_

"Well for your information, no. I just didn't want my dumb arse of a brother doing anything my best friend. Your not known for your social graces, you know."  
_Ron can be a cocky little shite too_

"Overprotective."

"Arsehole."

"Boys, boys. Now do I need to owl Mum?"  
_Fred had finally joined the fight.  
__He was now restraining George just as Harry was doing with Ron  
__Ron and George look at him with the utmost contempt.  
_"That's what I thought. Now George, apologize to Hermione."

"Already did."

"Did he Hermione?"

"Yeah he did, it was fine really."  
_I don't understand why this is such a big deal_

"Good, then Ron apologize to George."

"No! Why should I?"

"Because you don't want Mum to have to make you, and you did wallop him a good shiner."

"Fine. Sorry George."  
_Ron's mumble was barely auditable._

"Now George."

"Sorry Ron....little doss cun-"

"George! Not needed, not needed at all."

"Well I think that it--"

"You're going to think nothing. Considering I have you and little Ronnekins here wrapped around my finger."

"What do you mean?"  
_Ron and George say in unison_

_Fred looks from me to Harry and then to me again  
_"Harry would you be so kind as to walk Hermione back to the common room? Ron, George and I need to have a bit of a chat."

"Why can't I stay here?"  
_My confusion is building up_

"Just go Hermione."  
_George and Ron really need to stop with the unison thing  
__Harry takes my arm and we walk back to the castle not speaking a word.  
__We get to the dorms and he turns to leave_

"Harry wait, do you have any idea what this is about?"

"Oh I have my suspicions."

"Well then what--"

"You'll find out soon enough Hermione. But now I have to go down and make sure they don't tear Fred or each other limb from limb. Goodnight."

* * *

And that is how I was left. And that is how one hour later I am still left. Confused beyond belief. But yet my heart keeps skipping a beat. I mean ok the boy I loved got in a fight for me with his brother whom I think i'm getting stronger feelings for. I can see all four of them outside my window, still on the grounds. Fred and Harry are restraining Ron and George again except this time Fred has Ron and Harry has George. It's probably more effective considering Fred is stronger then Ron and Harry has a good 3 inches on George. Not that George is short or anything, I think he's about 5'11, or 6. There I go rambling again. Someone's knocking at my door now.

* * *

"Hermione, come on let me in."  
_It's Ginny_

"Alright, Gin hold on for a minute."  
_She looks exasperated.  
_"Is everything alright?"  
__

_She sits on my bed  
_"Everything's fine, they sent me to make sure you didn't go anywhere."  
_I look at her in disbelief, how did she know?  
_"Invisibility cloak."

"So you're gonna tell me what's going on then?"

"No. I'm not supposed to. They need to tell you. Besides it's way to confusing anyway."

_I sigh disappointed  
__It's going to be a long night._

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**

**(yeah I know it's not a real term but me and my friends use it so I felt the need to put it here...it basically mean having one's way with something)**


	4. Chapter Four: She Screams In Silence

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "She screams in silence" is all from Green Day, not me.**

**Author's Note: This one's kinda short but I had to end it where I did because, well I wanted to. Thanks to everyone who reads this and to all my reviewers. I appreciate it so much. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Four: She Screams In Silence**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I know you can't hear me crying but I'm longing to hold you."-Reach The Sky_

Ginny's next to me reading a magazine. She still won't tell me what's going on. Damn the Weasley stubbornness. And damn the Granger curiosity.

Maybe George likes me. Does Fred know? Does Harry? Holy shite! What if Ron likes me? Oh my God! I'm think I'm hyperventilating. What if George likes me and Ron's jealous because he likes me too? But Ron has Lavender and George? Well why would George like a _know it all_ like me, his little brother's friend? But wouldn't it be great? No it wouldn't. It would be wonderful! Simply wonderful! If either one of them liked me. It'd be like a dream come true.

Wow I'm really getting a head of myself now. Ginny's already in bed. Maybe I should try and get some sleep. I took a quick glance out my window. I didn't see the boys. Maybe they came inside. Oh well, goodnight.

I tried to fall asleep but I just woke up again. I just glanced over at the clock. It's 12:10, ugh dammit. I can hear quiet snoring next to me. So I wouldn't sneak out, Ginny decided to sleep in my room tonight. Why couldn't she sleep on the floor?

Somebody's yelling in the common room. It sounds faintly like Ron. Hmmm, maybe I should investigate. I slyly slipped out of bed, so not to wake Ginny, but an explosion of Fred and George's fireworks couldn't wake her up..._sighs_ _George_...alright, Hermione, focus. I found Harry invisibility cloak on the floor from where Ginny dropped it. I crept slowly down the steps and am now sitting up against the wall.

From the looks of it, the fight is no where finished. Harry still has George and Ron is still stuck in Fred's grasp. All four boys look worse for the wear. George is sporting a new black eye, and Ron's lip and nose are bleeding. Harry and Fred look disheveled. Ron and George are still shouting obscenities and then...

* * *

"George, she's not your type!"

_George stops struggling and looks almost dumbfounded  
_"Is that what you think? You think I like Hermione?"

"Well, ye--"

_George shakes his head  
_"Don't worry Ron. I don't."

"Yeah, but the way you always smile at her and stuff..."  
_Ron seems at a loss for words_

"Ron, I'm just being friendly. Sure I like Hermione just not the way you seem to think. Wait a moment...Do you like Hermione?"

"What?!?!?!? No, she's my best friend."  
_At this point, Fred and Harry took their queue and headed up the stairs  
__Unnoticed by Ron and George.  
_"Besides, I have Lavender. I love Lavender."

"Does Hermione know?"

"Of course she knows."

"Well then,"  
_George chuckles  
_"What was our fight about?"

_Ron gingerly puts a finger to where his lip is bleeding and sighs  
_"I just thought that you were trying to get her into your trousers or something like that."

_George has a thinking expression on his face and then chuckles, yet again  
_"Ah, ickle Ronnekins, jumping to conclusions as usual."

_Ron clenches his fist, he's on the defense again  
_"Yeah, well when your brother's got himself a... hmmm, what's the word, a habit?"  
_George cringes, waiting for his brother to continue  
_"Yeah, a habit of shagging anything that walks it's sorta hard not to go jumping."

"Hey now, I wouldn't do that to Hermione."

"I know, it's just well..."  
_Unable to finish his thought Ron changes the subject  
_"What did _you _think we were fighting about?"

"Oh...I thought that you really liked Hermione, and was jealous because I was touching her or something."

"Hmm, jumping to conclusions must be a Weasley thing."

"Yeah, I suppose. So you really _love_ Lavender, huh?"

"You know, I think I do."

"Well that's good. Best of luck to ya, with that. Oh and by the way before we're all matey again, don't expect an apology because it's not really my thing."

"Yeah I wasn't planning on saying 'sorry' either."

"Well, now that we're on the same page, how about a shake then?"  
_George offers his hand_

"A shake."  
_Ron shakes it_

"Alright, Ronnekins lets get some sleep."  
_ George says as he slightly pushes Ron towards the steps_

_Ron shakes his brother off  
_"Alright _Mum._"

_George's face contorts into an expression of mock hurt and shock before going into that damned Weasley smile  
_"Bugger off."

* * *

I'm still sitting here against the wall, long after they've gone to bed. Tears are soaking my notebook. I don't know when I started crying, all I know is that I can't stop. I silently scream. How could I be so thick, so naive to think that I had a chance with one of them?

I need to stop writing now. I can't see anymore there's too many tears now. But no matter how long I sit here crying or how many tears are shed, I can't help but smile at the classic Weasley stubbornness, all the while damning my own curiosity.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	5. Chapter Five: I Can't Remember To Forget...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "I can't remember to forget your face" is all from Tokyo Rose, not me.**

**Author's Note: Wow I got an awesome amount of reviews and it makes me feel so special. I'm so glad you guys like it and don't worry I don't plan on finishing it anytime soon, it's just way to much fun to write. So thanks very much to all who read this and everyone who reviewed. I appreciate it very much. I write these in a notebook before I type them up so I'm never really to sure on their length. I'm sorry if they're short but I end them where I think necessary. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Five: I Can't Remember To Forget Your Face**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Color the coast with your smile it's the most genuine thing I've ever seen."-Dashboard Confessional_

It's been about two weeks since that night in the common room. The only people who know about the fight are Fred, George, Harry, Ron, Ginny, and I. When people asked George how he got his black eye he said he snuck out for more quidditch practice and had another accident. Ron said he fell down the stairs when people inquired about his lip. I tried to forget about what I heard but I couldn't. I acted like nothing happened. Everyone agreed, whether they knew the whole story or not (the only ones knowing the whole story being me, Ron, and George), that it was a misunderstanding and that's how it was left.

* * *

"Hermione are you ready yet?"

"Yeah, Gin, just gimme ten more minutes."

* * *

Padma, Parvati, Ginny, and I are sneaking out to Hogsmeade tonight, for a party. Padma found out about the party from Cho Chang, in Ravenclaw. We didn't tell anyone else about it, or that we were going, (we did mention it to Lavender but she said she already had plans), hence the whole sneaking out bit.

Ginny and Parvati dressed me. I feel...vulnerable? I think that would be the right word. It's just a t-shirt and a skirt but it's not exactly Hermione attire. I just feel very out of place.

Well Ginny's on the verge of pulling the notebook out of my hand so I guess I'll finish when I get back.

Yeah, so tonight was...interesting? We borrowed the invisibility cloak and Marauder's map from Harry so we could sneak out without any sort of disruption. We convinced Harry that we were doing stuff for S.P.E.W. but not to tell anyone because people hated the idea of it. We met Cho and Padma and some of their Ravenclaw friends in the Great Hall and headed for Hogsmeade. When we got to the party Cho and I stayed outside for a while debating whether or not to go in. We decided to give it a try because all our friends were in there. We walked in to the party and ran into Rodger Davies, who graduated the year before. I was always pretty friendly with him and Cho was in his old house so we talked to him for a bit. Then we went looking for the girls and I saw him. The boy I've had a crush on since I was a first year.

Oliver Wood. God he looked good. Still playing quidditch, he was still very built. He always looked out for me. I would see him in the library all the time trying to figure out new plays for Gryffindor. Nobody knew about our friendship because, well, we didn't really let anyone know. He was a popular quidditch player and I was a bookworm four years younger then him. We were only convenient friends. But there he was, at a party in Hogsmeade, in all his glory.

I couldn't say hi to him, of course. It would be too dodgy. But oh, could I stare! Then as luck would have it (_sarcasm to be noted)_ we found the girls. They had just taken a break from dancing and were talking excitedly about something. They were about to go back to dancing when they spotted us. I guess they were having a lot of fun because it didn't really seem to matter whether we were there or not. It kinda hurt. I think Cho felt the same way. Even though we don't know each other that well I could see it. When they went back to do their thing we decided to slip out but on our way I spotted Oliver again. Cho being the ever thinking Ravenclaw, knew something was up right away.

* * *

"You fancy him, eh?"

"No, well yeah I used to."

"By the looks of it you still do."

"Aye, but now he's just something to look at. We used to be pretty close though."  
_The look of inquisitiveness on Cho's face prompted me to tell her the story_

"So, you're gonna say hi then?"

"Nah, it'd be too weird. I haven't spoken to the kid in almost two years. Besides he'd probably be a bastard and ignore me."  
_She looked somewhat disappointed in my answer  
_"Alright, fine. Maybe if I stare long enough he'll see me and I'll wave."  
_She seemed satisfied with that_

_I stood there for five minutes and did nothing because he didn't see me, then he walked into another room_

"Alright then, ready to go?"

"Yeah sure, I'm too disappointed in myself to stay."

* * *

We left the party but Cho pointed out that it was only 8:30 and we'd have to get back after everyone was in their rooms to sneak in properly which wouldn't be until around 11:30. So we decided to walk around Hogsmeade until then.

We walked everywhere we could think of. I've never really spent any sort of time with Cho because I never really gave her a chance after the whole Harry thing and all but she's really a nice girl. We talked a lot and about a lot of things. As we walked by the Three Broomsticks for about our fourth time we saw a group of people standing outside. One guy I recognized to be one of Victor Krum's mates. His name was Igor, his parents were Bulgarian but he grew up in England. He played for Bulgaria like Victor, but visited England quite a bit. He was a nice guy I spent a lot of time with him when I visited Victor a couple of summers ago, when I liked him.

I pointed Igor out to Cho and we decided to pretend to go into the Three Broomsticks for a butterbeer so we could say hi. As we were walking back towards the door, Igor spotted me, waved and then turned to the guy behind him.

* * *

"Victor, Victor! Look who it is. It's Hermione."

* * *

Victor turned to look as did the girl he picked over me, Zera. She hates me. I don't think I've ever seen a person glare at someone as much as she does at me. Victor being his ever charming self walked up to me and said hello. I introduced him and Igor to Cho and we had an awkward conversation full of pleasantries and uncomfortable ness. I can't help thinking about how good Victor looked. He got taller and a bit leaner and his hair got a little lighter and longer. When he shook my hand before he left I noticed his hands got bigger too. He and the team were in London for an interview with the Daily Prophet. I think Igor noticed how uncomfortable everyone was and how Zera's death glares just didn't seem to stop, so after about ten minutes he suggested that they be getting on their way.

As Cho and I walked into the Three Broomsticks I told her what happened between us. I told her about how we both liked each other a lot and dated a little bit over the summer I stayed with him in Bulgaria but how one day, almost a week after I came home I saw Igor in Diagon Alley and he told me about how Victor had just recently got a girlfriend named Zera. I'm still confused and little bitter about the whole thing. It's sort of shady how nervous Victor still got around me, like a little schoolboy or something, just like he did when we were dating or how after almost two years Zera still found it necessary to glare. I wonder what she knows about me?

It was around 11:15 when Cho and I headed back to the castle. I thanked her for staying with me and said goodbye in the Great Hall. As I walked backed to the common room I thought about how bazaar the whole evening had been. Stalking Oliver, running into Igor and Victor, and getting to know Cho.

I walked into the lonely common room and up to my even lonelier dorm. I put on my pajamas and decided to take advantage of the common room being empty, so I took a book down there and began reading. After a few moments I heard someone on the stairs and then Ron appeared in the doorway. He smiled and sat down next to me on the couch.

* * *

"Hello."  
_He smiled again_

"Hey there."  
_I smiled back_

"What's up?"

"Eh, nothing much just got home, yourself?"

"Me also, where did you go?"

"A party in Hogsmeade. It was shite so Cho and I left and then we ran into Igor and Victor. Where were you off to?"

_He chuckles  
_"Wait, I wanna hear about this awesomeness. So what all went down?"  
_I summed up the whole evening with all the key points:  
__-Sneaking out  
__-Oliver  
__-Being ditched  
__-Leaving  
__-Victor  
__-And then coming home_

"Wow."  
_That was all he could seem to say_

"Oh and Ginny and Parvati made me wear a skirt."

"Skirts are cool. Don't worry."

_I giggle.  
_"Thank you. I think they were proud."

"Parties are so played out."

"Yeah, they are."

"Bill takes me to see bands sometimes. Shows...the more intense party."  
_I giggle at his use of the muggle term  
__He continues  
_"I snuck out and saw a Muggle film. Wimbledon, the movie with Kirsten Dunst."

_I am shocked by Ron's knowledge of muggleisms but then remember Lavender's own list of them, her being a muggle and all._

"Ooooh really? How was it?"

"It was awesome. I love that film. It's real good. Go see it."

"Alright, I'll take your word for it."

"Oh, and when dinner was over tonight I repierced my ear. Well the front hole was still there but the back closed up."

"What'd you use?"

"Just a stud."

"Oh, Jesus that must've hurt."

"I'm gonna start stretching them when it heals."  
_Lavender must really have an impression on him. The muggleisms are killing me_

"That'd be hot. You defiantly should do it."

"Yep, alright I'm gonna go to bed. Goodnight Hermione."  
_He walks towards the stairs_

"Night dear Ron."

"Night."

* * *

I waited a couple of minutes then I went to my own room. It really was an interesting night. Oliver, Victor and Ron all with in four hours of each other. I didn't think I'd see Ron anytime tonight, and I didn't expect to see Oliver or Victor anytime soon. I really don't like boys. They have no idea what they can do to girls. And the way Ron said goodnight really got to me. I don't know why because it wasn't anything different, it just hit me different_. It always hits me different._

I left my window open. It's getting colder out. The leaves are changing. I don't wanna be wrapped up in blankets this year. I want to be wrapped up in someone's arms. If only...

It amazes me how as soon as you get someone out of your mind, as soon as you stop seeing them when you close your eyes, they show up. Right in front of you. I wonder if I'll ever forget Ron's face. Right now I can't remember to forget it. I can't forget that smile. Or the way he says goodnight.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	6. Chapter Six: I, I, I, Like You

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "I...I...I...Like You" is all Hellogoodbye, not me.**

**Author's Note: As usual, I would like to thank everyone who reads this and reviews, it means a bunch to me. Also I was really disappointed in how my last chapter turned out. I apologize for that and hope that this one is a little bit better. I would also like to point out though, that I know Hermione rambles. She was written to ramble. Teenage girls ramble, even if they don't know it. Well I think I'm done for now. Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Six: I...I...I...Like You**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did."-Plain White T_

Infuriating. That's exactly it. Boys are the most infuriating creatures on the face of the planet. And I just happen to be in love with one. Bastard. He still has no clue, what so ever. Well actually, I have to give myself a tap on the back because I really pull it off very well, flawless.

So yeah, anyway. Infuriating. Today proved that. All of them. Infuriating gits, I swear.

Well it all started this morning at breakfast. I walked into the great hall, still half asleep. Ron was already there working fervently on his homework. Harry was sitting across from him having what looked to be a very in depth conversation with Neville.

* * *

"Morning."

"Hey."  
_He grumbled_

_I put my bag down on the table. I was looking for a quill.  
_"How's the ear?"  
_I inquired about his newly pierced appendage. _

"Eh, it still hurts but I can touch it now."  
_He demonstrated _

"Oh man, I'm sorry..."  
_I reached down and gave him a hug. _

* * *

God, I haven't hugged him in so long and boy did I miss it.There's just something about the way he hugs you.

* * *

_I then sat down on the bench and began drinking my tea._

"I'm sooooooo tired."  
_He stretched and yawned.  
__Then laid his head on my arm that was on the table holding my teacup._

_Damn Him._

_He sat up again.  
__I for some reason felt the need to put my head on his shoulder. _

* * *

Don't know why, but it was there. And, yes I realize how corny this sounds but it felt so...right. Like I was supposed to be there.

* * *

_Then he leaned over and whispered in my ear  
_"Dean and Parvati broke up but shhh no one knows."

* * *

That was all he said, nothing more nothing less. But it sent shivers down my spine. Then Lavender had to show up and sit next to him. Foiled Again!

After my third class I was walking in the corridors when a certain Harry Potter came up next to me.

* * *

"Are you gonna ask him?"

"No."

"Come on Hermione, it's only George."

"No."

"Okay Hermione, if you don't ask him out by tonight, I'll tell him."

"Well you better get ready Harry because I don't plan on asking him anything."  
  
"Fine have it your way."  
_He walked away into the Great Hall for lunch_

* * *

Lunch was well, lunch. Something kind of stuck out though. A little first year, that was sitting by us had a Chocolate Frog and was looking at the card that he had gotten. Ron knew the card, just at a glance.

* * *

"He mastered a labyrinth in 550 B.C."  
_Ron said as if he stated that everyday_

"Wow, he did do that."  
_The little boy was in awe_

_Harry however had a confused look on his face  
_"Wait a moment Ron, didn't you stop collecting Chocolate Frog cards a long time ago?"

"Yeah, but I still know everything about um."  
_He answered in a nonchalant manner_

"Yeah, man you used to love um.  
I remember that's all you talked about. You had so many."  
_Ron chuckled at the truth in Harry's statement_

"What did you do with them all?"  
_Squeaked the little first year, still listening intently_

"I sold them. Hermione was pretty mad about that."

"That I was."  
_Ron smiled at me. It was an understanding smile, like he knew why I had gotten mad at him. I don't even know why I got mad at him._

* * *

The rest of my classes went by without anything really interesting. Which translates into no embarrassing moments, and/or Ron-isms.

After dinner I was sitting outside talking to Cho. The weather was still fairly warm for early fall so it was very comfortable. We had been out there for a while talking about the "cute Hogwarts couples."

* * *

"I know they're so adorable."  
_Cho almost squealed with her statement_

_I felt an arm go around me and looked up to see a smiling Ron staring down at me  
_"Oh well, then you must have been talking about us."  
_He squeezed my shoulder as he said this. I reached my arm up and hugged him back.  
__(two times today, wow)  
__He chuckled then sat down on there grass, where Harry seemed to have appeared  
__And looked at Cho  
_"No, really who were you talking about?"

"Luna Lovegood and the Hufflepuff keeper."

"Oh, that's _hot_."  
_His sarcasm was almost oozing out_

"So are you."  
_I had honestly no idea that I said that outloud._

"Hermione, what'd you say?"

"Nothing, thinking about something Cho had said earlier about some entirely different topic."  
_Good, he hadn't heard me  
__But I should get an award for my smoothness  
__(sarcasm to be noted)_

"Fine, whatever just talk about me and hurt my feelings."  
_He had a mock sadness lacing his voice.  
__He sounded like a little kid.  
__It was adorable_

"Aww pooor Ronnekins."  
_I hugged him again, damn three times in one day.  
__I'm on a roll.  
__He chuckled._

"Harry, how about a game of chess?"

"Yeah, sure."

_They got up and began walking towards the castle  
_"Bye guys."  
_They said in unison_

_After they were out of earshot Cho looked at me giggling. __When she was finished she made one statement, a statement I didn't really want to hear.  
_"You two are soooooo cute together. You would make the greatest couple.

* * *

DAMNIT DAMNIT DAMNIT!

So yeah, that was my day. Boys are infuriating simply because they are. No reason, they just are. Especially when you love them. I'm in the library now thinking about everything. It hurts so much to hug someone as a friend and wish you were hugging them as something more. I always wish for more. I wish I was more. I wish I was more then a buddy or a sidekick. I wish he would look at me differently, in some sort of different light. But he never will. And it kills me to see him every day and to think that. To think that while helping him with his homework or watching him play quidditch. Damnit, it murders me.

I really, truely don't want to love him. It hurts too much. It's gotten to the point that I love him so much I wish I hated him. I sincerely didn't mean to fall in love, but I did and there's nothing I can seem to do about it. Things just can't be easy. Ron has to make it difficult. Nothing can ever be easy for me. Nothing is ever a walk in the park or a piece of cake. I've never been to a park and I don't like cake. I swear I'm being punished. And yet I can't help but sit in class and day dream about everything being different. It will never workout though. Bloody hell, we can't even make one simple kiss work out.

Yes, your eyes are fine. I said (wrote, what have you) kiss. It was around the end of our fourth year. It was only a dare. So awkward. So you know, he's a lot taller then me so when he went in for the kiss we were both laughing, well he ended up biting my lip and I banged my forehead into his. It was a complete diaster. I probably shouldn't even count it. But I do, because it was something tangible. I just wish I had more tangible somethings.

It utterly baffles me how one four letter word can affect someone so much. Love. I really don't like that word. But why, why did I have to get stuck with it? And why, god why does it have to be him? Him the boy who is crazy at chess, or him with his damn smile, or him who sells his childhood away.

That's it. I know why he smiled his understanding smile and I know why I was mad in the first place. When he sold those cards it meant that he was growing up. He sold his childhood away. He loved those damn cards. But he wasn't a little boy anymore, and he knew it. He's actually grown up a lot, and not just physically, since I've met him and that scares me. The future scares me. Change scares me. I know deep down that if I ever tell Ron I love him it'll change everything and I don't deal with change very well. I don't like the idea of growing up, either and saying "I love you" seems like a very adult thing to do.

I abandoned my post in the library. The librarian didn't appreciate me crying. Christ, I don't appreciate me crying. Don't ask me why I'm crying, cause I don't really know but I seem to be doing that a lot lately. It's not fun. I wouldn't recommend it. Oh shite someone's coming...

* * *

"Hermione, why are you crying?"  
_I quickly tried to wipe away my tears with my sleeve_

"Huh? What? I'm not crying."  
_I barely snuffled it out_

"Yes you are, I can tell."  
_He sat next to me on the sofa_

"So what if I am?"

"Tell me why you're crying. Is it about George?"  
_Ron, poor clueless Ron_

"No, it's not about George, hey wait a minute, where the hell did you come from?"

"The portait hole."

"I know that I mean, where as in location."

"I was nicking food from the kitchen, anyway we're not talking about me we're talking about you. Now, what's wrong?"

"Oh Ron, it's just so silly."  
_My chin started quivering again  
__He put his arms around me in one of those signature Ron hugs  
__My face was buried in his shoulder and I just cried._

"No, come on now, you can tell me. I know it's about George."

"NO IT'S NOT ABOUT GEORGE!"  
_I roared into his shoulder_

"Alright, then what is it about?"

"I told you it's silly."

"So tell me anyway."

"Well, alright... I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"The future, change, life. I don't want to grow up and I don't want things to change. It's so overwhelming."

"Things won't change that drastically, Hermione."

"Yes they will. We'll all change, and grow up, and go our separate ways, and never see each other again."

"No we won't I promise. Besides there's something else that's bothering you. I can tell."

"Well I...I...I..."

"Yeah?"

"I...I...I...Like..."

"George, yeah I know."  
_His voice had some underlying contempt, almost_

"And no one will ever like me back."

"Don't say that."

"I only speak the truth. I'm going to be one of those dodgy old ladies who has hundreds of cats."  
_An imagine of Ron and Lavender, happy with a family flashed through my head.  
__Then an imagine of me surrounded by cats.  
__I started bawling again._

* * *

At this point he gave up the fight. There's no point in arguing with a bawling teenage girl. You'll lose. He just did what he could do. He sat there and hugged me until I didn't have any tears left. We sat there forever, and once again it felt right. When he had made sure I finished crying he walked me to the stair cases and sent me on my way. But Ron always has to have the last word.

* * *

"Wait, I have some good news."  
_I turned to look at him and nodded for him to continue  
_"Harry didn't tell George!"  
_He smiled, I smiled back_

* * *

He waited for me to get to the top of the steps, I guess to make sure I went to bed.

* * *

"Oh and Hermione; you really should tell him."

* * *

I should tell him. But I don't plan on it being anytime soon and we're not even talking about the same "him."

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	7. Chapter Seven: An Accidental Charm

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "An accidental charm" is all Jawbreaker, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks, as always to the people who leave the reviews and to everyone who reads this, you have no idea how much it means to have people actually reading what I write. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Seven: An Accidental Charm**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_And I kissed you in a style Clark Gable would have admired."-The Postal Service_

Not a lot has happened since the night in the common room. It's been a while and everything went back to normal. Neither Ron nor I ever said a word, even to each, other about that night. He's been spending a lot more time with Lavender recently. He's never really around anymore.

Well, I'm sitting outside by the lake, just thinking. It's one of those early autumn nights where you can actually smell the leaves changing. It's so wonderful. I love it. It helps me think. I am so confused right now. I really can't even tell the difference between my own feelings. And yes, of course this has to do with boys. Ron hasn't really said anything of relevance to me since that night. And George? Well I don't even know if it's just a little crush, or if I really do like him. Ugh, I really wish I wasn't so mad over boys. Other then that it's been normal. Nothing new, nothing old, just the same shite.

Everything has really been annoying me lately, hence my sitting outside while everyone else is at dinner. I just need to be alone, have time to think. But I have so many thoughts that I really pointless to try and sort them out but I'm trying anyway. Dammit. Wow, it really is rather chilly. I should've brought my cloak with me but I've been pretty thick lately. Ah, well I still don't wanna go inside.

I hear the leaves crunch behind me.

* * *

"Hullo Hermione!"  
_He sat down on the grass next to me  
_"What are you up to?"

"Hi George, nothing much just thinking, writing."  
_He leaned over my shoulder trying to look at my notebook  
__I shut it fast_

"Whatcha writing?"

"Eh, nothing just rambles. Anyway what are you doing out here? Shouldn't you be at dinner?"

"I should ask you the same thing."

"I asked you first."

"Fine, fine you win."  
_I smirked  
__He nudged me a bit  
_"Anyway, thought I might take a walk.  
I have a lot of thinking to do, and I thought a nice stroll would help me with that."

"Same here. Minus the walking part. I'm just sitting out here, thinking."

"Thinking about what?"  
_He raised his eyebrow_

"A lot of things."

"Me perhaps?"

"Oh yes George, right you are. I was just thinking about how absolutely adorable you are."  
_Let's just forget the fact that I was really doing that  
___

_He chuckled  
_"That's right, you should be.  
But really, what were you thinking about?"

"How confused I am."

_He looked at me with his mouth hanging open and gasped  
_"The great Hermione Granger, confused?!?!?!?!?!?!  
Why, that's an outrage?!?!?!?!?!"

"I know right, I shouldn't be confused. I know everything. But unfortunately that is not very true."

_He smiled an understanding smile. The same one as Ron.  
_"What are you confused about?"

"No it's silly; you don't want to hear my problems."

"Try me."

"Boys."

"Aha! I knew it."

"Did you now?"

"Yes I did. What boy?"

"No, no, no. I am not telling you."

"Oh, come on Hermione. You can tell me anything."

"Nope. They're nothing special. Just guys."

"Come on pleeeeeeease. Or at least tell me what's going on."

"Maybe."  
_He looked at me like a little boy who lost his way home. Damn him.  
_"Alright I can tell you a bit of the situation. Nothing more."

"Fab."

"Well there's this one boy who I really like a lot but I really can't do anything about that one for undisclosed reasons."

"Do I know him?"

"No, he's a muggle."  
_I said that a little too fast  
__Thank god he didn't notice_

"Oh, continue."  
_He waved his hand in continuation_

"And I really like this other boy as well, but I could never tell him because it just wouldn't be worth it."

"Well, I think you should wait on the first one until you have it figured out. But I think you should give the second one a try."

"I like your idea with the first one but the second one isn't going to work."

"And why not?"

"Because he doesn't like me."

"And how would you know."

"Because I do."

"Fine, be right. But I suggest you think about my advice."

"Fair enough, thanks."

"Eh, no problem."  
_I shivered  
_"Are you cold?"

"Yeah a little but I don't wanna go inside."

"Well then here."  
_He opened his cloak a little ways and wrapped it and his arm around me.  
__It was lovely.  
_"There, better now?"

"Mmmhmm. I believe so."

"Good. I couldn't just sit there and let you freeze."

"Well thank you, good sir."

"Your welcome, ma' lady."

_I giggled  
_"So what were you thinking about?"

"Nothing."

"Oh come on I told you."

"Not really."

"Well alright I gave you a generalization but that still means I deserve to hear one from you."

_He smiles down at me.  
_"Damn you and your big words."  
_I stuck my tongue out at him.  
_"Fine, if you must know...girls."

"And why would the grand George Weasley be thinking about girls?"

"Is there anything else to think about?"

"Well--"

"And, for the record I was pondering a situation. I wasn't just thinking about random birds."

"And what was this situation you were pondering?"

"Eh..."  
_He hesitated  
_"Well, I like this one girl but I don't really know how. I mean, she's great and wonderful and pretty but I can't decide whether I like her as a friend--"

"Or as something else."  
_finished for him._

Yeah. You hit the bludger right on the head.  
_That's because it's the way I feel about you, arse_

"I think you and I are sharing a similar boat."

"I just hope we don't sink."

"Me too Weasley, me too."

* * *

We sat there talking for a long time. About everything. School, home, friends. I just feel so comfortable around him. So much like myself.

* * *

"What?"  
_He looked down at me_

"Huh?"

"You're looking at me funny"

"Oh it's nothing."  
_Quick change of subject  
_"By the way you smell really good."  
_Smooth Hermione, as usual._

"Oh, well thanks, I guess. What do I smell like?"

"Hmmm..."  
_I sniffed him  
__He chuckled  
_"...fall."

"What?"

"Fall, you smell like fall."

"Is that a good thing?"

"Oh, yes it's wonderful."  
_He chuckled again  
__I turned a bit red  
_"Sorry."

"No, it's alright you're just helping in the boast George's confidence fund."

"Well I suppose that's a good thing."

"You suppose right."

_I looked at his watch  
__His arm was still around me and his hand was resting on my shoulder.  
_"We've been out here forever. It's really late."

_He looked at the time.  
_"Bloody hell, it is. We better get inside."  
_He stood up and brushed himself off.  
_"Well come on then."  
_He helped me up and then wrapped the cloak around both of us again._

_We walked into the castle and before we knew it we heard that drawling voice.  
_"Granger and Weasley what an adorable little couple."

"Just ignore him."  
_George said to me as he took off the cloak_

"Pity really, the last thing you Weasleys need is some wretched little Mudblood ruining any dignity you have left. If you even have that going for you."  
_We walked by him as he said this.  
__I could see George's fist in his pocket.  
__He really was trying._

"Weasley and Mudblood sitting in a tree kissi--"  
_But Malfoy couldn't finish his song.  
__George's self control bounded out the door as he pelted Malfoy right in the jaw._

"Why you little bastard."  
_Malfoy charged at George.  
__And got him right above his eye._

* * *

After that I couldn't keep track of who was hitting who. All I know is that I was trying my hardest to pry them apart. They finally stopped after what felt like hours. They had run out of energy.

Malfoy was bent over clutching his stomach. Blood was dripping from his mouth and a bruise was forming on his cheek bone and jaw.

George looked as if he had run a marathon because he was so out of breath. There was blood dripping from the corner of his lip and his left eyebrow but he was standing up straight. His lips were playing at a proud smile. He looked damn good.

Malfoy staggered a bit, looked at George with the utmost contempt and started gimping back to the dungeons.

* * *

  
"Just you wait Weasley. You'll pay."

"Yeah sure Malfoy. By the way, the gimp suits you."  
_Malfoy turned and looked at George with murderous eyes.  
__George didn't move. His arms were crossed and the smile was still playing at his lips.  
__Malfoy had lost the fight and he knew it. _

* * *

I helped George up to the common room. As it turns out he acquired a bit of a twisted ankle as well but he attempted to walk normally. It was kinda funny really watching him stride and then stagger.

When we got to the common room it was empty. Everyone went to bed early on week nights. I sat George down on one of the sofas and conjured up some stuff to fix him up.

* * *

"Alright George this is gonna sting."  
_I said as I went to put some peroxide on his eyebrow.  
__It only barely touched him and he winced in pain._

"Jesus Hermione! Bloody kill me! That shite hurts."

"Fine then, if you don't want me to do it we can take you down to Madame Pomfrey and she can sort you out."

"No, not that. I'll get detention because if you recall i did throw the first punch"

"That you did so you seem to have no other option."  
_I once again attempted to put it on his eyebrow and he shifted in his seat so I couldn't._

"You know what, I was afraid I'd have to do this."  
_I got up and straddled him on the sofa so he couldn't move._

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Since you won't sit still I have to make you."

"I really don't see why I can't just leave--"

"Because it'll get infected. Why are you smiling?"

"Because you're cute when you're angry."  
_He said this full of the Weasley accidental charm.  
__They don't mean to be charming it just kinda happens, by accident_

"Right George right."  
_I took his chin in my hand and put the peroxide on his eyebrow. He flinched a bit but then he looked at me and smiled again._

* * *

Then he did something that confused me more then ever. He moved his hands up to my face and he kissed me. He kissed me long and hard. I could taste the blood from his lip but I didn't care. It was one of the best kisses I've ever received. I kissed him back. And then...

* * *

"JUST WHAT IN THE BLOODY HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!?!?!?!"

_I turned, still in George's lap to see a very red faced and angry Ron._

"Oh shite."  
_Was all George could manage to mumble between gulps._

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	8. Chapter Eight: I Stopped My Dreaming

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "I stopped my dreaming" is all Nico, not me.**

**Author's Note: Wow, I got a lot of reviews. Thank you all so much, it means the world to me. I'm glad you all like it. And I forget who asked this but yes a gimp is the same thing as a limp, I just used the word gimp because it sounded more belittling where as limp sounded like a wound. Sorry about that. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Eight: I Stopped My Dreaming**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Please never look back because you won't forget why you cried."-Daphne Loves Derby_

"Oh shite." Yeah, oh shite. That was all he could say. I slowly got off of George's lap. He got up and we both walked over to Ron, who was shaking slightly. Probably out of anger.

* * *

"Ron's it's not what it looks like."  
_What an over used expression._

"Oh right, Hermione it didn't look like my brother was--"

"She's right Ron; it isn't what it looks like. Well actually it kinda is, sorta, technically. Well you know how these things wo--"  
_He was rambling out of nervousness._

"George! Just shut up. Let me talk."

"Right, Hermione, right. You talk good thinking."

"GEORGE!"  
_I heard a whispered apology next to me.  
_"Now Ron let me explain."

"Go right ahead, what are you bloody well waiting for?"

"Well George and I were sitting outside and --"

"Humph. I'm sure you were _sitting. _There's a lot of things you can do while your --"  
_And with that George lunged at Ron. It took all my might to keep the two from each other. But I did it._

"JESUS CHRIST! WILL YOU TWO JUST STOP TRYING TO BEAT THE SHITE OUT OF EACH OTHER SO I CAN FUCKING EXPLAIN?!?!?!?!?!?"  
_The both calmed down.  
George sat down on the sofa. Ron stood his ground on the other side of it.  
_"Now, that's more like it. We're going to be civil adults because if I have to yell one more time the whole house will wake up and I don't think you two want a scene."  
_Both boys shook their heads  
_"And Ron if you say anything belittling or patronizing I will kick your arse myself."  
_George chuckled  
_"That goes for you too."  
_He looked disappointed that I wasn't taking sides.  
_"Now as I was saying George and I were sitting outside talking. We came inside. Ran into Malfoy. George and Malfoy got in a fight. George's eyebrow and lip were pretty badly cut so I took him back here to fix them up. He kept flinching when I tried to put the peroxide on them so I had to sit on his lap to keep him from moving. Then he kissed me.  
_Ron looked like a deer in headlights.  
_"And I kissed him back. That I believe is where you came in."  
_An angry deer in headlights._

_Ron eyed George with the most hatred I have ever seen in my life.  
__If I was George I would sleep with one eye open.  
_"Well, I don't believe you."  
_He huffed._

"Well you better bloody well believe her because that's what fucking happened."  
_George growled  
__Ron cracked his knuckles in anticipation. He wanted a fight.  
__George glared.  
__This was gonna be hard._

"Now listen you two. I know what you're both thinking. And there is going to be no sort of fight this evening. Not here and defiantly not now. Remember I'm not as strong as Fred and Harry and you both have at least a foot on me. Don't make me get between you."  
_Both boys growled.  
_"Unless of course you want me to go wake up Harry and Fred. I could always do that."  
_I made my way towards the steps then I felt two hands grab my shoulders. Two very different hands. I glanced behind me to see that Ron had leapt for my right and George was on my left._

"No. Don't do that."  
_They said in unison.  
Then they realized that both of them were holding me. There fear evaporated and their anger returned. I quickly stepped between them._

"Don't you bloody touch her you perverted backing stabbing cunt."  
_Ron just had to start didn't he?_

"What do you fucking well mean, perverted and backing stabbing? Where in god's name do you get them? Ya thick bastard."

_I then realized exactly how tall, broad, and different George and Ron were; seeing as I was almost plastered between them. I was holding onto George's arm behind my back so he wouldn't punch Ron and using my knee to keep Ron from pouncing George._

"Well hmm, you molest my best friend. And I don't think this is the time or the place to talk about backstabbing."

"First off I did not molest your best friend. I believe our kiss was very mutual indeed."  
_He looked down at me and smiled. Then back up at Ron and snarled again._

"And secondly you damn well brought up the back stabbing so you're gonna explain it because I have no fucking idea what you're on about.

"Who's the thick bastard now? And why the hell are you backing away? Scared George?"

"No I'm not scared. But if you get any closer Hermione's gonna suffocate. And for the record remember that swollen lip you had for two weeks over the summer? "  
_Ron muttered something about an unfair fight  
_"Come on Ron fucking explain. We don't have all goddamned night."

"What I mean to say is that you told me that you didn't like Hermione that way but you deliberately went behind my back and molest--"

"HE DIDN'T FUCKING MOLEST ME! IT WAS TOTALLY MUTUAL"  
_Jesus Christ.  
Stupid boys._

"Fine, fine, you went behind my back and err...did things with my best friend."  
_George snorted  
_"And that to me is back stabbing. Plain and simple."

"Alright fine, I did say that. But why are you so upset. You have a girlfriend remember? Or did Lavender drown herself in perfume or something?"

"For you're information arse, Lavender and I broke up yesterday."

_George's look of anger turned to sympathy and then exasperation as he slid into a chair by the fire. Ron took the chair opposite it. I curled up on the sofa.  
I couldn't go to bed now.  
_"Oh I didn't know. If I did I wouldn't have said that."

"You didn't know because we didn't tell anyone and you would've said it anyway."

"True."

"Now why did you kiss Hermione?"

_George's eyes wandered over to me, who was pretending to be asleep on the couch.  
_"I really don't know. I guess I was just caught up in the moment or something."  
_He thought for a minute as if to pick the right words.  
_"I mean Hermione's a really great girl. She's pretty and smart and funny. And well just great all around and I guess she got the best of me."

"What do you mean go the best of you?"

"Well I would've never kissed her. But tonight I did because well she got the best of me."  
_He shrugged_

"So you weren't going anywhere with that kiss tonight?"

"No, I don't think I was."

"You wanker, you fucking lead her on like that."

"I wasn't leading her on, I was gonna tell her it was a mistake but then she kissed me back. And well she's a damn good kisser."

"I know."  
_Ron said more to himself then anyone._

"What?"

"Nothing. So what are you going to do now?"

"I guess I'll have to talk to her."

"Damn right you will."

"Should we wake her up and have a chat or something?"

"I don't think she's been asleep long, we can try."

_They both loudly whispered my name and one of them shook me. I really hope my tears weren't evident._

"Hermione, George and I have to talk to you about a few things."

"Alright."  
_I yawned. I really was tired.  
_"Go for it."

"Well Hermione..."  
_George started. He was sitting next to me. Ron was pacing.  
_"About the kiss..."

"It's alright George. Don't worry about it."

"What do you mean?"

"It's no big deal really, just a little kiss."

"So you're saying it was completely platonic?"

"Yup."  
_I'm such a bad liar.  
__But he wasn't going to argue._

"Oh well then that clears everything up. Thanks Hermione."

"No problem. Are we done now?"

"Yeah I think we are. Ron?"

"Huh? Yeah. Let's get some sleep. Potions first thing tomorrow."

_We had all reached the stairs by now. I honestly can't tell you how I got there._

"Well boys goodnight. It was interesting."

_George chuckled  
_"Yeah it was. Night."  
_He walked up the steps_

"Night Hermione."

"Night Ron."

_I was at the top of the stairs now_

* * *

I crept into my bed and that's where I'm planning on staying. We must've been there for a while because according to my clock it's around one. I can hear muffled sobs underneath my own. Lavender must be up. Ten guesses why she's crying. The same reason I am. Fucking Weasleys. Fucking George. Fucking Ron. Bastards. I should've never had kissed him back.

I really don't know why I'm so upset. They really didn't say anything to hurt me. Even what George said about kissing me. I knew it was totally platonic. I knew it was nothing. (I actually believe myself now) I think its disappointment. I think a teeny tiny bit of me got my hopes up again. Felt something other then friendly. Especially when they started fighting over me. Again.

I hear a faint whisper coming from my room. It's getting louder.

* * *

"Hermione, why are you crying?"  
_She says this between snuffles_

"Nothing Lavender, it's no big deal. Are you alright?"

"Not really. I just can't believe he broke up with me."

"Lavender come here."  
_She walked over and got in bed with me.  
She put her head on my shoulder and cried._

"Oh Hermione, please don't tell him. I know you tell him everything but please don't tell him this."

"Lavender I do tell him everything but in...moderation. He won't know, I promise."

* * *

She stayed and cried for a while. I felt I should have been there for her and I tried to be. I hope I was. I've never been close to Lavender; even after spending six years together. There's just some things that girl's can bond over that boys would never understand. It was that thought that made me feel better.

I was being selfish and a boy. A very feminine boy. I was taking the boy way out. I was blaming everyone else but me but I was trying to fix everything on my own. I don't ask for directions.

Lavender's problem was much more important then mine was. Ron had been a right bastard when he had broken up with her. That was when I decided that I would give up. I'm giving up on boys. I don't care anymore. They can do whatever the hell they please as long as it has nothing to do with me. Especially if their last name happens to be Weasley. I'm going to stop dreaming, stop hoping, even if it's a teeny tiny tingle. You could never guess how much I failed.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	9. Chapter Nine: You're Never Gonna Get It ...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. The name Connor MacManus is from _Boondock Saints_ and is the property of Mr. Troy Duffy. "You're never gonna get it right "is all Brand New, not me.**

**Author's Note: As always thank you sooo much for the reviews and for those of you who read this. It makes me want to keep writing, so thank you all very much. I did notice that someone had a complaint of sorts about the cuss words, it's chill complaints etc. are as much accepted as praise is; but I just wanted to say that yes I agree, there are way to many curse words in it, but some parts of the plot in my story are based on real things that happened to myself and/or my friends and because I'm writing like that the dialogue matches that of myself and/or my friends(we curse like drunken sailors, it's a hard habit to break). I did however rate it PG-13(if I should have a higher rating let me know, I'll change it) but I will try to tone it down a bit, although I'm not promising anything because the use of those words is an extensile part of my vocabulary, even though I don't like it. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Nine: You're Never Gonna Get It Right**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_And I'm not so sure; if I'm sure of anything anymore."- Taking Back Sunday_

Well, yeah it's been a while. Sorry I got blasted with loads and loads of school work and essays...ugh. Not much has changed however since my last entry. As much as I wanted to forget about Ron and even George it has been extremely difficult. For one precise reason....

* * *

"Hey Hermione."  
_Someone peaked through the door to my dorm._

"Oh, hey Gin."

* * *

...the Weasleys are bloody everywhere. I can't seem to get away from them.

* * *

"Hermione, can I talk to you about something?"  
_She sat down on my bed._

"Yeah, sure, shoot."

"Shoot what?"

"Nothing, never mind, muggle expression. Anywho, go on."

"Well over the past month or so you seem really different. You seem to be thinking a lot about something but you won't tell anyone what it is."

"Ginny, it's no big deal; I'm just flustered over school work is all."  
  
_Ginny smiled a mischievous smile that could top the twins.  
_"Now see, that is a good reason and all, but I'm not gonna let go of the fact that it's complete and utter shite."

"No it's not."  
_Her smile turned into a Weasley glare.  
_"And even if it was how would you know what it's about?"

"It's not hard, Hermione. I see the way you look at my brothers."

"Just what are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about how every time I see you around George or Ron you get this far away look in your eye. It's creepy and sad."

"Do I really?"  
_I tried to take it back but she heard._

"Yes, you do. Now care to explain because I really didn't wanna have to go to Ron and/or George about this..."

"Alright fine, fine...I'll tell you."

"Oh and before you start...I can tell when you lie."

"Dammit."

"It's rather obvious anyway you burst into a complete fit of giggles, well come on then."

* * *

I told Ginny everything, well almost everything. I left out the part about the night George kissed me and the fight and all that, both fights actually, I left both fights out. And she already knew about me liking George so that cut a few minutes out of my story. I just told her how I was in love with Ron and how he must never ever know. I also told her how George was just a little crush but that I was strongly attracted to him but not so much anymore. She actually understood.

* * *

"Yeah my brothers can be right bastards, no wonder you haven't been yourself lately."

"Yeah, so there you have it. I love Ron."

_Just then the door opened and I heard a gasp.  
_"WHAT?!?!?!?!?"

"Oh Jesus Lavender. You scared me to bloody death."

_She walked into the room with her mouth hanging open. Then she looked from me to Ginny and then back to me again.  
_"You're...you're in love with Ron?!?!?!?"

"Well, yeah but Lavender he has no idea and I didn't do anything to destroy you're relation---"

"That's fucking brilliant! Simply wonderful!"

_It was mine and Ginny's turn to be shocked.  
_"You mean you're not mad?"

"Mad, of course not. I've been worried about you Hermione and now I just realized why you're down all the time. But now I need to know whole story."

"Ginny I can't say it all over again. You can tell her."

* * *

So Ginny told Lavender everything just as I had done. Lavender reacted just as she would any other boy story. She gasped, and giggled at all the right moments. And she promised with all her heart she wouldn't say a word, not even to Parvati. And you know Lavender does have an ear and mouth for gossip but when it's a secret she wouldn't tell a soul.

Wow what's it been a week almost? Yeah I think so, a week or so since I told Ginny and Lavender. Nothing has happened. Neither one of them told a soul. There's really no news either, well except this one thing.

Ginny is trying to set me up with a boy from Ravenclaw. He's a friend of her boyfriend, Michael. His name is Connor MacManus or something like that. He's cute, nice, and smart. I've talked to him in the library a few times. Plus he has this absolutely wonderful Irish accent. But I don't need any new boys right now. I've got my hands full with Ron and the occasional awkwardness between George and me. It is getting better though. But Ginny will stop at nothing, I tell ya.

* * *

"Come on Hermione pleeeeeeeeease."  
_This is what I get as soon as she sits down to lunch._

"No."

"Come on, don't you think he's cute?"

"Adorable, beautiful eyes as well."

"Ok, then. And you know he's smart."

"Right, I see him in the library all the time."

"And, he's nice."

"That he is."

"He has all the perfect ingredients."

"Ah, but you forgot one thing. His melting accent. Ooooh those Irish ones get me."

"Well then why not?"

"Because. The only boy I need to be thinking about is a certain one."  
_I head nodded to Ron who was deep in conversation with Harry, Seamus, and Dean.  
__Ginny and I went back to talking about frivolous things but I had to bring him up again.  
_"Do you think he'll ever find out?"

"Nah, not unless someone tells him."

"Yeah, and the only person who I think would tell him would be Harry."

"Yup."

"I'm more worried about Harry knowing then him."

"Ah ha! I've got it."

"Got what?"

"If you don't go out with Conner I'm going to tell Harry."

"Well I don't plan on going out with Conner so you better get ready to tell Harry."  
_I knew she wouldn't. She can be a wanker at times but never that malicious._

"Tell Harry what?"  
_Why do boys always pick the worst times to listen?  
He repeated himself.  
_"Tell me what?"

_Ginny and I picked this moment to burst out laughing. We do that when we have things to hide.  
_"Nothing, Harry nothing."

"No I heard my name. It's something."

"Yeah I heard his name too."  
_Since when did Ron stop being oblivious to things?_

"See Ron heard it. Come on if you guys are talking about me I'd like to know."

"Harry we weren't talking about you. Besides we can't tell you anyway."

"If you can't tell him then how about this; Hermione you whisper it in my ear and I'll tell him instead."

"No Ron."

"Come on, it's easy"  
_He leaned his ear in._

"Alright fine."  
_Think Hermione think.  
__Oh by the way I'm still laughing at this point._

"Well?"

"Oh well I heard a rumor that a little third year had a crush on Harry. I don't know who though."  
_I said it real fast and in the lowest whisper I could manage.  
__Whew!_

"Wow that is kinda funny, actually."  
_He chuckled_

"Ron come on tell me."

"Right, a third year has a crush on you but Hermione doesn't know who it is."

"Oh ok, well no big deal then."

"I told y--."

"That is so not what we were talking about."  
_Ginny gasped and held her hand over her mouth.  
_"Wait yes it was."  
_She really is like her brothers sometimes; well alright most of the time.  
_"Fuck, bugger Hermione I'm sorry."

"So you guys really were talking about me?"

"NO DAMNIT! We were talking about the boy I like."

"Who George?"

"No Ron, the secret boy that no one knows about who I happen to like a lot. A lot. A lot."

"Oh well then you can tell us."

"No."

"We can keep it in our little group. Come on, you tell us everything."  
_Ron put on his 'I'm a little boy whose is trying to bribe his mother into giving him a cookie' face.  
__Why does he have to be so cute?_

"Well Ron this is something I can't tell you."

"Come on. Are you afraid I'm gonna say something to him?"

"Sure, yes that's exactly it."

"Well if you liked this person wouldn't you want to date them?"

"Well yes but--"

"So you should tell them because they might like you back."

"Believe me Ron they don't"

* * *

And my lunch continued just like that. Ron bugging the shite out of me and Harry almost getting it out of Ginny twice. I knew he was going to get it out of her eventually, he's always been able to get secrets out of Ginny; so I did something extremely thick. I told her that she could tell Harry but that he was sworn to secrecy and if he told anyone he would have to give up one of his male...err... appendages. This caused a snowball effect. But when it rains it pours.

Harry kept his word he didn't say anything. The next two days Ron was sick in the infirmary. Fred and George tested one of their new products on him. Something about 'making your enemies sick' or something, I don't know. Anyway the second day that he was sick the lunch time banter started again. Harry just had to open his big mouth.

* * *

"So Hermione, you think you'll ever tell him?"

"No."

_Seamus jumped in.  
_"Who's she going to tell what?"

"Nothing."  
_Ginny and I said at the same time._

"Yeah come on you three have been talking about this for two days we want to know."

"Fred's right we should know."

_I looked at the eager male faces around me. Fred, George, Seamus, and Dean. A trustworthy group. They'd find out eventually.  
_"Alright fine. I like Ron, a lot."

"You do?"  
_I don't really know who said this seeing as I was bright red and looking at the little spot on my shoe._

_After I gained my composer I did manage to squeak this out._  
"Yeah and you're not going to say anything to anyone because you get the same threat I gave Harry."

"Yeah, mates I'm sure you want to hold on to your left ball too."  
_Harry must've really thought I was serious.  
I must be pretty intimidating when I have to be._

"Right then, we're keeping our mouths shut."

"Aye."  
_All four boys said this at once. And actually; I believed them._

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	10. Chapter Ten: Perfecting Loneliness

**

* * *

Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Perfecting loneliness"is all Jets To Brazil, not me.**

**Author's Note: Well as always thanks to everyone who reads this, and everyone who reviews, I appreciate it very much. I was some what disappointed in my last chapter. I'm sorry if you guys were too. I hope this one makes up for it. I'm also sorry for the length of the chapters, I realize that they're not that long but I end the chapters when I feel I should. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Ten: Perfecting Loneliness**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_It means little to you, but the world to me."-Tokyo Rose_

The boys kept their mouths closed. Ron knew something was up but he's too thick to think twice about it. George however, gave me a speech. We were walking out of the Great Hall when he put his arm around my shoulders (we were back to being platonic).

* * *

"So you really like Ronnekins, huh?"

"Yeah I really do. Never really stopped liking him; I guess."

"You tried that once didn't you?"

"Huh?"

"You tried it. You blokes went out like two years ago, remember?"

_I laughed. George didn't.  
_"Yeah, for like a....week."

"Point proven."

"I'm lost."

"Do you want me to draw you a map."

"That would be splendid."

"When you and Ron dated; it didn't last. It didn't work out the first time. So what makes you think it's gonna work out the second time around?"

* * *

I've never seen George this serious. This protective. Ginny has my sympathies.

* * *

"Yeah, but there's not going to be a second time; so why are we having this conversation?"

_We stopped walking; he bent his head a little so that he was looking into my eyes.  
_"Listen, Hermione. You're like a sister to me, and well...I just don't want you to get hurt."

"Dammit George. Now I'm gonna go and cry."  
_He laughed. I didn't. I was totally serious.  
_"Stop laughing. I'm serious. Thank you. What you said means a lot to me."  
_I hugged him and he picked me up off the ground a little bit._

* * *

We were friends again. He was like a brother to me again. I like it better this way, even if I am still attracted to him. 

Everything was going pretty good. Not only did everyone keep their word; but I got to tease Ginny mercilessly. Her being more mad over boys then I (which is hard to do); she developed a crush on Seamus. It was meaningless of course; after all she was still dating Michael. However, just the idea still gave me enough to patronize her every chance I got. I loved it. But she got me back of course, making little comments about Ron under her breath. Basically lunch was made up of me and Ginny whispering and then giggling like hyenas. It pissed the boys off a bit.

On Saturday we had a Hogsmeade visit. It's such a lovely village, it truly is. We lost Ron and Harry somewhere around the Three Broomsticks. They had spotted some girls. I'm just gonna leave it at that. Anyway. Fred and George left us at Zonko's of course so that just left Ginny and I. We were just walking around being girls which is always fun.

* * *

"Hey you wanna go in here?"  
_She said pointing to the Honeydukes door._

"Yeah sure. I'm always up for a stop in Honeydukes"  
_The door chimed open and we got lost in sweets._

"Ohhh Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans!"

"Eh, they're alright."

_Ginny looked at me like I was a blasphemer.  
_"You don't like Bertie Bott's?"

"Well yeah but only the red ones."

* * *

Let me explain...I have this weird thing where, depending upon certain candies, I will only eat the reds. An example of this would be if I get a bag of Bertie Bott's or something like that the only beans I eat are the red colored ones. The flavor doesn't matter or anything, I just like red candy. Same goes for Fizzing Whizbees. It's an odd habit I know, it's also very tedious because I have to take the time to pick out the red candies. But it is a Hermione-ism and I like it.

* * *

"Oh that's right I forgot. It hasn't been brought up in a while."

"Yeah Ron always had something to say about it."

"He really did have a problem with that didn't he."

"I think he just liked teasing me."

"Probably."  
_She chuckled_

"Wow, he hasn't done that in a long time."

"I suppose he hasn't."

* * *

I know this sounds thick but I kind of miss his teasing. It seemed too immature and maybe that's why I miss it. That whole growing up thing again. Damn growing up.

* * *

_I shook myself out of my nostalgic state.  
_"Maybe we should start back."

"Aye, it's starting to get dark."

* * *

We found Ron and Harry waiting at the train station for us.

* * *

"So what did you boys do today?"

"Stuff."

"Yeah Ron, I guessed as much. Care to elaborate?"

"Possibly."  
_He snuck a sly smile at Harry._

"Never mind. If you're gonna be that thick about it; then I don't want to know."

"I was going to tell you."

"Then tell me."  
_Why is everything an argument with him?_

"Me and Harry met some girls. We had a nice time."

"Oh, well good to know."

"Indeed."

* * *

Harry looked at me like he had seen a ghost. I don't know why. Yes, it bothers me that Ron has found someone else. Someone who isn't me. But it's his happiness that counts, right? I can't be jealous of someone who doesn't even belong to me.

Well another week has passed. And he still doesn't know. Well actually I'm not really sure anymore. He's been acting weird. Distant. He hasn't said a word to me since Sunday. It's Wednesday now. He knows. He knows something.

It was that Wednesday night where my confusion took a dive. I was in the busy common room lazily reading a book. Ron and Harry were still at quidditch practice so I got up and said my goodnights but a hand grabbed my arm right as I was about to go up the stairs.

* * *

"Hermione."

"Oh hey Ron."  
_He let go of my arm._

"Hey....um... I know you like me and I know you've had a crush on me for a while."

_I didn't know how to respond because I couldn't really talk and play it cool at the same time so I settled for...  
_"Ok."  
_Smooth...I'm so fucking smooth._

"I just wanted to tell you that I knew and it's not a big deal."

"Ron, I didn't say anything because I really like what we have and I didn't want to ruin our friendship."  
  
"Yeah, that's what I mean. You're one of my best friends and we can talk about everything. You don't find that very often."

"Exactly. I'm very lucky to have you as a friend and I just wanted to keep it that way."  
_Somehow I feel like I said that more in an attempt to convince myself rather then to convince him._

"I'm glad you think that also."  
_I nodded  
_"So stop telling Ginny secrets at lunch! I hate when you guys do that."  
_He chuckled. Damn him.

* * *

_

We were sitting on the stairs by that point. I hadn't even noticed. Just like he didn't notice my eyes watering. We were quiet for a while and then...

* * *

_I giggled. He looked at me confused.  
_"Actually, those secrets are pretaining to Ginny; but I'll try to cut back on them."

"Wait, what's that supposed to me?"

"That I won't tell them--"

"Not that. The thing about Ginny."

"Oh...well...our little Ginny has a bit of a crush. But you can't say anything because only me and Lavender know."

"Who is it?!?!?!?!?"

"That's the whole point of the whispering...it's a secret."

"Hermione, please tell me. I won't say anything; I'll just take the piss out of her. It'll give you some good laughs."

"I've been having a bit of fun with it myself lately..."  
_He cut me off with his signature little boy face. Dammit.  
_"But you have to swear that nothing will be said."

"I promise...I swear on quidditch."

"Alright."  
_I sighed  
_"Good enough....Seamus."

* * *

He laughed. He didn't stop laughing. He calmed down. We were quiet again. For a long time. Except this time around it was uncomfortable and we both knew it.

* * *

"Well, I think I'm gonna go."  
_I got up from the step._

"See ya."  
_He waved and walked back into the common room._

* * *

I laid in bed tossing and turning. I'm still doing that. I can't seem to figure this out. Something has stumped the great Hermione Granger and it's such a simple thing. Wait, no it isn't. It's really hard to figure out your own feelings. That's what I'm trying to do. Figure out how I feel. I'm so happy that he didn't freak out. That was great. And it was simply brilliant how he was fine with it. But then at the same time I'm kinda disappointed because he was so calm. His calmness was eerie. His calmness hurt.

I mean, I didn't expect him to sweep me into his arms and tell me he felt the same way. Fuck no. I didn't expect him to like me at all, so that's nothing new. It's the calmness that got me. It's the calmness and the things he said that got to me. He wasn't mean, or angry or anything. He was emotionless and monotone. And when your best friend who is usually very animated, talks to you after three days of non-communication in an emotionless and monotone manner, it's eerie.

Classes tomorrow are going to be strange. Sure tonight we were fine. We were fine until we stopped and thought and then we were uncomfortable. I don't want to be uncomfortable. I didn't want him to find out. But he did.

I woke up this morning dreading school.I just laid in bed for a while. I got up and dressed as late as I could without missing breakfast. I took a seat at the table. Not my usual seat between Ron and Fred with Harry facing me, but the seat four down from Harry. I didn't want to look at him, but I didn't want to avoid him either. It's very tricky for someone who is smoothly challenged. I looked up from my breakfast for two seconds to see him saying something to me. I couldn't hear him over all the noise from the Great Hall so I got out of my seat, tripped slightly on the bench (_he chuckled_) and walked up to him.

* * *

"The Chudley Cannons are playing the British Cup!!!"  
_That's all he had to say?_

"Wow Ron that's great. Are you going to go?"

"If I can. It's sometime in July."

"Cool."  
_And I went back to my seat, but I had to get up again and find the person who borrowed my potions book. _

* * *

It was strange. I knew it was going to be strange. He kept looking at me funny all day. This morning when I told Lavender about our conversation she became convinced that he liked me. Yeah sure. Ginny agreed with her. Bastards.

In History of Magic Lavender and I were sitting behind him and Harry giggling about something irrelevant. He kept turning around annoyed. It never bothered him before. But after class he asked me what we were talking about. The poor bugger is paranoid. So am I. I wish this wouldn't have happened. Why does it have to happen to me?

At lunch I was trying to avoid his eyes. I was late so the only seat left was my usual one right across from him. I didn't want to sit there. Not today. Not ever again. Seamus and I were having an ongoing conversation and when that wasn't happening I was keeping myself busy with homework. He and I talked a little, exchanged pleasantries. I laughed when he teased Ginny but that didn't make it any less uncomfortable.

I was staring into space when I heard a small sound in front of me. You know the sound that one single drop of rain makes when it hit's the ground? Well that was I sound I heard. I jumped out of my daze. I looked down at the table to see one single jelly bean. It was red. I looked up and there in front of me was Ron with a small smile playing at his lips; eating a small bag of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans.

* * *

_He spoke barely above a whisper.  
_"Here...I...thought you might like that."  
_He smiled a genuine smile._

_I smiled back.  
_"Thanks."

* * *

I popped the jelly bean into my mouth and looked at him again. He was already lost in conversation with Harry.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	11. Chapter Eleven: I'm Your Fair Weather

**

* * *

Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "I'm your fair weather" is all Jets to Brazil, not me.**

**Author's Note: I wanna thank everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews. I'm really glad you all like it and I appreciate the support. It seemed that quiet a few of you liked the last chapter. That's awesome because it's one of my favorites. I just hope you guys like this one just as much. I'm also sorry it's taken me so long to update. I've been drowned by schoolwork and Psats but I promise I won't abandon my story. I will finish it, if it's the last thing I do. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Eleven: I'm Your Fair Weather**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_You told me once that I made you smile. We both know damn well I didn't"-Alkaline Trio_

The jellybean thing got me. I told anyone who would listen, or would care about it. Lavender swore it was a sign that he liked me. Cho did too. Ginny just commented on how rare it was for her brother to be sweet. I, on the other hand, am more confused then ever! Why can't I just not over analyze things and be positive like Lavender and Cho, or just stick to the facts like Ginny. Damn subjective reality. So I suppose you're wondering what happened next. What's happening now? Well I'll tell you all about it but I don't think it's that big of a deal. Actually I'm just trying not to over analyze.

So the jellybean thing happened last Thursday. The rest of Thursday was just as weird and awkward as Thursday morning had been. Friday there was a quidditch match so I hardly saw Ron, or Harry, or any of my boys for that matter. They hibernate before a quidditch match I swear. Oh and for the record we beat the shite out of Hufflepuff. 150 to 20. Go Gryffndor.

Anyway back to my rant. The weekend was jam packed with homework and essays so I hardly left my room. I didn't even go to dinner on Saturday night. Well I did eventually get food but that's only because George dragged me from the common room to the kitchens. He has nothing to do when Fred is off wooing girls. Poor kid. So I really didn't get a chance to be around Ron until Monday.

I do however have some sort of dramatic weekend news....drum roll if you please...GINNY BROKE UP WITH MICHAEL!! Yes, yes she broke up with him. I'm not really sure why but I know she had her reasons. He was pretty good about the whole thing. He knew it was coming. So now she can flirt with Seamus all her little heart desires.

Ok now I know I'm rambling, sorry. Moving on to Monday. It wasn't odd but only because he went out of his way to make it alright. I got to the Great Hall for breakfast before he did. Actually I was there before a lot of people. So anyway I'm sitting at the table with Harry, Neville, Parvati, and a first year or two. The rest of the table was empty. So where does Ronald Weasley park his arse? Well right next to me. Not next to Harry who was on the other side of me. Not Neville across the table. Not near Parvati or any of the first years. Oh no. He sits right next to me. And starts talking immediately.

* * *

"Good morning Hermione."

"Oh hey Ron."

"How was your weekend? I didn't see much of you."

"Yeah I had mad amounts of work. I did see the game though. You did good."

"You think so?"

"Yeah, you're getting better Ron."

"Thanks. You work on the Potions essay?"

"Yeah. It took me ages."

"You pick some random potion then?"

"Eh, I guess. It was some sort of advanced sleep drought."

_He chuckled.  
_"I did that one too."

_I laughed_.  
"I was ready to murder Snape by the time I was finished."

_He smiled.  
_"I'm always ready to murder Snape."

* * *

So that was the morning. As the day went on he wasn't so jovial. Tuesday was the same. It amazes me how a boy so full of angst can be overly jovial just so it's not weird between us. Today, Wednesday, he was better. Still happy and overly friendly (for Ron); but it wasn't like he was doing it out of force anymore. I like him happy; it's cute.

I also found out yesterday that Seamus likes Ginny just as much as she likes him. _sigh._ Young love, so sweet. I believe he's taking her to the Hogsmeade visit next weekend. I hope all goes well for them. Poor Seamus though. He got himself in a spot of trouble the other day. There's a Hufflepuff named Susan Bones, who all last year, said some very rude things to Seamus. Nothing big but there's been a bit of animosity between the two. During the summer Seamus found a picture of himself that Colin Creevy had taken. In the background was Susan. He magically wrote the words "Fat Cow" in bright yellow letters over her picture. Somehow she found the picture, made a copy, and reported it (four months later, mind you) to McGonagall. Seamus had to see her after classes yesterday. McGonagall threatened to owl his mother but Seamus hasn't received a Howler yet so he doesn't think she did. It's been quiet the Hogwarts scandal.

Other than the Susan/Seamus fuss and Ron's positive attitude; all has been normal. The boys are still just as cute. The girls just as giggly. And I'm just as confused.

It's been a little bit of a while, well a week or two but that's a while to me. I can't believe it's the middle of December already. Time goes by madly fast. Christmas holiday is in two weeks. Mad I tell you.

Everyone for some unknown reason has a date to Hogsmeade this weekend. Everyone. I believe Connor MacManus (remember him?) is going to accompany me. Now don't get any ideas. This is not a date. We were talking in the library one day about how much it sucked that we didn't have anyone to go with so we decided to go Christmas shopping together. I promised to help him pick something up for his girlfriend and his sisters, if he helped me with all the boys I need to shop for. And yes, I wrote girlfriend. He has a muggle one back in Ireland. Her name is Grace, he showed me a picture and she's lovely.

So I'm assuming your wondering about dear old Ronald? Well we're fine now I guess. Still being overly friendly and all but whatever. Actually though, this morning on the way to breakfast we had an unusual conversation...

* * *

"Hey Hermione..."

"Oh hey Ron."

_He walked a little faster to catch up with me.  
_"Are you going to Hogsmeade?"

"Yeah."

"Are you taking anyone?"

"Um, yeah I think Connor MacManus is going to go with me."

"Oh."

"Are you going?"

"Yeah, I think I am."

"Are you taking anyone?"

"I don't think so."

* * *

And that was our odd conversation. You may wonder why it's weird well I'm going to tell you.

A. Ron knew I was going to Hogsmeade. He had asked me twice this week already and saw me sign up on the damn sign up sheet.

B. That "are you taking anyone?" question was just way to un-Ronnish. He never says shite like that.

And C. He sounded disappointed when I said I was going with Connor, when he knows damn well that there is nothing going on between Connor and me. He thinks Connor's a puff for fuck's sake.

So yes the confusing saga continues. Especially since I'm still crushing on George. Now I know I said we were platonic and all but I don't know. Well we are still platonic, because if anything I am pretty good at hiding my feelings, well most of the time. He's just so...well I don't really know. Ginny of course being her, picked up on it right away. Lavender knows too, damn girls pick up on everything. Actually I think Cho knows too. Dammit.

Well Hogsmeade was wonderful. I had a great time with Connor; he really is a nice guy. I picked up something for everyone too, I absolutely love Christmas time. I got a letter from my mum today. I'm going home for Christmas this year, but I have to be right back on the train Boxing Day because there's a dentist convention in Germany that they must attend. Bugger. I'm going to be all alone for a few days because everyone is spending Christmas at home this year, including the Weasley clan, and Harry. Ah, well I'll get a lot of work done.

* * *

"Hey Hermione. Why so glum?"

"Oh hey Ron. Eh. I just got a letter from my mum, she wants me home for Christmas but I have to come back on Boxing Day because of some convention."

"Wait, hold on. Didn't I ask you yet?"

_My heart stopped. Corny I know, but whatever.  
_"Ask me what?"

"I knew I forgot something."  
_He hit himself on the forehead.  
_"Mum, told me to invite you to spend Christmas at the Burrow. "

"Really? That would be wonderful."  
_I smiled_

"Simply lovely. I'll tell Mum you'll be joining us on Boxing Day then."

"Ron, why are you smiling?"

"When you smile, I smile."  
_He said this full of sarcasm. _

"Ah."  
_That's a load of shite, but it made me feel special._

* * *

Christmas was wonderful. I spent a lot of time with my family even though it was for only for few days. I got a bunch of wonderful of books. They should last me a couple of weeks.

Mr. Weasley, Ron, Harry, and Ginny came and got me right before my parents left on Boxing Day. I'm actually in the Weasley's backyard right now. Sitting under a tree as it snows. We go back to Hogwarts tomorrow and here I am somewhat avoiding everyone. I guess you wanna know what happened huh?

Last night; sometime around 11 o'clock I heard muffled whispers coming from the twin's room next to Ginny's where she and I were sleeping. The Weasleys' had a full house that night. Charlie, who hadn't made it for Christmas had arrived yesterday morning. Mrs. Weasley didn't know he was coming. I don't think I've seen that woman happier in my whole life, but then Bill went to Diagon Alley and came back with his girlfriend. Molly Weasley was beaming. Yeah so anyway...I heard muffled whispers coming from the twin's room next door.

* * *

"Oi! Charlie! Get your arse out of my bed."

_Then I heard a grumbled response  
_"My bed now, Georgie boy. Find another one."

"I tried. Everywhere. Even the couch is taken. Ow! Fred why'd you throw that pillow."

"Because you won't shut your face!"

"Oi! Shut the fuck up!"

"Sorry Bill, Charlie, Fred."  
_When he got to the hallway he said...  
_"Bastards."

* * *

Then the door to Ginny's room opened, but I kept my eyes shut tight. They actually started watering because I was holding them so damn tight.

* * *

"Ginny? Hermione?"  
_He whispered just enough to be heard. His voice was softer then when he was talking to the boys._

_Ginny sleeps like she's dead so of course she didn't answer. So I did.  
_"Yeah?"

"Uh...Hermione is it alright if I slept on the floor tonight? Everywhere else seems to be occupied. Even the bloody sofa."

"Yeah, sure, I guess. Do you need a blanket or anything?"

"Nah. I got it, thanks."

* * *

I heard him make his bed on the floor. He kicked something, probably clothes, or books, or both. Then he tripped on something. Finally, I heard him lay down.

* * *

"'Night Hermione."

"'Night George."

* * *

George Weasley was sleeping on the floor right next to my bed. My god damned bed. And yet, I forced myself, with all my might, to keep my eyes shut. According to Ron, all Weasley boys slept in their boxers, no matter how cold it was, or their surroundings. The last thing I needed was to see whether it was true or not.

Then it happened. I had the most horrible dream, of all the dreams I have ever had. Voldemort came back, and he was stronger then before. He killed everyone, slowly, painfully, and right in front of me. Then he turned to me and told me he had saved the best for last.

I woke up gasping for air and crying. I had hoped that no one had heard me. Ginny didn't (not unusual), but he did.

* * *

"Hermione...Hermione are you alright?"

"Just a bad dream."

"Are you still crying?"

"I think I might be. What time is it?"

"Somewhere around three, I think. But are you alright?"

_I snuffled  
_"I will be. I was just scared is all."

_He got up and sat next to me on the bed.  
_"Here, scoot over. Go on. I'll stay here 'til you fall asleep, okay?"  
_I moved over and nodded. He put his arm around me._

___  
_"Thank you."  
_I mumbled. I was afraid to talk because I knew I'd just start crying again._

"Wanna tell me what your dream was about?"

"I don't think you'd be able to comprehend what I say."

"I can, don't worry."

* * *

So I told him. I told him everything and, of course, I cried. I just put my head into his shoulder and cried. And he just sat there and held me, like nothing else mattered. And at that moment in time nothing did matter. Well nothing mattered to me, anyway. Nothing at all. Nothing registered. I was just a girl who was crying and being held by a boy. Not long after we both fell asleep.

I was woken up by a jumble of things. And this time, everything mattered. The first thing I heard, in my incomprehensible state was a knock on the door and then Ron.

* * *

"Hermione, are you awake yet? It's almost noon. Mum sent me up to get you."

* * *

And before I could answer someone else did. I figured it would be Ginny, but it wasn't. It was a low gruff voice, one that defiantly was not Ginny's.

* * *

"Bugger off Ron!"  
_Then he grumbled._

_

* * *

_

Then I realized that the arm that was slung over my stomach wasn't mine at all. It was muscular, masculine and well, nice. But that's not what mattered; what mattered was who it led to. Out of the corner of my eye I followed the arm to wherever it led, and there it was. There he was. The arm's owner. And it was GEORGE?!?!?!?!?!?!?

I thought the night before had been a dream. Guess I was wrong. I really didn't have time to think though, because the door suddenly and violently burst open and all I heard was Ron shout...

* * *

"BLOODY HELL!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?"

* * *

Then I heard a voice, the voice that I did not want to hear. Especially since one of her sons was standing in front of my bed looking very much like a red fish; and another one of her sons had his arm wrapped around me. WHILE I WAS LAYING NEXT TO HIM IN THE BED!

* * *

"Ronald what are you on about? There is no need to sho-- GEORGE ARTHUR WEASLEY GET OUT OF THAT BED THIS INSTANT! RIGHT NOW!"

* * *

Her roar sounded similar to that of a mother lion. That's what made me take my gaze from George's arm. And that's what made George finally wake up and realize the situation he was in. He got up and out of the bed slowly. He was shaking slightly as he walked toward his mother. Hell I was shaking and she hadn't even said anything to me yet.

* * *

"And just what do you think your smiling about, George? "  
_She was being so loud she gasped to catch her breath._  
"What in god's name where in doing in Hermione's bed? WITH HERMIONE?!?!?!?"

* * *

Then he did something I have never seen anyone do when faced with the wrath of Molly Weasley.

* * *

_He stood up straight, stopped shaking, and looked her straight in the eye.  
__If she was Medusa he would've turned to stone in a millisecond.  
_"Mum. There was no where to sleep. All the beds were full. So was the sofa. Hermione and Ginny's room had some floor space. I asked if I could sleep on the floor. Then in the middle of the night Hermione had a nightmare. She was really upset. I was gonna lay in bed with her 'til she fell asleep but I must've fallen asleep too. And that, Mum, is what I was doing in Hermione's bed, with Hermione."

* * *

Wow, if I could've moved or had any guts at all I would have applauded him. At that point everyone (everyone being the entire house minus Mr. Weasley who was at work.)looked at me trying to hide myself in the covers. If only I could disappear. But Mrs. Weasley looked right into my eyes. It was a straight shot and I swear I saw her smile. But it was over just as quick as it had happened.

* * *

_Then she looked at George again.  
_"Humph."  
_She walloped him in the back of the head. He flinched but only slightly.  
_"Get dressed, the both of you and go down to breakfast. Hurry though, because Hermione, you're going to help me clean the kitchen and George, you're to shovel the snow from the walkway. The entire walkway."  
_We we're both smart enough to accept our punishments without argument._

_But of course Ron had to say something. Well the poor boy was still as red as a cherry and breathing heavy.  
_"But Mum, you can't let George off that eas--"

"Be quiet Ronald! It was all a big misunderstanding. Right George?"

"Aye, Right Mum."

"Right Hermione?"

"Right Mrs. Weasley."

"But I hope you both understand that even though you're responsible children; things could have err... happ--"

"Mum! Stop right there. We get it. We messed up. Nothing happened. Look Hermione is wearing the same thing she was in when she went to bed last night."  
_Why did he have to say that? Why? He was smart up until that point.  
I got even redder and more embarrased then I already was._

"Yeah, but she could have always --"

"Shut it Ron."  
_He glared at Ron like I have never seen before.  
__And Ron actually stopped talking and stepped back from his brother._ _And from the conversation._

"Boys, boys. It's over now, problem solved. Everyone downstairs. And yes Ronald, you are included in everyone. George, Hermione get dressed. Go on, hop to it."  
_George walked back into Ginny's room.  
_"George, get into your own room."

"I'm just getting my blanket, Mum."

"Alright, dear."  
_And with that she walked away._

_George went and got his blanket and pillow from the floor.  
_"Listen, Hermione I'm sorry."

"No, George, it's all my fault. If it wasn't for that horrid nightmare..."  
_I trailed off._

"You were upset. It's understandable."

"Thank you. You know, for being there for me. It was really nice of you."

"Eh, no problem. Glad I could be there."  
_He paused.  
_"Well then, best get dressed."

"Right."

"Bye then."

"Bye."

* * *

WHAT IS GOING ON? This morning was so odd, so surreal. Especially the way Mrs. Weasley reacted so well. And why hadn't Ginny caused a scene when she had woken up. I know if I found my (hypothetical) brother in bed with my best friend I would flip. But she didn't. Why?

I did however notice something positive, that doesn't need a confusing over analyzation. I noticed, as George smiled and left the room, something I had never noticed before. George Arthur Weasley looked gorgeous in blue and white striped boxer shorts.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	12. Chapter Twelve: Holding On Forever

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Holding on forever" is all My Chemical Romance, not me.**

**Author's Note: As usual thanks to everyone who reads and to everyone who reviews. It means so much to me. I'm really glad a lot of you liked the last chapter. I'm trying to write as much as I can, but it's so hard with all the school work I have. I'm actually home sick right now, so I had a little time while I was lying on my sofa. I also noted that a lot of you are rooting for Ron. I'm rooting for both boys so even I don't know who Hermione's going to end up with. All I can say is that you keep reading and be patient. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twelve: Holding On Forever**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Can't pretend that you're nothing special."- Funeral For A Friend_

I'm sitting alone in the common room right now. We got back to school about two days ago. Ron hasn't said a word to me the whole time we've been here. I am however on talking terms with everyone else. Even though Ginny still won't tell me why she didn't say anything. There's still a bit of underlying awkwardness, but that was to be expected. It's snowing outside. I can see the flakes falling. I absolutely adore when it snows. It's so magical. Even before I knew magic really existed I always looked at the snow as magical. Mrs. Weasley had to yell at me several times to come in because I refused to leave the snow as long as physically possible. It wasn't very long. It's also quiet late out. Quidditch practice is going on but everyone else is asleep. The Slytherins always have dibs on the pitch so the only time Gryffindor can practice seems to be the worst times. The portrait hole just opened. Practice must be over but I will not look. I will not give Ronald Weasley the satisfaction.

* * *

"Um... Hermione, this has been taken too far. We have to talk."  
_What the fuck is he talking about?_

"Ron, I didn't take anything anywhere but if you want to talk go right ahead."  
_I finally looked up. The only people left in the common room were Fred, George, and Harry. Fred just shoved George up the steps. Harry followed slowly._

"Alright."  
_He sighed and sat in the chair next to me; looking at the floor.  
_"Can I ask you a question?"

"You can ask me anything, it's whether or not I answer that should be the question."

_He chuckled. My comment wasn't meant to be funny. He sighed and looked serious again. Dreadfully serious.  
_"Did you shag George?"

"WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?"

"Did you sha--"

"I heard you the first time. I can't believe you would ask me something like that."

"I just have to know, Hermione. Did you shag George?"

"For fuck's sake no. No I did not shag George. Where in hell did you come up with that idea?"

"Well I don't know I put the puzzle together."

"George didn't say anything to you did he?"

"Not really. We're not exactly talking. He did tell me to stop being a bastard towards you though."

"When did he say that?"

"During practice."

"Oh."

"Yeah. So what did happen between you two?"

"Everything he said to your mum. He was telling the truth, you know."

"Oh. Well he is George."

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"Well..."  
  
"I'm all ears."

"Well you know about his reputation."

"What reputation?"

"Jesus, do I have to spell it out for you?"

"If you want me to understand anything you're saying, then yes."

_He sighed_.  
"Alright. His reputation with, well girls. He shags them and then just kind of stops talking to them."

"Yeah. That."

"So you knew then?"

"Of course I knew. Everyone knows that."

"Well why didn't you say anything then?"

"Because I was hoping that wasn't what you were talking about."

"I just don't want you to get hurt Hermione."

"I'm not going to get hurt. I don't even like George anymore."

"Really?"

"Really."  
_I was lying through my teeth._

"Alright then. Glad we talked."

"Me too."  
_Not really._

"I'm going to take a shower then go to bed. You should too."

"Yeah I know. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

* * *

In case you're wondering I did not go to bed. I went down to the kitchens and got a strong cup of tea and some toast. Now I'm curled up on a sofa in front of the fire in the common room. I can't sit near the window anymore right now. For some reason the snow is making me sad. But honestly, I don't think it's the snow.

We're not as close as we used to be; he and I. I thought it was because he had Lavender but now I know that that's not it. We used to tell each other everything. I haven't told him "everything" since last summer. I miss him. I miss being sick and him visiting me in the infirmary just to tell me that Seamus got smacked by some Hufflepuff girl. I miss his hugs in the hallways and his "Hermione can I talk to you"s because he was worried about his dad's job or his mum's sanity. We were like siblings he and I. Now it feels like we're more like acquaintances. I've tried so many times to blame it on other people. I've blamed it on Lavender, Harry, even Ginny. But it's my fault. Deep down I know it is. We've grown apart and it's all because of us. No one else.

Oh yes, it's time for another Hogsmeade visit. My sarcasm should be noted. Since everyone started dating I've begun to loathe Hogsmeade weekends. I mean sure they're nice and fun and all that but not as much as they used to be. This time I believe I am going to be wandering around the lovely village by myself. Why you ask? Well I'll tell you. Ginny and Seamus, Harry and Parvati (I know?!?!?!?), Ron and Padma (yet again?!?!?!?!?), Connor's sick, Lavender and some Ravenclaw boy, Both the twins have dates, Cho's meeting Rodger Davis and so on and so forth. Hence me being alone. Oh well sometimes its nice being alone. I'm not very convincing am I?

Hogsmeade does look lovely this time of year. I'm sitting on a bench while the snow falls. It looks like one of those little Christmas villages muggles put up. With the trains and all. And yes, like I said yesterday I'm all alone. I did get some shopping done. Picked up a few new books and supplies. At Christmas I promised my cousin that I would get her some candy so I did that as well. Besides Malfoy coming up and harassing me I've been by myself. Left alone with my thoughts.

* * *

"Granger."  
_He sat down on the bench next to me._

"Weasley."

"You have this very suspicious aura about you."

_I laughed.  
_"George Weasley only you would say that."

"Well you do."

"Where's your other half?"

"Who knows? Not me. And honestly I really don't fancy knowing."

"Weren't you two on a double date or something?"

"Yeah, well sort of."

"Care to elaborate?"

"I was getting there. Fred's _wonderful girlfriend_ apparently has a _wonderful friend_ that I just had to meet. Well I met her. She was somewhat... blah. So I ran away and here I am. And there she is chatting up that girl from Slytherin."

"Interesting."

"I thought so. What about you? Waiting for anyone?"

"Actually no. I'm all by my lonesome today."

"That's an outrage."

"Isn't it?"

"Well I'll make you a deal. It's..."  
_He looked at his watch.  
_"Only 1:30. We still have a couple hours to kill."  
_I sighed.  
_"Exactly my feeling. So here's my deal. You hang out with me so I don't have to go back to Ms. Wonderful and I accompany you so you're not alone."

"Hmmm... well I don't want to be a bother plus I was pretty content being alone."

_He laughed.  
_"It didn't look that way when you were talking to Malfoy."

"George 1, Hermione zip. Well... All right. Probably funner with you anyway."

"Funner?"

"More fun."

"Good. I thought the great Hermione Granger was losing her touch."

"Don't push it Weasley."

_He threw his hands up in mock exasperation.  
_"I wasn't pushing anything, just merely stating a fact."

_I giggled despite myself.  
_"Damn you."

"Thank you. I love you too Hermione."

"Bite me."

"That can be arranged you know."

"I'd like to see you try."

"If you insist."  
_He went to grab my hand. But I pulled away._

"Fine. Point proven. You win."

"Good. We off then?"  
_He got off the bench and stretched._

"Where are we off to?"  
_I got off the bench and dusted the snow off of myself._

"I care not ma'lady."  
_He bowed._

"Me neither."

"Well, if you're going to be difficult."  
_He huffed then smiled at me.  
_"How does wandering around aimlessly then grabbing a butterbeer sound?"

"Lovely."

"Alrighty then. Off we go."  
_We walked a little ways around Hogsmeade. We passed Malfoy who sneered.  
_"Hermione?"

"Hm?"

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Go for it."

"What was Malfoy talking to you about anyway?"

"Oh, he was saying something about "The know it all Mudblood not having a date" or something. I honestly wasn't listening."

"Oh. Sorry."

"It's no big deal. I'm used to it by now.

"He still shouldn't treat you that way."

"People shouldn't do a lot of things, but they do them anyway."

"True."

"Besides, he knows that if he drastically hurts my feelings he can always become a bouncing ferret again."

_He laughed.  
_"Ah ha. I see. Well then we all had better be nice to you."

"That you should."

_The day continued.  
We walked around for awhile and then I heard a shrill that sounded remarkably like a banshee.  
_"GEOOOOOOOORGE! There you are."  
_She came running towards George and me._

"Shite. Just play along. Please?"  
_He whispered this very fast.  
__I nodded.  
__He grabbed my hand and put on a very fake smile.  
_"Fiona. Hi. Sorry I lost you."

"Oh George, it's quiet alright."  
_Her sugary tone could make even Umbridge stop dead in her tracks.  
__It was disgusting.  
__She finally noticed me. Her glare burned.  
_"Who's your little friend?"

"Oh silly me."  
_He hit himself in the forehead.  
_"This is _my _Hermione."  
_Then he put his arm around me and squeezed my shoulder._

"Your Hermione?"

"That she is. Right Hermione, darling?"

_I was trying so hard not to laugh.  
_"Right you are sweetie."

"Oh. Well your brother didn't say anything about _her._"  
_She practically spit out the last word._

"I suspected as much. Fred forgets things very easily. Especially when helping out a girl."  
_He chuckled to himself.  
_"I truly apologize for the misunderstanding though."

"Well it's alright, I suppose. I'm sure there will be a next time."

"Right."  
_He looked like he was fighting to keep his smile in place.  
_"Well I think we're going to go grab a butterbeer. Did you want to join us?"

"No. I have some things to do."

"Bye then."  
_He grabbed my hand again and we walked away.  
_"Sorry, I had to get rid of her somehow."

_I couldn't hold the laughter back now.  
_"It's alright. It was my entertainment for the day. She really didn't seem all that bad though."

"You didn't hear her giggle."

"I see. But come on... 'darling?'"

_He opened the door to the Three Broomsticks and we walked in.  
_"It was the only thing I could come up with that wasn't totally grotty. Would you have preferred something along the lines of 'honey pie.'?"

"No that's quiet alright."

"Told you. Table by the window?"

"Sure. But do you honestly think she believed that?"

"Darling."  
_He chuckled.  
_"You're giving her too much credit. She's not exactly the brightest ghost in the cemetery."

"Well, you have my sympathies then. But if you don't stop calling me 'darling" Malfoy isn't going to be the only bouncing ferret around here."

"Fair enough."

* * *

Just then the door to the Three Broomsticks opened and in walked Ron, Harry and their respective dates. George saw them then looked at the table and began fiddling with the handle to his mug.

* * *

"Hey Ron look there's Hermione."  
_I heard Harry say._

"Oh lets say hi."  
_One of the girls said. I couldn't tell which one._

"Yes lets."  
_Said the other one._

* * *

All four of them walked over to the table with Harry practically dragging Ron. George looked up and said hello then look right back at the table. Ron huffed. He said hello to me but ignored George completely. The girls and I made small talk then they left to find a table with Harry and Ron following close behind.

* * *

_I could hear George grumbling under his breath.  
_"You guys still not talking then?"  
_He looked up at me somewhat confused.  
_"You don't have to answer I was just wondering."

"No, it's alright. But yeah we're not talking."

"Oh."

"It really does bite, ya know. But neither one of us is going to apologize or talk first so..."

"Yeah, I know whatcha mean."

"I'm sure you've had your fair share of excommunication where Ron is concerned."

"Aye. That seems to be his favorite thing."

_He laughed.  
_"It's every Weasley's favorite thing. We must have a stubborn gene or something."  
_I laughed. He smiled at me. It was a very curious smile._

"What?"

"Nothing."

"No what?"

"You have a cute laugh, is all."

_I turned red.  
_"Thanks, I guess. I've always kind of hated it."

"It's original. I've never heard anyone else laugh like that."

"Oh. Well thanks."

"Your welcome."  
_There was a bit of awkward silence but then we were fine. After a while of talking George said...  
_"Bugger, it's getting dark out we should be heading back."

"Right you are."

* * *

We left and began walking back to school following a giant crowd of students.I tripped a bit and he grabbed my hand to catch my fall. He never let go.We got back to school faster then I would have liked.He let go of my hand.

* * *

"Have I had your hand since we were in Hogsmeade?"

"I think so."

"Right. Sorry. I didn't even realize it"

"It's okay. I didn't notice it either till you said something."

"That makes me feel a bit better."

"It should. It's the truth."

_We walked into school.  
_"Well Granger, this is where I leave you. Thanks for hanging out with me today."

"Anytime. It was splendid."

"Splendid huh? I'll have to remember that."  
_I punched him. He chuckled then sighed.  
_"You just had to go and burst my bubble didn't you?"

"Yup."

"I believe the score stands at Hermione 3, George 1."

"I thought I only had two."

"You got another one because that punch kinda hurt."

"That's what you should remember."

_He rolled up his sleeve a bit and looked at his arm.  
_"I think the bruise that's forming will be memory enough."

"What bruise? I don't see any bruise."

"The proverbial bruise. The bruise on my ego."

"Oh. Well I can give you a bruise on your arm if you like."

"As tempting as that offer is I'll pass."

"Good choice."

"Ok I really have to go this time. I have a meeting with Fred about the store."

"Oh, then I shouldn't keep you."

"You can keep me all you want. But I don't think Fred would appreciate it."

"Me neither. Well goodnight George."  
_I turned him towards the steps. And pushed him._

_He laughed.  
_"Goodnight."

* * *

I stood there for a while and watched him walk up the steps. Then I felt someone bump into me.

* * *

"Sorry."  
_I turned to look at the person I said this too._

_It was a laughing Ron.  
_"Geez Hermione get out of the way."

"Oh it's only you."

"Who were you expecting, your knight in shining amour? Because I think he's down the hall."

"Very funny."

"I thought so."

"So how was your date?"

"Fun. How was yours?"

"I wasn't on a date."

"Don't gimme that. I saw you and George remember, I said hi to you."

"That wasn't a date."

"Well what was it then?"

"Me and George walking around Hogsmeade."

"Date."

"Bugger off."  
_I turned and began walking up the steps._

"Fine. I'm sorry, don't huff away like that."

"I wasn't huffing."

"Just like you weren't on a date, right."

"Right. Summary of this conversation. Ron's date was fun. Hermione wasn't on a date and doesn't huff."

"Cheeky."

"Thank you."

"Anytime. Wanna walk me to dinner?"

"Sure. But I have to know whether this is a date or not?"

"Hmmm. Can I get back to you?"

"Of course. You know I wasn't serious right?"

"Yeah, I just wanted to give you a taste of your own potion."

"Who's cheeky now?"

"CoughHermioneCough"

"Wanker."

"Thank you."

"Are we going to dinner then?"

"Lets."  
_He took my hand and we walked into the Great Hall._

* * *

That was that. It's getting harder and harder you know, being in love with two brothers. Two very different brothers. But they're both so wonderful. So lovely. And I absolutely hate how my feelings towards George are only a little ways from my feelings towards Ron. I don't think I could love anyone the way I love Ron, but George is gonna get pretty damn close. I hate being fickle.

And you know, they both had to hold my hand today. Not that it meant anything but it happened. I felt like I could have held on forever. Actually I think I've been holding on forever. I've been holding on to them. Holding on to my feelings for them. I keep trying to tell myself that they're nothing special. But they are and they will be long after I let go.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	13. Chapter Thirteen: We're Growing Up Too F...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "We're growing up too fast" is all My Former Self, not me.**

**Author's Note: As always thanks to the reviewers and readers. I also want to congratulate and thank ****PinkTribeChick**** for being my 50th reviewer; that's so awesome. And yet again I know a lot of you are wondering who Hermione's gonna end up with. I'm actually wondering that too. Hehehe. I felt the need to be a little evil there. I hope you all keep reading. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Thirteen: We're Growing Up Too Fast**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Just the smell of summer can make me fall in love."- Modest Mouse_

Thank god I finally got you back! Ginny thought I spent too much time writing so she abducted my notebook because "it's so annoying." It's the middle of March now. Although nothing really exciting or dramatic has occurred. Let's see... George and Ron made up sometime around the beginning of February. Mrs. Weasley sent a howler to both of them. If she didn't they probably still would be ignoring each other; just out of spite.

I haven't overheard anything either. I've been good about my eavesdropping addiction. I felt I should try not to do that anymore, because I always end up hearing stuff I didn't want to know. It's been nice not getting hurt. I swear to god though, everyone knows something that I don't. They've all been acting somewhat suspicious. But I'm too preoccupied with studying for exams to investigate and/or overanalyze. Everyone else is getting preoccupied with that too.

Next week is Easter holiday. My parents and I are going to visit some of their friends in France. That should be lovely. We go there all the time but I never tire of it. Ginny told me she'd report any drama, news, or occurrences. Not that she'll have anything to report.

It's been pretty boorrrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiinnngggggggg (Sid and Nancy anyone?) around here. Ron, Harry, and I would usually be trying to solve some Voldemort mystery but no Voldemort equals no adventures. I'm actually starting to miss them, well a little anyways.

* * *

"Hermione?"

"Yes?"

"Are you still going to France?"

"Yes Ron, I'm still going to France."

_He huffed.  
_"Why"

"Because I happen to like France."

"Fine, be that way. But you don't know what you're missing."

"You're right, I don't. So you can tell me all about it on the train back to Hogwarts."

_Harry chose to cut in.  
_"When did you get so cranky?"

"Harry mate, when is she not cranky?"

"I'm not cranky when presented with an opportunity to hex someone. I'll give you a hint who that someone is. It starts with a Ron and ends with a Weasley."  
_Harry was red with laughter._

_Ron was red with embarrassment.  
_"You know a simple sod off would have worked fine."

"I know. I just felt like confusing you."

"Well you didn't."  
_He crossed his arms and huffed again._

_I blatantly ignored it.  
_"So Harry I'm almost finished with your study guide.

"Thank you so much. I really need it this year."

"Don't I get one?"  
_Ronald, Ronald, Ronald._

"Possibly."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Possibly is an adverb meaning something that may come about or be done."

"An adverb? Granger you're impossible."

"At least I'm not confused."  
_I smiled my cocky smile._

"Oh just sod off."  
_He stomped away to the sounds of Harry and me laughing._

"Well aren't you two affectionate."

"I don't need your sarcasm, Harry."

"Sorry, I couldn't hold that one back."

_I laughed.  
_"It's alright. I'm just boggled down; I shouldn't take it out on you guys."

"You know you really don't have to make us study guides."

"I like making them and besides they really do benefit me too."

"You don't need to study Hermione. You're the smartest witch in our year. Maybe even in Hogwarts."

"And yet I still can't get over simple boys like them."

"Them?"

"I said that out loud didn't I?"

"Yup."

"Dammit."

"So who's them?"

"Well you know one but I'm not telling you the other."

"Come on Hermione, please."

"No."

"A hint?"

"Nope."

"A teeny tiny clue?"

"Do you want this study guide or not?"

"Fine, fine I'm done. I think I know who it is anyway."

"Just keep telling yourself that."

"Ron's right. You really are impossible sometimes."

"I know but that's why you love me."

"Ding we have a winner."  
_He got up from the chair where he was sitting.  
_"You know, Hermione I really don't understand Ron's whole deal but George is as good as guy as Ron is."

* * *

It took me a couple minutes to register what he had said but when I did he was long gone.

I spent a lot of my holiday thinking about what Harry had said. I dunno, I guess it just really got to me. I mean Ron's his best friend. I just didn't expect him to say that I guess. Especially about Ron and George. And how did he know about George. I told everyone I got over him ages ago. Am I really that transparent?

The days are getting warm again. I'm sitting outside under a huge tree. Ron and Harry are sitting next to me playing chess. Ginny's _cuddling_ with Seamus... so cute. And Fred and George are huddling by the lake. Probably new ideas for the shop. Mrs. Weasley made them close it until they finished school. She was pretty mad about them leaving last year.

George is so cute when he's concentrating. His forehead is furrowed and he's hunched over slightly reading something. He's biting his lip and a strand of hair is in his eyes as usual. I can see him trying to blow it away. He really is handsome, you know.

Ron too is concentrating. He's surveying the chess board. He's resting his chin in his hand while the other hand taps lightly on his knight. He makes his move and takes Harry's pawn. A small smile spreads across his face but then it's back to his stance surveying his next move. He's handsome too but differently then George.

Everyone thinks the Weasleys look a like. And they're right. They all have the same characteristics and things but their different too. Even Fred and George are different in some way. George has wide bright green eyes. They always look like their dancing with laughter. Fred's eyes are a hazel color. They're not as wide as George's either. George's hair must be a little longer too because it's always in his eyes and Fred never seems to have the problem. George has a little mole on his neck too that Fred doesn't have. Its really pathetic that I know these things but I do because they're the little things I like about George.

Ron looks more like Bill then any other Weasley. He's tall and skinny, awkward sometimes. His hair's long like George's but he sweeps it to the side. I don't even think he realizes he does it. It's a nervous habit. His eyes are a deep, dark blue. They look sad sometimes. But they always have a twinkle. The Weasleys all have a twinkle but Ron's stands out more. Maybe it's just me.

My sixth year is ticking away right before my eyes. Nothing has changed really. It's almost May and I'm still wondering the same things I was wondering in September. Wow, for some reason that makes me feel ignorant. Confused. Clueless. It's coming to a close and I've done nothing about anything, anyone. I've always wondered why I was put in Gryffindor because my bravery and courage seem to be waning. 

Last night was Fred and George's graduation. I don't think I've ever seen Mrs. Weasley happier or Mr. Weasley more proud. I guess when they left last year everyone thought that was it. That they had given up and would never make up for it. But in true Fred and George fashion they managed to surprise us all. Actually I'm proud of them too. HOORAY FOR FRED AND GEORGE!!!

I can't believe I'm on the train now. I know I haven't written much since after Christmas. I've had so much going on with exams and everything I just couldn't find the time. Nothing important or worth wile happened anyway so it probably would have been more babble then usual.

But now I'm heading back to London. Going back to being a muggle. I love coming home but I always feel like I'm a different person when I do. Ohhh Exploding Snap! I must play. It's a Hogwarts tradition.

I'm home lying in my bed. My room looks so foreign every time school ends. So different. So unusual. But sometimes it's a nice change. A welcome change.

My parents gave me some absolutely awesome news before I went to bed. WE'RE GOING TO AMERICA FOR THE SUMMER!!! I've always wanted to go there and now I am. I'm going to miss everyone so much but if all goes well I can spend the last few days of holiday at the Burrow. Then it's right back to Hogwarts.

This is my last summer as a Hogwarts student. Time goes by so quickly doesn't it? It feels like yesterday I was just a nervous first year anticipating being sorted. Wondering about what would happen. What going to Hogwarts would lead to. Everything went by so fast. It still is. Time moves faster then a Nimbus. So how come I always feel like I'm going in slow motion?

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Nose Over Tail

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Nose over tail" is all Alkaline Trio, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks as always to everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews. I appreciate any comment I get. I wanted to let you know that I'm going to skip around a little from now on with dates and such. If I didn't do that this would turn into a very redundant story. I hope you all don't mind. Well Enjoi!**

**P.S.  I was gonna wait until later to post this chapter but I'm in a very good mood... A. Because I got my school ring tonight, even though it's like three sizes too big it's muy pretty and .... I just got back from a Reel Big Fish show!!! Plus it's 12:39 a.m. and I'm too hyper and full of ska to go to bed... but if you ever have a chance to see Reel Big Fish I recommend it... they're amazing. Anywho... just thought I should share**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Fourteen: Nose Over Tail**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Like a plane crash that never hit's the ground. I fall in love with you. I'm nose over tail for you."- Alkaline Trio_

I can't believe I forgot you. America was great though. We stayed in New York City which is simply lovely. So many beautiful buildings and stores and everything. There was even a little wizarding village right around SoHo. I also got a little bit of sun and my hair's a little lighter. I always liked how I look when summer's over; all sun kissed and highlighted. I would kill to go back there I really would. I would even live there but I'd miss London too much. Sometimes dreary rain is better then warm sunshine. But whatever moving on...

I'm sitting against tree in the backyard of the Burrow. A great quidditch game is being played out in front of me. Everyone is playing their usual positions except Ginny who has been assigned Chaser; much to her dismay. She's not too shabby though. Sometimes I think Ginny should have been a boy but then she surprises me and starts talking about how "absolutely adorable and romantic" Seamus is. It can be kinda sickening sometimes but she listens to me ramble so I listen to her. That's what friends are for.

Tomorrow we're going to Diagon Alley to get our books. I can't believe my 7th year starts in two days. It seems so surreal. Everyone that was a head of me when I came to Hogwarts is gone now. They've grown up and moved on. I don't want to do that. I wish I could stay at Hogwarts forever.

Diagon Alley is one of those places muggleisms just don't make up for. I miss it so much all through the year. I mean Hogsmeade is just as wonderful but I get to go there so much more then I do Diagon Alley. So there I was this afternoon walking about with the people I missed all summer.

Aside from getting our supplies we went to the twins' store today. It was the first time I've seen it. In the window they painted the name only they bewitched the letters to change from yellow to red every time someone walks by.

When you walk inside all you see are brightly colored packages. It's covered wall to wall with their products and inventions. It's impossible to see the floor because of all the people that are in there. Fred and George look so happy. I never approved of their joke shop ideas but now I can't picture them doing anything else. They simply wouldn't stand for it anyway. Ron, Ginny, and Harry helped them stock and set up over the summer so they weren't looking around like I was. Some one tapped me on the shoulder and I turned to see a beaming George Weasley.

* * *

"So Hermione, whatcha think?"   
_He was bouncing on the balls of his feet and had his hands behind his back. He looked like an over grown six year old._

"I think its lovely George."

_He looked shocked.   
_"Do you really?"

"Yes I do."

"Even after all the times you agreed with my mother."

"Even after that. This makes you guys so happy and I never believed it but now I can see it."

"Well thank you Ms. Granger."

"You're welcome Mr. Weasley."   
_A little boy came over and tugged on the hem of George's t-shirt. George looked down then lowered himself so he was eye level with the little boy.   
_"What can I do for you sir?"

_The little boy giggled.   
_"I wanna get something off the top shelf over there but I can't reach."

_George looked over to where the little boy was pointing.   
_"Hmmmm."   
_He scratched his chin.   
_"That does pose a problem doesn't it?"   
_The little boy nodded.   
_"Alright I'll see what I can do."   
_He stood up to his normal size. I don't even reach his shoulders._ _He looked at the little boy again.   
_"Gimme two seconds okay?"

"Yes sir."

_George saluted the boy then turned to me.   
_"Duty calls."

_I laughed.   
_"So I see. We're probably heading back home soon anyway."

"Thank you so much for coming in."

"No problem I really wanted to see it. Are you gonna be at dinner tonight?"

"I don't think so but I'll see you tomorrow."

_The little boy huffed next to George._

"I better let you go."

"Yeah."   
_He bent down a little and gave me a hug.   
_"I'll see you later."

"Bye."   
_I looked down at the little boy and ruffled his hair.   
_"Sorry for hogging him."

_The little boy giggled.   
__As I was walking away I could hear him talking to George.   
_"Was that your girlfriend?"

_George laughed.   
_"Unfortunately no."

"Oh. She should be."

"Well that's up to her isn't it?"   
_The boy must've nodded because I didn't hear him answer.   
_"So what do you need me to get?"

"It's right over here."

_Ron walked over to me.   
_"Hermione we're leaving."

"Oh okay Ron."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, everything's dandy."

"Ready to go then?"

"Lead the way."

* * *

I looked behind to see if George was still around. He was holding the little boy up so he could pick out what he wanted from the shelf. You know I'm not really keen on little kids. They kind of annoy me but the way George was with the little boy made me smile and I rarely smile at little kids.

Wow, wow, wow. That's all I can say. Something big has happened. Something huge. I can't decide whether it's good or bad but I'm going to tell you about it anyway.

I was having some trouble sleeping. I was tossing and turning to no end. After a while I was going to see if Ginny was asleep but my watch said it was 2:14 so I didn't think that would have been a good idea. I couldn't stay in bed though. I just couldn't. So I put a sweatshirt on, because for some reason the Burrow is always cold, and crept down into the kitchen for some tea. I didn't expect anyone else to be awake.

* * *

"What are you doing up?"

_I jumped.   
_"George, don't do that! You scared me."

"You scared me too you know. Normal people aren't wandering around their friends' houses at this hour."

"You're wandering the house."

"A. it's my house, B. I'm not wandering; I'm sitting and C. I never said I was normal."   
_She smiled so wide he looked like the Cheshire Cat. His cheeky smile._

"Fine, you win as usual."

_He bowed in his chair.   
_"Did you need something?"

"Yeah I couldn't sleep so I thought I'd make some tea."   
_I began searching the kitchen for a kettle which seemed to be M.I.A.   
_"Where's the kettle?"

"Hermione, sit."   
_He motioned to the chair across from him. Then he conjured up a cup of tea.   
_"You're in the wizarding world, remember?"

"Well obviously, I just forgot that you can do magic outside of Hogwarts now."

"It is rather odd isn't it? Me being able to _legally_ use magic."   
_I laughed.   
_"By the way how's the tea?"

"Wonderful. Thanks. And George, if I'm bothering you I'll go back upstairs. It looks like you're doing something important."

* * *

It really did. The table was covered in parchment and George was covered in ink stains.

* * *

"Oh no. You're fine; I'm just adding up some numbers for the store. I like to do it the muggle way and Fred's not too good at it so... here I am.

"Alrighty then."

"So are you excited for school to start?"

"Eh, yes and no."

"Ah the dreaded 7th year sorrow."

_I giggled.   
_"So you felt the same way then?"

"Yes ma'am; both times."

"It's just so strange thinking that this is my last year at Hogwarts."

_He chuckled.   
_"It'll get worse, don't worry."   
_I sighed.   
_"Just look at it this way. You've lived almost half your life at Hogwarts. It's wonderful and you don't want to leave; but there are so many other things that are just as wonderful outside of those walls. There are things you would never be able to do in Hogwarts and people you would never meet. It's sad but it's kinda nice as well. Bittersweet if you will."

"Wow Mr. Philosophy."

"I try."

"When you think about it like that it does give it a more positive light though."

"It helps."

* * *

We talked a little more about random things and then it was very quiet. George was working on his stuff and I was just sipping my tea. It wasn't the awkward kind of silence either. It was comfortable and nice.

* * *

_I looked over at the parchment he was writing on.   
_"You added wrong?"

_He looked up. There was an ink stain on his nose.   
_"Huh?"

"You added wrong and there's ink on your nose."   
_He tried to wipe it away but he just got more ink of his face.   
__I got up and walked over to him.   
_"Here, lemme do it."   
_I spit on my finger a bit and wiped the ink off.   
_"There as good as new."

"Thank you. Now where did I add wrong?"

_I pointed to a spot on the parchment.   
_"Right here. It's supposed to be a six not a seven."

"Oh right. Stupid me; now I have to go back and fix it all."

"Don't worry I'll help you."   
_I leaned over his shoulder and took his quill. I crossed out a couple of the numbers and re wrote them._

"Hermione?"

"Hmmm?"

"Go back and sit down."

"I'm bothering you aren't I? George I'm so ----"

"It's not that. It's just..."

_I sat back down in my original seat.   
_"It's just what?"

"Well.... Um... I... I...Can't do this anymore."   
_He gulped._

"Can't do what?"

"This. Whatever this is that's between you and me."   
_He gestured to me and then to himself._

"What's between us?"

"Hermione you and I were never really close friends until this year and you're great and I love our friendship and what we have but I just can't do it anymore."

"I'm sorry George for whatever I did."

_He sighed.   
_"You didn't do anything. It's me. I well I.... I like you."   
_He said the last part really fast.   
_"... a lot. I like you a lot but not in the friendly sense of the word. Actually it's probably the farthest thing from friendly. Okay that was the queerest sentence I have ever said ..."   
_He chuckled nervously. I just looked at him confused waiting for him to finish.   
_"Oh right, moving on... I know you don't see me like that and it's perfectly fine but for me it's just too hard to be friends with you when I want so much more. I'm a selfish person and I just can't do it."   
_He exhaled as if he had been holding his breath that whole time._

"George I really don't know what to say. But as a friend I must respect how you feel and if you don't want to be friends anymore that's fine. I understand."   
_I got out of my chair and stretched.   
_"I'm going to go to bed now though; big day tomorrow."

"Right. 'Night."

"'Night."

* * *

Sleep? The thing I most defiantly didn't want to do was sleep. I had to overanalyze the situation like I usually do. I was laying in bed thinking about everything; everything that happened between us; everything he said when I heard someone knock softly on the door.

* * *

_He whispered.   
_"Hermione are you asleep?"

* * *

I really wanted to not answer and pretend but I just couldn't do it.

* * *

"No I'm not."

"Can I come in for a minute?"

"I guess."   
_Why did I have to be so nice?_

_He walked over to my bed and sat down at the end of it. I sat up.   
_"Look I shouldn't have said those things to you. I'm such a prat for telling you all that. I feel so horrible about it. I'm sorry I was so brazen but I had to tell you. You had to know."   
_He got off the bed and looked down at me.   
_"I just wanted to tell you that and say sorry for everything. Just forget everything I said because it's not important. I just went on some unnecessary tangent. I'm so sorry. Goodnight."   
_He left the room before I could say anything.   
__I heard him walking back down the steps. He must've been pacing around the front hall. Then he started talking to himself.   
_"I'm such a goddamned git. 'Farthest thing from friendly.' What the hell was that? Poor girl probably thinks I'm mad and now I'm talking to myself. This is just great. Stupid, stupid mad George. You're in love with the girl and what do you do? Act like an arse. I really need to stop talking to myself."

* * *

After that all I could hear were his footsteps in the kitchen.

I heard him go to bed hours ago. The sun's starting to come up I can see it when I look out the window. I'm so confused and I shouldn't be. Everything he said was simple, straight, and to the point but I'm not like that. I can't overanalyze it and I can't dissect every little bit because he was honest. I don't even know how I feel about it. Should I be happy that he's "in love" with me? For some reason I'm not. Knowing that just puts another obstacle in my life that I really don't need. I feel like I'm stuck in a plane crash. It never stops it just keeps going.

I should probably get some sleep now. It's going to be a long day. Maybe if I'm lucky I can sleep on the train. Maybe when I wake up I can figure some things out. Maybe is an awfully indecisive word.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Did You Forget Somethin...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Did you forget something? You forgot to say goodbye." is all Evergreen Terrace, not me. And Colin Farrell belongs to well, himself.**

**Author's Note: I want to thank everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews it means a lot to me. I'm glad a lot of you liked the last chapter. I also know a lot of you are torn between George and Ron. All I ask is that you be patient and wait only a little while longer. One or two more chapters longer I promise. Thanks again. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Fifteen: Did You Forget Something? You Forgot To Say Goodbye**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Angels have no thoughts of ever returning you; would they be angry if I thought of joining you; gloomy Sunday."- Billie Holiday_

So I should be ecstatic right? Jumping for joy? One of the boys I love loves me back; or so he says. Every fiber of my being should be filled with happiness, right? Well of course nothing is ever easy.

I'm sure you're wondering why. I myself am wondering something too. I'm wondering what is bloody well wrong with me. I already know the answer though I'm just trying to avoid it. It's simply not working. I always want what I can't have. Everything has to be a challenge for me or I become uninterested. This works with boys too. I could be madly in love with someone but as soon as they show interest I'm done. I make everything hard on myself I really do.

I don't care who it is, but I always go for the one I can't have. If Ron asked me to marry him tomorrow I'd say no, just because he'd be attainable. Hell if Colin Farrell proposed to be tomorrow I'd probably turn him down. Well Maybe not. He is Colin Farrell after all. _Sighs._ I need to stop thinking about Farrell and get back on track. One more thought... _sigh..._ Okay all better. Where was I?

Aah yes. My issue with boys. Well I think you get the gist. No matter what happens I always make things hard on myself. I probably should work that out.

I probably should work a lot of things out. My feelings for George would be one thing. Yes I like him. Yes I think I'm in love with him. Do I love him as much as I love Ron? Yes and no. I love them both so much but so differently. I really can't describe it. I can't even grasp it. Next question being if I love him so much why didn't I say anything in the first place?

We'll I'll tell you why. I didn't know what to say. The first chance I had I was dumbfounded by what he said. Simply discombobulated. The second chance, when he came to apologize, I didn't say anything because I think it would have made things worse. He obviously wanted to forget the whole thing and I don't think it would have done him or me any good if I blurted out "I like you too." Besides he didn't really give me a chance. And lastly a relationship of any kind really wouldn't work. He's of legal age, out of school, running a business, and a train ride away from me. Would that cause some difficulty? I don't think any boy is worth that much trouble period. But who really knows?

I'm still pondering that question. That question I asked at the end of October... who really knows? It's getting close to December now and I still haven't figured it out. I now see my life as one gigantic chess board everyone around me is moving in their own way but I'm the bishop; I can only go diagonally. When all one can do is avoid everyone else it causes a lot of problems.

I know what I really want now though. I really want to give George a chance but I'm not sure if I would. There's something blocking my emotions and that something is named Ron. I don't think I'll ever be able to do anything about George because of Ron. I'm not waiting for him or anything because I know it'll never happen; it's just that I love Ron so much that I compare every other boy to him. George is a great guy. He's cute and sweet and smart and so many other things but he's not Ron. I really need to get over it. I need to just be friends with Ron but its utterly impossible.

I'm stuck in the middle of the sea and I'm drowning. The deeper I get the darker things become. I'm caught in a tsunami and I can't get out. I'm drowning in myself. I'm the cause of all my problems.

It's nearly four in the morning. Sleep just doesn't seem to be an option. Thank god it's Saturday though. However, it's also a Hogsmeade day. The last thing I want to do is go to a lovely village, with lovely people. I want to stay in my bed and wallow. I like to wallow. I've been doing it a lot lately. Maybe I'll just skip Hogsmeade. Yeah I like that idea. Well I'm gonna try to sleep again, my eyes are burning and my head is heavy. Goodnight.

Well I had a full intention of skieving out of Hogsmeade today. Too bad nobody else liked that idea. I was practically dragged out of bed sometime around nine by Ginny, Lavender, and Parvati. Apparently I "absolutely had to go." We met Harry, Ron, and Seamus in the Great Hall. When we got to the village we all kinda separated. Seamus and Ginny, Lavender and some boy, and Harry and Parvati simply disappeared leaving Ron and myself up to our own devices.

* * *

"Where do you suppose everyone went off to?"

"They're probably finding someplace to snog. Shouldn't you be with Padma?"

"Nah. She and I really don't.... fit?"

"Yeah I know whatcha mean."

"I guess it's just you and me then."

"You guess correctly."

* * *

We just wandered around for a while. Talking and laughing. We hadn't done that in a while. It really was nice. And as usual everything became difficult.

* * *

_I stopped in front of the bookstore that was next to Zonko's.   
_"Can we look in here a sec?"

_Ron looked as if he was about to be executed.   
_"Err.... Umm... Zonko's?"

_I laughed.   
_"Look, you go in Zonko's I'll go in the bookstore. Come in there and get me when you're finished."

_He looked like a little boy at Christmas.   
_"I like the way you think."

"Ron, just go into the shop."

"Right. I'm off then. I won't be long."

"Take your time."

_He waved. I waved back.

* * *

_

As much as I liked spending time with Ron I was glad he didn't go into the bookstore with me. I'm so neurotic about books that it's better if I'm alone when in my element. So you know I was wondering around the bookstore when I backed up right into someone. I turned to apologize and he was the last person I expected to see.

* * *

"Oh, I'm sor---"

"Hermione?"

"George?!?!?"

"Aye. What are you doing here?"

"I was gonna ask you the same thing."

"I asked you first."

"Ron wanted to go into Zonko's I wanted to look in here. We compromised."

"So you're not alone then?"

"For the time being I am, but not for the whole day no."

"Oh."   
_He looked down at the book in his hands. His cheeks had started to redden._

"What are you up to?"

_He held up the book.   
_"Just picking up something to read."

_I took it from him.   
_"You're reading about Brighton?"

_He chuckled nervously.   
_"Well yeah. I've always wanted to visit there. I don't really know why; guess I just liked the name."

"You're going there then?"

"No. Just content reading about it. Have you ever been there?"

"Can't say I have."   
_I flipped through some pictures in the book.   
_"But it looks like a lovely town."

"Yeah I've wanted to go there ever since I can remember but now I'm just happy looking at it. No body else knows this of course."

"Your secret's safe with me. Why don't you go though?"

"There's too much going on with the shop and the family. It's just a little day dream that's all nothing special."

"We should go one day."

"That would be nice."

"It would."   
_I pushed a strand of hair out of his eyes.   
He blushed again. _

_

* * *

_

Just then Ron came almost bounding down the aisle.

* * *

"Hermione ready to--- George what are you doing here?"

_George shoved the book behind his back.   
_"Nothing looking for some joke books. The usual."

"Thought so; just making sure."

_George nervously chuckled again.   
_"Right well I better be getting back to the store. It was nice seeing you two."   
_He waved._

"Bye George."

"See ya George."

* * *

And then he was gone. My day continued with out any other interruptions. Except of course the ones in my own head. I just couldn't stop thinking about him. I'm still thinking about him now. The way he smiled when he saw me or the way his hair kept falling into his eyes or how he hid the book from Ron. I think there's a lot more to George Weasley then meets the eye. His mysteriousness makes him even more attractive then he already is.

Something must really be wrong with me. I spent a whole wonderful day with Ron and what am I rambling about? His brother. The brother I only saw for fifteen minutes tops. The brother whose smile still won't leave my head. Am I wrong to wish Ron's was there instead? Or am I wrong because a part of me doesn't want George's to fade away?

Well since my last entry nothing much has changed. Ron's been acting a little odd lately but he always has his odd moments. I was invited to stay at the Burrow for the Christmas holiday which is next week actually, but I declined. I don't think I can deal with another holiday full of Weasleys. God only knows how many more crushes will come out of two weeks at the Burrow. And that's all I need right now, to fall in love with another Weasley.

Why can't anything ever go right? I came back to Hogwarts today. It's the last Sunday of Christmas holiday. Classes resume tomorrow but I'm not sure if I'm going to resume with them. Something very devastating happened over the holiday. My grandmother died. She was sick and not the simple kind of sick either. She didn't have a cold, or the flu. She had cancer.

My grandmother was dying and I wasn't with her; I should have been but I wasn't. My mum and dad thought it would be better if I stayedin school so I could keep my mind off of it. I guess they had a point. They think that I would've rather remembered her alive and healthy then sick and frail. I would have rather seen her then remember her though. I knew she was sick but I didn't know she was dying; wasting away while I was here obsessing over frivolous things like marks and boys.

I haven't told anyone. I don't really want them to know. They all know something's wrong, something's off. They keep asking but I won't tell them. Here I was almost a month ago thinking my life was over because of two stupid boys. But now I really am drowning. I'm losing faith as my sea gets darker. I'm losing hope the deeper I get. I'm about to hit bottom and I'm running out of air.

What I really want right now is to get some tea and write a letter to her; a letter I'll never send. I'm too upset to do it without tea. I'm afraid to get out of my bed though. Do you remember the monsters that scared you as a kid? The one in the closet or under the bed? Well they're back. I'm so upset that I think there's one under my bed right now. A nonexistent monster is lurking under my bed. Just waiting for me to get out; to place my feet on the floor just so it can pull me under.

I'm practically shaking now because of everything that's going on in my mind. I'm going mad I tell you. I'm supposed to be the strong one; the wise one; the dependent one but I'm crumbling under the weight. I'm waning and everything is going down with me.

I don't think my grandmother was the only one dying. I think I'm dying with her. It's just happening more slowly and less painfully. I sound so selfish but I'm being honest. This is the only place where my honesty can dwell. This notebook full of so many emotions and memories. I'm going to go to bed now and I hope when I wake up tomorrow this is all a dream. I hope I wake up eleven years old again; naïve to everything. I hope that every night. I lose more hope every morning.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Get Me Passed This Dead...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Get me passed this dead and eternal snow" is all Bright Eyes, not me.**

**Author's Note: As always thanks to everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Sixteen: Get Me Passed This Dead And Eternal Snow**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Somebody's waiting for me at home."- The Walkmen_

I was excused from classes on Monday. Professor McGonagall told me I could take the whole week if needed but I declined. I can get it together. I can suck it up. No I can't.

I was sitting outside in the snow for I don't really know how long. I love it so much but it was aggravating me and yet I stayed. Everyone was in classes so I was all alone. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to be or not. I loathed the human race but there was a part of me that just wanted to be held. I tried to not cry but it wasn't working. The tears were falling slowly down my cheeks and the tip of my nose. I think a few of them froze there.

I heard the snow crunch under someone's weight behind me. I didn't look. I figured it was Snape coming to tell me off for skieving class and being outside. I thought if I didn't see him he couldn't see me. My logic hasn't been working well. The person was coming closer. I knew it was a male just by the way they walked. They took short and heavy steps and then they stopped. He put his arms on my shoulders, pulled me off the ground, and turned me around to face him. He wiped a tear away with his thumb. He looked confused.

* * *

"Hermione what happened?"   
_I tried to back away but his grip on my shoulders kept me locked there._

"You should really be in class."

"So should you but I'm not here for a lecture."

"Then go back to class."

"No Hermione not until you tell me why you haven't spoken a word to anyone. Not until you tell me why you haven't been to any of your classes at all today and why you're sitting in the snow crying."

"Ron just go away."

"No."

"Ron please."

* * *

The tears had started again. I had them under control for a while but it was useless now. He must've noticed because he just hugged me. It wasn't a friendly hug; it wasn't even a Ron hug. He pulled me close to him and held me so tight I felt as though I were glued to him. I cried for a while. I heard the bells ring and dismiss the classes he must've to because he grabbed my arm.

* * *

"Come on lets get you out of here."

* * *

He wrapped his arm around me and walked me quickly through all the secret passages him and Harry discovered. We only ran into a handful of students and for that I was grateful. We reached the common room before everyone elsethen he took me up to his dorm. I had started crying again by that point. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him again. I felt so safe; so secure. After a while I looked up at him to see him looking down at me. His face was filled with confusion and pity.

* * *

"Are you going to be okay?"

"I will be. I'm so sorry Ron."

"Why are you apologizing? You didn't do anything."

"I made you skip class and you have to stand here and hug me and everything."

"Hermione."   
_He pulled me away from him and looked me straight in the eye.   
_"Shut up."   
_He hugged me again._

_I snuffled.   
_"My grandmother died the day before we came back to Hogwarts."

"Oh. She was sick wasn't she?"

"Yeah. I just didn't know she was that sick."

"Sometimes people surprise us. Why didn't you tell anybody?"

"I don't think I could deal with all the sympathy. You know the 'I'm sorrys' and the 'She was a great person.' It's so insincere."

"I know that's why I didn't say it."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Being you."

"Is that a good thing?"

"Of course it is."

"You feel a little bit better?"

"A tad."

"Wanna go down there?"   
_He head nodded to the door._

"Not really. Honestly all I want to do is go to sleep but I'm avoiding my dorm."

"Are Lavender and Parvati really that bad?"

"You have no idea. They think I had some torrid affair over holiday and are 'broken hearted.'"

_He laughed.   
_"Well what did you expect? Their minds only run on a few tracks."

_I laughed then yawned.   
_"It sucks too cause I've gotten no sleep since about Friday."

"You know what..."   
_He pointed to his bed.   
_"... it's all yours."

"Ron I couldn't."

"Yes you can. You just pull down the covers and jump in."   
_He demonstrated.   
_"See simple and easy."   
_He got up and walked back over to me,   
_"Your turn."

"Where would you sleep?"

"My bed."

"No Ron we would get in so much trouble and what would people think?"

"Get your mind out of the gutter. You didn't let me finish. I have quidditch practice and detention tonight. I'm not gonna be able to get in bed until at least midnight. You sleep here until I get back then I wake you up and you go to your own dorm."

"I don't know it seems a little dodgy."

"Are you kidding? It's perfect. We'll cover you in Harry's Invisibility Cloak. No one will even know you're here."

"No I really don't think..."   
_My yawn cut me off._

"Hermione Jane Granger bed. Now."

"Alright Molly I'm going, I'm going."

"I could always take my offer back you know."

"Did I say Molly? I meant Ron because well you're Ron."

"That's what I thought. You want pajamas?"

"That would be nice but you can't go into the girls dorms remember?"   
_   
He handed me a little pile of clothes.   
_"The t-shirt wasBill's and the pants are an old pair of mine that haven't fit since first year. Not in the best shape but their comfy."

"Thanks. Turn around."   
_I changed while he looked at the wall with his hand over his eyes.   
_"You're good."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

_He turned around a little red in the face.   
_"Alright well you get some sleep and I'm going to head off to dinner? You want me to save you any?"   
_He covered me with the Invisibility Cloak._

"No thanks just some sleep."

_I peeked my head out._ _He reached the door and smiled.   
_"Welcome home Hermione. Sweet dreams."   
_He winked and shut the door behind him._ _I was out like a light.

* * *

_

**--UnreadLetters**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Friday I'm In Love

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Friday I'm in love" is all The Cure, not me.**

**Author's Note: In a very repetitious fashion thanks again to everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews, it simply makes me day. I'm glad you all liked the last chapter and as promised it is now the moment of truth. Hermione is going to pick! However, the story is nowhere near over. I was even thinking of writing and epilogue/sequel deal. So I will shut up now so you can read. Oh and HAPPY THANKSGIVING! It's a time to celebrate when we took things that weren't ours but hey… the mashed potatoes are just way too good. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Seventeen: Friday I'm In Love**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Hey little girl; I wanna be your boyfriend. Sweet little girl; I wanna be your boyfriend."-The Ramones_

"Hermione, Hermione wake up."  
_He whispered while shaking me._

"I'm up. I'm up."  
_I groggily opened my eyes and sat up in the bed._

"Why are you in my room?"

"Ah, mate you're in my room, remember?"

"Oh right, right."

_He sat on the edge of the bed.  
_"I brought you some biscuits."

"Thanks."  
_I ate them quickly despite myself. It was considering fasting but hunger got the better of me.  
_"I should probably go back to my room."

"You probably should."  
_He and I both got up. I got my clothes together and made my way to the door.  
_"I'll walk you down."

"You don't have to."

"I know but I wanted to talk to you about something anyway."

_We walked all the way to the bottom of the stairs and he still hadn't said anything.  
_"So uh, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Um… well…"  
_His ears turned bright red and his face was on its way.  
_"Oh fuck it…"

* * *

I was about to ask what the hell he was talking about but I didn't really get the chance. He grabbed me faster then I had ever seen and kissed me with all his strength. I came to my senses way too quickly because I pulled away. Thick, thick Hermione.

* * *

"Ron what was that?"

"That… um… well that was me doing something I've wanted to do for a long time. Hermione here's the thing; I know I told you that I didn't want to ruin our friendship and all that but time's almost up for me to do this and it's now or never. I've liked you since we met on the train. You know when you were looking for Neville's toad."  
_I nodded.  
_"I resented you most of our first year because I was convinced that you'd never see me as anything other then that dirty, idiot "weasel" kid. Then we became friends and I liked you even more but then I thought you'd only see me as your friend, or your brother or something. I get so jealous when you even talk about other blokes. That's why I freaked out about the Victor thing and I tried to be supportive of the George thing but after he kissed you I resented him too. All I'm trying to say is well; Hermione I need you. I want you. Please be mine."

_I probably resembled a goldfish my mouth was hanging open so much_.  
"Wow Ron. Wow."  
_I wiped my cheek.  
_"I think you made me cry."

"It was really that horrible, huh?"

"No, god no. It was… it was lovely because well; I still feel the same way about you. My feelings for you haven't changed."

"Really? What about not ruining our friendship and all?"

"Yes really and well I don't want to ruin our friendship but I only said that because I thought that was how you felt."

"So you feel the same way I do then?"

"Cross my heart."  
_I demonstrated._

"So then… this is gonna sound bloody corny but Hermione, will you be my well my girlfriend, I guess?"

_I flung my arms around him and hugged him as tight as I could.  
_"Of course!"

"Since you know, you're my girlfriend and all can I maybe kiss you again?"

_I put a thinking expression on.  
_"Hmmm… good question."  
_I smiled.  
_"Well go on then."

* * *

So he kissed me again and I kissed him too this time and it was wonderful. It was kinda weird you know seeing as it was Ron I was kissing but the awkwardness made it even more wonderful. I don't know exactly how long we stood there but after a while we heard a house elf cough.

* * *

"We had better go to bed."

"Yeah we should. Are you coming to classes tomorrow?"

"I think so; probably. I think I just needed sometime to myself you know?"

"Are you going to be okay? Cause you know if you aren't ready or still upset or whatever I can get your work for you."

"Ron, I think I will be fine. Not perfect but fine."

"Alright then, if you say so."

"Goodnight Ron."

_He kissed me one more time.  
_"Goodnight Hermione."

* * *

I AM RONALD BILIUS (that one sucks) WEASLEY'S GIRLFRIEND!!! Wow. This is so surreal. He kissed me and he needs me and… oh my god. This is unbelievable. And you know if it wasn't three in the morning I'd be fucking skanking on my bed; if only I had ska. (I miss muggle music so much sometimes.)

Tonight was just too good. I'm filled with so much goddamn happiness that I don't even know what to do with it. My happiness could carry a hippogriff if need be. I wonder what's going to happen tomorrow. I'm actually kinda hoping that we keep it a secret for a little while not because I'm embarrassed or anything I just think everyone would make a bigger then needed deal about it and that would kinda ruin the niceness. Plus keeping it a secret just seems so much more exciting. Like a Wuthering Height's type deal except I don't want to die in the end and I don't want my non existent brother to try and kill Ron. Okay I got way too Bronte on that one. Sorry I'm just mad giddy. I guess we'll just have to see what happens…

I got up and got dressed all the while trying to refrain from dancing across my room. Since my happiness carried over the hours I was asleep I practically skipped down the stairs and I ran right into Ron.

* * *

_He laughed.  
_"Whoa there Granger, in a hurry?"

_I smiled.  
_"No… just lost my step."

"Can I talk to you for a quick second?"

"Sure."

"This is probably going to sound really mean but let me explain it first. I don't want everyone making a big deal out of you know you and I and well I was wondering if you wouldn't mind if we didn't tell everyone right away."

"I was going to ask you the same thing."

"You're fine with it then?"

"Just dandy."

"Alrighty."  
_He gave me a quick kiss and then we nonchalantly walked into the common room.

* * *

_

It took a while for people to catch on. Nobody said anything until today actually. Today happens to be the second Friday of February by the way. It was Ginny who was the first one to say something. I was glad it was her, I was afraid she was losing her touch. We were sitting in the library when she finally asked…

"Hermione, what's going on with you and Ron?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Then why are you bright red and smiling like its Christmas?"

_I covered my mouth with a book and found the table very interesting.  
_"I'm sun burnt and I am not smiling."

"It's February."

"Wind burnt?"

"Hermione come on. I'm one of your best friends and he's my brother don't you think I should know? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese?"

"You can't tell anyone. Subtly Ginerva, subtly."

"I promise, just don't ever call me Ginerva again."

"Fine. Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

_I whispered as low as I could.  
_"Ron's kinda, sorta my um… boyfriend"

_Her eyes grew wide and her mouth kept opening and closing.  
_"Seriously?"  
_I nodded. She squealed and then hugged me. Madame Pince looked deadly.  
_"Oh Hermione that's wonderful!"

"Ginny, shhhhhh."

_I heard a voice behind me.  
_"Who asked Ginny to Hogsmeade this week?"

* * *

I turned around in my chair to see two very confused boys. They always pick the worst times to show up.

* * *

"Haha. Very funny Ron but oh I'm so happy for you!"  
_She practically jumped on him.  
_"Harry isn't it wonderful?"  
_She hugged him too._

_Harry looked as if McGonagall was hugging him instead of Ginny.  
_"Ginny, what's going on? What are you talking about?"

"Didn't Ron tell you?"

"Tell me what?"  
_He looked at Ron who could give a tomato a run for its money._

_Ginny, of course just kept on going. So much for subtly.  
_"Well Ron and Hermione are --"

_Ron bolted behind her and put his hand over her mouth. I couldn't stop laughing.  
__Ron looked apprehensively at Harry and chuckled nervously.  
_"Harry mate…"  
_He put his arm around Harry and directed him towards the door.  
_"How about you and I go for a walk?"  
_Harry nodded._

_After I was sure they had gone Ginny received a jellybean to the head.  
_"Ginny meet subtly; I don't think you two know each other."

"I wasn't very subtle was I?"

"You were about as subtle as fireworks."

"Sorry, I just figured Ron would've told Harry."

"Actually, I did too. Although I should've told Harry just as much as Ron should've."

"You do have a point there."  
_She paused.  
_"Why didn't you tell him? I mean of all people I woulda thought he'd be the first one to know."

"I'm kinda afraid of his reaction."

* * *

I didn't have long to wait. The door to the library opened again and in ran to very exasperated looking boys.

* * *

"Hermione, Ron just told me some story about how you and he were dating. He's just taking the piss out of me, right?"

"No, Harry. He's not."

"WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?"

"Mr. Potter if you don't quiet down this instant I will be subjected to giving you a week's worth of detentions!"

"I think we'd better go."

"Ginny's right; to the hallway."

_We walked into the hall and Harry stopped.  
_"Hermione tell me what's going on."

"Ron was telling you the truth Harry."

"THAT'S BLOODY BRILLIANT!!!"  
_And like Ginny; he enveloped me into a hug._

_When Harry finally calmed down we all started walking back to the common room. Ron put his arm around my shoulder and looked down at me.  
_"It is, isn't it?"  
_Then he kissed me._

"Don't you just love Fridays?"  
_Was all I could think to say._

_He smiled.  
_"Who doesn't?"

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	18. Chapter Eighteen: Ever Fallen In Love Wi...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Ever fallen in love with someone you shouldn't've fallen in love with?" is all The Buzzcocks, not me.**

**Author's Note: In usual fashion thanks to everyone who reads this and everyone who takes time to review it truly makes my day. I don't have a whole lot to say so I'm just gonna get a move on. Well Enjoi!**

**P.S. azn-anime-freak11 asked me a very interesting question that I felt I should answer. They asked me how if you were in love with someone how could you have a crush on someone else. They said it wasn't possible. Well my answer is that it is infact very possible. I have been in love with the same person for three years now and yes I mean love. With that said I have a devastating crush on one of his friends. It may not be possible for you, but it is possible for others. Thanks for asking and I hope that answered your question.**

**P.P.S. Karri-Granger pointed out that I write Hermione out of character. Inever actually realized that.I apologizefor itbut it's a little late to be telling me so Hermione will continue to be out of character. If you don't like it please don't read my story. If you do then by all means read all that your little heart desires.**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Eighteen: Ever Fallen In Love With Someone You Shouldn't've Fallen In Love With?**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I wish my youth would forever last. Why are these times so unfair?"-Green Day_

Can you believe that Ron and I have been dating for more then three months? I can't. It's still extremely surreal especially because I love him so much. The snow melted a long time ago and it's now being replaced by sunlight. The days are growing longer and warmer but they're also becoming bittersweet. We leave Hogwarts in less then two months and we're never coming back. We'll be of legal age. I'll be a fully recognized witch and not just some little Muggle born, Mudblood, know it all.

Today I went to one of my many meetings with McGonagall. We have career advisory meetings at least once a month now. It seems like picking a profession came so much easier to everyone else. Harry and Ron are both looking for ministry jobs although in surprisingly different departments. Harry wants to work in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement where as Ron is looking into the Department of Mysteries. I, like many others, thought it would have been the other way around. It seems like everybody is right where Harry and Ron are; knowing exactly what their future holds. Neville's taking extra classes to become a Healer at St.Mungo's. Seamus is off to Gringotts in the summer. Lavender, Parvati, and Padma will be apprenticing Madam Milkin's herself. The list goes on and on. It wasn't until today that I had come to my conclusion.

Professor McGonagall was growing weary from my lack of decision making and today was to be her last attempt. She offered me the last thing she could possibly think of. I walked into her office and was handed a clipping she had cut out of the Daily Prophet.

**Do you have a way with a quill? Can you get the scoop while sticking to the facts? Are you looking for your dream job? Then you've read the right ad. The Daily Propet is looking for a reporter who is willing to work in several different areas and topics. This is a position full of opportunity for the qualified witch or wizard.**

I didn't need to continue reading it because I knew it was the job for me. I filled out all the paperwork and if all goes well I should have a meeting with the editor within a month. How exciting would it be if I actually got the job? I love writing so much. If I didn't I wouldn't even bother with this notebook. Hermione J. Granger here reporting for the Daily Prophet. I like it. It works; has a nice ring to it. Now all I have to do is wait.

I waited and waited some more and well…. I got it! I got the job! I met the editor right away and was notified shortly afterward. I told Ron and I think he was happier for me then I was. I'm such a lucky person. I have a wonderful boyfriend, amazing friends, and pretty soon a fabulous job. The sun came out tomorrow, alright. I just can't believe how fast everything is going. It's like we're in wrap speed or something. NEWTS are next week and then we graduate.

I passed my NEWTS with flying colors if I do say so myself. I start work next week and we graduated tonight. The ceremony was incredible. I got to speak. I was really nervous but I think it went pretty well. Even some of the Slytherins applauded. I couldn't help but cry when it was over. It doesn't seem like my seven years are up. This is the last time I'll be here. This is the last time I'll sleep in this bed. I last time I think I'll ever feel 100 percentat home. My trunk is packed and my room looks empty. Not just physically empty. It looks lonely and lifeless. Everything that has happened in this very room has become only a memory, a part of my past, a piece of nostalgia. It's no longer occurring; no longer new and unexplored. Tomorrow will be my last time on the Hogwarts Express. I boarded as a child and I'll be disembarking as an adult.

Who would've thought so much would have changed? I grew up no matter how much I fought. I'm not eleven years old anymore no matter how much I want to be. Everything is so different now. I have friends now; real friends not just books. I've experienced so many things; good and bad that some people don't even experience at all. That weird little red haired boy I met on the train is now my boyfriend and I love him?!?!? Harry Potter "the boy who lived" is like a brother to me. I've had dinner with a convicted murder and common thieves . I've seen fireworks that have never gone out and have fought some of the world's darkest wizards. I've been turned into a cat and then into a statue all in the same year. I've been apart of a chess game. I've even dated a quidditch player. If someone would have told me all those things before I came to Hogwarts I would have never believed them and now my life wouldn't be the same without them. I don't question life anymore; I live it. I don't dream of a future anymore because it's already here.

Those were the things I pondered on the train ride home. There was no more Exploding Snap or trading Chocolate Frog Cards. No more hexing Malfoy and his minions. We were just sitting in our compartment talking. Everyone looked so mature; so grown up. Harry was discussing; not talking, discussing; quidditch with Ron and Neville whom Ginny was unusually interested in. He had infact grown into quiet an attractive boy. I asked Ginny about this later and she said that since she and Seamus had broken up in April Neville and become quiet the prospect. She's worse then I am sometimes.

Anywho, back to the train. I was just sitting there holding Ron's hand taking in as much as I could. Like the way he rubbed his thumb against the top of my hand without even noticing it or how Harry's eyes still flickered whenever he got excited or how Neville was still as awkward and nervous as he had ever been but had figured out how to hide it or how Ginny still had the innocence of the little girl lost in the Chamber. She always seemed like she wanted to talk about that but she never did. After a while I put my head on Ron's shoulder and just observed in a daze. I hope I never forget my time at Hogwarts. I hope we're all still friends even after we get older and have Hogwarts students of our own. I don't want anything to change.

The train came to a hault and I left it somewhat broken hearted. My childhood mirth felt like it had been drained out of me. My parents weren't standing at the gate waiting for me like they used to but in reality I didn't need them there; I just wanted them to be. I decided to take a taxi home but I was going to wait with Harry, Ron, and Ginny for Mrs.Weasley but she never came. She sent him instead. Every 6'1; red haired; green eyed ounce of him. I hadn't thought about him since Christmas but when I saw him my breath got caught in me chest. I just kept telling myself that I loved his brother.

* * *

"Hullo."  
_He took Ginny's trunk.  
_"You lot haven't been waiting long have you?"  
_We shook our heads.  
_"Mum told one of us to come and get you. She went a little overbored for dinner tonight. Fred said he'd stay and watch the shop so here I am."

"What's going on for dinner tonight?"  
_Ron asked._

"She's having this big dinner for you since you graduated and all. Everyone's going to be there. She had to bust out that grotty old picnic table."

"Whose everyone?"

"Well you, Ron, Harry, Myself, Fred, Bill, possibly Fleur, Charlie cause he's coming home for a bit, Percy if he can get off work, Dad oh and before I forget Hermione; Mum told me to tell you to come as well."

"I'm sure I can."

"One more thing your Mum and Dad are outside. Theywanted me tolet you knowthat they're waiting, whenever you're ready."

"Are you Hermione's personal messenger now?"

"You know Ron I was glad to see you for about 10 minutes."

"Likewise."

"Wait a tick, George how'd they know who you were?"

_He laughed.  
_"The hair."

_I picked up my trunk.  
_"I suppose I'll be off then."

"I'll help you with your trunk."

"Thanks Ron."

* * *

All five of us as odd as we must've looked walked to the lot where George saw my parents. I hugged Ginny and Harry and kissed Ron. I love his kisses. I turned to say goodbye to George but the expression on his face stopped me. His mouth was hanging open and his eyebrow was raised in confusion.

* * *

_Ron waved his hand in front of George's face.  
_"You okay there George?"

"What… Huh? Yeah I'm fine. It's just… what… why… kiss… you… Hermione."  
_He gulped.  
_"What in hell is going on?"

_I turned red and Ron, Ginny, and Harry laughed.  
_"Didn't Mum tell you?"  
_George shook his head.  
_"Hermione and I are dating."

"That's not possible. She's Hermione and you're you. She's too smart to fancy you. There's no way."

"Gee George thanks."

"No it's just… you're you. You two are too young or something."  
_He looked at me and then at the floor.  
_"You can't be serious."

"Their serious George. Believe me. You only saw a preview of their…"  
_Harry shuddered._

"You don't have to keep going I get it. Guess I just missed the memo or something."

_I looked over and found my parent's car.  
_"You guys I really better get going."  
_I gave another round of hugs_

_When I got to George he whispered in my ear.  
_"I keep forgetting you're not eleven anymore. You really have grown up."

"George what are you telling her?"

"Nothing important; just mentioned the time that you thought spiders were taking over the house."

"I never thought that."

"Yeah you did. At Christmas remember? You had to sleep in mine and Fred's room the whole holiday."

_Ron chuckled nervously and shot George a death glare.  
_"I have no idea what you're talking about. Hermione don't listen to him."

_I giggled.  
_"Sure Ron sure. Bye you guys I'll see you soon."

* * *

When I got into the car my Mum told me I looked so mature and so grown up. Dad told me I was an adult now and that I had responsibility. The whole way home they told me how proud they were that I had grown into "quite the young lady." I felt the same way 10 minutes before I got off the train.

So if I'm so grown up how come George still effects me like he did? How come it's him I'm thinking about now instead of Ron? Grown up's aren't supposed to be feeling the way I am. I forgot about him plain and simple but then he had to go and pop up. I just keep chanting to myself that I'm in love with Ron, not George. George is a school girl crush; that's all. I keep forgetting I'm not a school girl anymore.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	19. Chapter Nineteen: Now I'm So Confused

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Now I'm so confused" is all Holly Tree, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks very much to everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews it means the world it really does. I hope you all had a nice holiday as well. I also wanted to let you know that the story is nowhere near finished even though Ron and Hermione are going out. I have a lot more to write so please just be patient and continue to read. I think that's all for today. Well Enjoi!**

**P.S. I know the ending conversationis really random and not really Harry Potter-ish at all but I wanted to put it in there because well I just did.**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Nineteen: Now I'm So Confused**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Why don't you make up your fucking mind?"- Reel Big Fish_

Despite myself I got ready for dinner at the Burrow. I mean come on, what's the big deal anyway? It's only dinner. Just dinner with my boyfriend and his family. A family I've already spent numerous amounts of time with. It's only a gathering where people eat food with my boyfriend, some close friends, a family, and one very gorgeous brother. Dammit.

I walked into the Burrow and was immediately greeted by Ginny in the hallway. We walked into the living room which was full of every single Weasley child, except one. I hugged Harry, kissed Ron, and said my hellos to Bill, Charlie, Percy, and Fred but George seemed to be MIA. I wondered where he was. I also kept reminding myself that I shouldn't be worried about George. He wasn't there, big deal. He was only Ron's older brother. That's all, nothing more, nothing less. Ron is in fact my boyfriend. George isn't. Mrs. Weasley walked into the living room and enveloped me into a hug. Then she looked at the clock and sighed.

* * *

"George is still at work; I see. I wonder if he'll take up living there. All day he's been sulking about, it's driving me mad."

"Yeah he's been acting off since he met Ginny, Harry, and I at the station."

"Gee Ron, I wonder why."

"Yeah Fred, I do wonder. What was that supposed to mean anyway?"

"If you can't figure it out, then you don't deserve to know."

"Oi Fred. Just leave him alone."  
_Charlie said from across the room._

_Fred was about to say something when Mrs. Weasley cut him off.  
_"Fred listen to your brother. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with you lot bickering all the time. It hasn't been this bad since Charlie was seven and Ron's only been home for six hours!"

_She looked at me and Ginny."  
_"Why don't you girls come and help me in the kitchen?"  
_We nodded and stared to leave the room. She looked at the boys again.  
_"You boys go outside and degnome the garden or something. Just don't bother your father and if I hear so much as a peep--"

"But Mum it's raining."

"A little rain never hurt anyone; just don't bring it in my house. Now go."  
_She pointed to the back door that looked at the clock and sighed again.  
__She looked at Ginny.  
_"Your brothers will be the death of me. Hermione will you get that pie out of the oven for me?"

"Sure."  
_I took it out.  
_"Where should I put it?"

"On the counter is fine dear, thank you."  
_She smiled at me.  
_"Hermione I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Oh Mum, do not subject Hermione to one of your speeches."

"I do not have speeches."

"Yes you do and now you're going to say it to Hermione."

"Excuse me but what's going on?"

"Hermione, Mum's going to tell you about how happy she is that you're…"  
_She made quotation signs with her fingers.  
_"….'seeing her son' and all that jazz. She does it every time one of them bring someone home."

"Oh hush up Ginerva. I was not."  
_She looked at me.  
_"Hermione, dear I just wanted to say that if I could have picked anyone for Ronald or any of my boys for that matter it would have been you."

_I smiled but turned a dark pink.  
_"Thank you Mrs. Weasley."

"You're welcome, dear."

* * *

I looked at the window at all the boys playing quidditch. They must've put water repelling charms on themselves because not a single drop of rain was affecting them and it was pouring. Ron looked so handsome sitting on his broom. He was watching the game intently making sure no one on the opposing "team" got anything through the hoops he was protecting. They called a time out because Charlie threw the quaffle too far.Ron turned a little bit and looked at the house. I suppose he saw me because he smiled and waved. I waved back.

* * *

"Hey Mum, if you could pick a boy for me who would it be?"

"Harry, of course."

_Ginny smirked and repeated her mother.  
_"Of course."

"Well he is a very nice and handsome boy Ginny, if you would only give him a chance."

"I'm not going to give him a chance simply because I do not like Harry and he defiantly does not like me."

_I chuckled.  
_"Yeah sure Gin."

"You're supposed to be on my side."

"Well your mother does have a point."

"For the last time I do not like Harry James Potter and he does not like me."

_Mrs. Weasley patted Ginny on the shoulder._  
"You keep telling yourself that, honey."

"Muuuuuuuuuuuum!"  
_Mrs. Weasley and I laughed.  
_"Fine if you're going to be that way I'm putting a stop to this once and for all."  
_She stomped to the back door, threw it open and shouted."  
_"HARRY CAN YOU COME IN HERE FOR A MINUTE?"

_Harry nodded, flew down, and walked into the kitchen.  
_"Did you need something?"

"I just need to prove a point by asking you a few questions."

"Alright."

"Harry, do you like me?"

"Yeah, of course I do."

"No not like that you idiot. Do you like like me. Be honest."  
_She put her hands on her hips._

"Um… well… um…"

"It's alright Harry; I won't hold anything against you just answer."

"Alright then, no. I mean I like you but not like that."

"Thank you. Now, do I like you?"

"Um… no? Not to my knowledge anyway."

_She nodded.  
_"Thank you. You can go now."  
_Harry walked back into the rain as Ginny turned to face her mother and me.  
_"See I told you Harry doesn't like me and I don't like Harry."

"That's bollocks Ginny and you know it."

* * *

I turned around to see who said this and my eyes met a soaking wet George. He was dripping from head to toe. He was wearing muggle clothes but they looked as if he had just taken them out of the washing machine. His white oxford shirt was un tucked and almost transparent and his black tie was sticking to it. His blue jeans looked almost black because of the rain and his Hightops were covered in mud. Ginny was almost in tears she was laughing so hard. I on the other hand couldn't take my eyes off of him. Jesus christ that boy is built. Wow. And his hair looked so tousled and wow. Just wow. The things I could do to George Weasley. He's only Ron's brother. He's only Ron's brother. HE'S RON'S BROTHER!

* * *

_Mrs. Weasley had her back to him and as she turned around said.  
_"George Arthur Weasley you will not use that kind of language under my ro---"  
_When her eyes fell upon him her mouth was wide open.  
_"OUT, OUT! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE THIS INSTANT AND DRY OFF!"

"Mum, I can't dry off when it's raining."

"YOU HAVE A WAND!"

"No I don't. I left it in my room."

"Oh for christ sakes."

* * *

She took her wand out of the pocket of her apron, muttered a spell and George was no longer dripping water, although he was still soaking wet.

* * *

"Wasn't I supposed to be dry?"

"No, serves you right. You're just not dripping anymore."

"So you're just going to leave me like this?"

"Yes and don't you dare think about changing your clothes, drying yourself off, or getting anyone else to do it for you. You will stay like that until dinner is finished."

"Won't I get sick?"

"No."

"Bloody hell."

"Don't use that language--"

"--under your roof, yeah I know."

"Then why do you insist on doing so."

"Because it annoys you."

_Ginny saw another argument brewing so she interrupted it.  
_"Why are you wet anyway?"

"I walked home."

"Couldn't you have apparated?"

"I'm not too keen on apparating in the rain."

"But you'll walk home in it?"

"I fancy it."

"You fancy it?"

"Yeah."

"What in god's name did I do to deserve brothers like the ones I have?"

_George ignored her and turned to his mother.  
_"Look Mum I'm sorry I messed up the ---"  
_Then he saw me._ _He paused._ _Then remembered he himself.  
_"the the, kitchen. Yeah I'm sorry I messed up the kitchen."

"Aren't you going to say hello to Hermione."

"Mrs. Weasley its okay I saw him ear--"

_He smiled.  
_"Hi Hermione."

"Hi George."

"George go and set the table."

"Can I run upstairs and get my wand?"

"Without magic."

"Bug--"

"George!"

"Bug, bug there's a bug on the window."

_Mrs. Weasley sighed.  
_"Hermione go with him and make sure he sets it right, please."

"Sure Mrs. Weasley."

"You know Mum I don't need help."

"She's not helping you; she's making sure you do it."

"Right because I'm how old again?"

"Don't take that tone with me young man."

"What tone? I was just asking a simple question."

"Six. You're six years old; well you act like it anyway."

"Six, hmmm. I think I look at least twel--"  
_Mrs. Weasley hit the back of his head.  
_"Ow!"

"George, table, now!"

"I'm going I'm going."

"And don't break anything!"

* * *

He picked up the stack of plates that were sitting on the counter. I followed him into where the table was set up. We were quiet for a long time while I helped him set the table. I handed him a napkin and he said…

* * *

"Am I really that immature?"

_I looked up at him confused by his question.  
_"Hmm?"

"You know, do I really act like I'm six?"

"Sometimes."  
_He looked down at the table with a frown starting at his lips.  
_"But that's what people like about you."  
_I said quickly._

"People like me because I'm immature?"

"No people like you because you _can_ be immature. You know when to be funny and have a good time but you also know when to be serious. People like that."

"You mean you like that."

"That's not what I meant."  
_Oh hell; yes it was._

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Yeah."

"Why do you like Ron?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean why do you like him? What do you see in him? I'm just curious."

_I thought about it for a while.  
_"Well he's a great guy."

"But what makes him a great guy?"

_I thought even longer.  
_"Well he--"

_Mrs. Weasley walked into the room and cut me off.  
_"Well George, I'm surprised you did a nice job."

_George winked at me.  
_"Does that mean I can dry off now?"

"No. Hermione can you call everyone for dinner please? I need to have a little word with George."

"Sure."

* * *

I poked my head out the back door and called everyone for dinner then I helped Ginny with all the food. And boy was it a lot. Mrs. Weasley had made everything in her power and it was all delicious. I sat next to Ron and held his hand the whole time. I don't really know why but something inside me just wanted to hold his hand. After dinner we all sat in the living room and talked. Not long after Mrs. Weasley sent George upstairs to change. I looked at my watch and it was close to the time I had to be home. I probably would've fallen asleep right there if I hadn't gotten up. I was so comfortable on their couch next to Ron. I said my goodbyes and thank yous to everyone then Ron walked me to the door. We kissed goodbye and he opened the door for me. I walked out and saw a very sullen faced George sitting on the pouch. He jumped at the sound of the door closing and then looked at me.

* * *

"Hermione, leaving so soon?"

"Afraid so. I was going to fall asleep if I didn't get off of your couch."

"Understandable. I have spent many a night on that couch; it's the place to be."  
_He scratched the tip of his nose and I noticed he had something on his arm_

"Why George Weasley is that a tattoo?"

_He smiled.  
_"Why yes it is. You wanna see it?"

_I nodded.  
_"Most definatly."  
_He lifted up the sleeve of his shirt._  
_It was a big and colorful picture of a quidditch pitch. It started at his shoulder and ended just above his sleeve._  
"Wait a tick."  
_I ran my finger over it.  
_"This is a muggle tattoo."

_He chuckled.  
_"Yeah. I like um better."

"When did you get it?"

"Eh, sometime last year I think. I've been pretty good about hiding it but don't tell anyone. Mum's a little… whats the word? Psycho, mad… about…"  
_He imitated his mother  
_"'those awful things muggles put on their skin.'"

_I laughed.  
_"I see. I won't tell anyone."

_He smiled at me.  
_"Much appreciated."

_I look a glance at my watch.  
_"Oh shit! I gotta go.I shoulda beenhome ten minutes ago."

"That's my fault, sorry."

"No it isn't; don't worry. I just got sidetracked."

"Hermione…"  
_He laughed._  
"…go home."

"Right, Goodnight George."

"'Night."  
_He waved then I apparated.

* * *

As soon as I got home I took a shower and got into bed except I couldn't fall asleep. Thoughts kept floating in and out of my head. The way George looked when he walked in the door. The way George can be serious if he needs to. The way George makes me laugh. And lastly the way George makes me forget about Ron._

I need to stop this George thing. I keep telling myself it's only some stupid physical attraction. He's hot, so what? Big deal. I'm only attracted to his looks not who he is. That's why I love Ron. I'm not attracted to him because of that. I mean the boy is damn fine but that's not why I love him. I love him because he's great and wonderful. He can tell the kind of day I had just by the way I say hello. "But so can George" shouts the little voice inside my head. No he can't! Only Ron can. Ron is amazing and I love him. End of story, case closed. I LOVE RON…. I just wanna know why I keep having to tell myself that.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	20. Chapter Twenty: To Love And Be Loved

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "To love and be loved" is all Bright Eyes, not me.**

**Author's Note: Everyone who reads this and who takes the time to review simply makes me day, so thanks kids. Um let me see… This isn't a very long chapter because I haven't had a lot of time to write. All this shit is going on with my friends and I've got midterms next week (actually I should be writing a paper for History right now on some random president but whatever) so needless to say I've been boggled down. That's about it I think. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twenty: To Love And Be Loved**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_And as they all grow older the truth will be understood, cause we never turn out the way we thought we would."- Death Cab For Cutie_

Wow it's been ages! Well three months at least. I've been so busy with work. Basically I'm just writing short blurbs but it pays well and at least I'm writing. I met Ron for lunch today and we had a very interesting conversation. We were sitting in the Three Broomsticks having a lovely little chat and then he sprung it on me. He reached across the table and grabbed my hand in his. As a side note I love holding his hand.

* * *

"Hermione I… ah… I've been thinking about moving out of the Burrow and finding a flat on my own."

"Oh Ron! That's wonderful!"

_He put up his hand.  
_"Wait I'm not done. I think it'd be a little hard living a hundred percent on my own and I'd probably get a little lonely and well…"  
_He gulped.  
_"Hermione do you wanna get a flat with me?"

* * *

It too me a minute to register what he had said. I turned his question over and over again in my brain for what felt like centuries with his ears growing redder by the minute. Between the both of us the rent wouldn't be that much and it would be nice to move out of my parent's house and above all things I'd love to live with Ron even if we do argue about god knows what.

* * *

"It's gonna be hard but I think we can pull it off. So yes; I would love to get a flat with you."

"That's smashing!"

"Were you planning on looking for a place sometime soon?"

"Well… I have off next Sunday…"

"Hmmm, I think I only have to work until noon. I can meet you when I get off."

"All right; that works."

"I'm really excited! There's so much we'd have to do though; get our things together, pack, arrange furniture, make sure it's in the right location, and in the right price range, clean, mo--"

_He shook his head then chuckled.  
_"Hermione, let's just find a place first."

"Right, sorry."

_He looked at his watch.  
_"Bugger, I'm expected back at work."

"Yeah me too."

* * *

We walked out of the Three Broomsticks still holding hands. When I hugged him I didn't want to let go and don't even get me started on the kiss. I walked back into work with a teeny tiny spring in my step. I was going to live with Ron.

We did meet on Sunday as planned and fell in love with one of the first flats we looked at. It's right on the edge of Hogsmeade overlooking a little flower shop. It has brilliantly big windows that you can see Hogwarts from. There's two bedrooms, a living room type deal, a kitchen, and of course a bathroom. We're going to make the smaller bedroom an office we can both use. There's also a wall in the living room that has been made into a gigantic bookself much to Ron's dismay. The kitchen's little but big enough for us. We take up residence on Friday.

We're almost entirely unpacked although it's been kind of hard because I've been loaded with stories for the paper and Ron has the most random working hours. I think he still has a few things at the Burrow. Ginny's been helping me decorate because well it's not really my thing. Mrs. Weasley dropped in and inspected everything and made sure the flat was to her satisfaction. Harry's also been really great in helping with the unpacking process.

I was sitting in our living room (can you believe it _our_ living room not _mine?_) looking at Hogwarts and waiting for Ron to appear from work. Somebody knocked on the door and I assumed it was him although why would be knock?

I opened it and saw the last person I expected to see. I expected clear blue eyes instead I saw green; the brightest green imaginable. He was holding a tattered old box which seemed to be filled with all things orange. He had a slight smile playing at his lips and his cheeks were a light tinge of pink. He looked so adorable in his ratty old t-shirt and faded once dark blue jeans. His Hightops even looked as if they had been worn by several different people which I always assumed they had been. That was until he told me that they had been his, and only his since he was eight. They were a birthday gift from one of his father's relatives and he had loved them so much that he refused to get rid of them. As he grew he made sure the Hightops grew with him. That was one of the stories about him that I loved. And there he was right in front of me; standing in our doorway.

* * *

"George! What are you doing here?"

_His looked down at the box.  
_"Mum sent me over with this; I think she just wanted it out of the house. It's all Ron's Canon's stuff. Fred was supposed to be the one delivering it but apparently dates are more important."  
_He shrugged._

_I laughed.  
_"Come in then."  
_He walked inside and I pointed to the kitchen table.  
_"You can just put it there on the table I suppose."

_He sat it down and I immediately began rooting through it. He looked around the flat.  
_"I'm assuming that you had something to do with the books?"  
_I chuckled and nodded.  
_"All four volumes of _Hogwarts: A History_?"

"Of course; did you really except me to be happy with just one when they keep reissuing it all the time?"

"Well…"

_I went back to looking through the box and picked out a horrid orange bed sheet.  
_"What the hell?"

_He sighed._  
"Yeah. I'd hid all that if I were you. The boy's obsessed with the bloody Canons. Never understood why myself; they haven't one a game in god knows how long."

"How could I forget about Ron and the Canons?"

_He laughed.  
_"I don't think anyone can. He doesn't let them."  
_He looked around again.  
_"The place looks really good."

"Thanks, but don't tell me, tell your sister. That's all her doing."

"Yeah Ginny's room was covered in decorating magazines the last time I checked. I see she put the _What's the right color spell for you? _article to good use."

_I giggled.  
_"You should see the rest of it. I could give you the grand tour if you like."

"Ooooh. That would be lovely but only if I get a pamphlet?"

"Sorry, Sir but we're all out."

"Touché."

* * *

I showed him the kitchen, the office ("You know Ron's deck isn't going to stay that organized for long, right?"), the bathroom ("I like the ducks.") and lastly the bedroom and then back to the living room. Where..

* * *

_A very sly smile spread across his face.  
_"Only one bedroom, huh?"

"Well, we wanted an office so…"

_He winked.  
_"Yeah, sure Granger."

"We did."

"Oh I believe you."  
_He winked again._

"Just bugger off."

"From the looks of it…"  
_He nodded toward the bedroom._  
"I'm not the one doing the buggering."  
_I smacked his arm.  
_"What was that for?"

"You know."

"No I don't. I didn't say anything."

"You implied---"

"I implied nothing. I was merely stating that you only had one bedroom."

"Right."

"Honest."

"Are we done now?"

"Possibly."  
_He looked at the clock on the wall.  
_"Actually, as much as I would love to stay here and banter with you I have some inventing that needs to be done. I really must be 'buggering off'."

"Thank for dropping his things by."

"Anytime; give the little wanker a hello for me will ya?"

"Of course."

_He waved.  
_"Adieu."

"Bye."

* * *

And with a pop he was gone. It was only a second before Ron popped in.

* * *

"Hey there."  
_He kissed me and then before I know it had spotted the bright orange shining from the table._ _He ran to it.  
_"My Canons stuff!"

"Yeah. George dropped that by right before you came home. He told me to tell you hello."

_He looked up at me his smile slowly fading.  
_"How long was he here?"

"About ten minutes; tops."

"Oh all right._"  
__His attention was back on the box. He pulled out the sheet.  
_"We are so putting this on the bed."

"No we're not. It's my bed too you know and I refuse to sleep on florescent orange sheets."

"Come on; it's the Canons. I let you put your books all over the place."

"That's different."

"How?"

"You don't have to sleep on them do you?"

"Well no, but you're missing the point."

"This has a point?"

"Yes… it… um… well…. Just pleeeeeeease can we use the sheets?"

"You can use them to sleep on the couch because that's as far as those sheet are going."

"Fine be that way."

"I will."

"Can I atleast put the poster up the in the office?"  
_He held it up._

_I sighed.  
_"If you must."

_He ran into the office, tacked it on the wall, then ran back into the room.  
_"Done."

"So I guessed."

"You're not going to change your mind about the sheets then?"

"I would rather sleep in Harry's old broom cupboard then on those sheets."

_He sighed.  
_"Only we would argue over sheets."

"Only you would want orange sheets."

"Only you wouldn't."

"I wouldn't be so sure of that."

"This was our first argument in our flat."

"It's our own holiday."

"August 17th; a day that will live in infamy forever."

"Clever, Ronald, clever."

"I thought it was."

"And how is that working out for you?"

"How's what working out?"

"Being clever."

"Very funny Hermione. That one was a knee-slapper."

"Don't start."

"You did."

"Fine I'm done if you are."

"Our first argument has now ended."

"Can we just go to bed?"

"Of course."

* * *

I couldn't fall asleep. I must've been tossing and turning for atleast an hour. Our first argument in our flat was about sheets. How pathetic. I couldn't stop thinking about how if we could have a proper argument about sheets what else we would argue about. I was beginning to think that moving in together wasn't such a good idea. It was though it really was. What was one argument? We are both stubborn people we can deal with it. When I finally got that out of my head George popped in it. George isn't as argumentative as Ron. Oh who am I kidding, yes he is. He and Ron are practically the same. Their personalities are almost carbon copies of one another. The only way they differ is physically. This again leads to my attraction to George being only physical. When I finally stopped thinking about that I still couldn't stop tossing and turning. I just couldn't fall asleep. I had assumed, however, that Ron was.

* * *

"Hermione?"

"Hmmm?"

"How long was George here?"

"What?"

"How long was George here when he dropped off my stuff?"

"I already answered that."

"I know, I just forgot."

"He was here for ten minutes."

"What'd you two talk about?"

"I dunno. He just dropped off your stuff. I showed him the flat and he left. Why is this so important?"

"No reason; just curious."

* * *

There was a sense of finality in his voice that kept me from retorting. I was too tired to ponder his sudden interest in George. After a couple of minutes he put his arm around me.

* * *

"I love you Hermione."

"I love you too Ron."

* * *

And at that point in time I really did.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	21. Chapter TwentyOne: Ever Kissed His Girl ...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Ever kissed his girl goodbye?" is all The Offspring, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews. It means the world. This is an interesting chapter. I was feeling really dramatic tonight and this was the outcome. I hope you like it. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twenty-One: Ever Kissed His Girl Goodbye?**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_Last time that she kissed me before her boyfriend blacked my eye."- RX Bandits_

"Hey Ron. How was work?"

"Eh, you know work. Sorry I'm late."  
_He sat down at the table._

"It's no big deal you're always late. We got an owl from your mum today."

"Really? What did she have to say?"

"She invited us to dinner on Friday."

"What's Friday?"

"Halloween."

"Do you wanna go?"

"Yeah sure. It'll be nice."

"Okay then we'll go."

"You finish your dinner and I'll send your mum an owl."

* * *

I replied to Mrs. Weasley and then began cleaning up the dishes. Unfortunatly I've never been very good at cleaning spells. He had come home late again. We've been living together for almost three months and he comes home late atleast four nights a week. I know it's his job. I understand that. It's just I don't know, disappointing. I get off of work at six o'clock. I come home and attempt to make some kind of dinner. I get some work done, eat my own dinner and wait. At first I argued with him about it but I was fighting a losing battle.

He didn't get home tonight until after nine. I hardly see him anymore. Between me having to work on weekends and him leaving at seven and getting home passed nine most weekdays I feel like I'm living alone. He walked into the kitchen, cleaned off his plate, put his arms around me and kissed my neck. Hey at least when I do get to see him he does stuff like that.

My alarm went off early on Friday. I had a meeting with my editor that morning. I woke up and still felt arms around me. I was surprised to see that he hadn't left yet. I however, wasn't surprised that he had all the blankets. Bastard doesn't realize how cold our flat is in the morning. I searched the floor for some form of clothing, settled for a pair of his boxers and a sweater and got up to make coffee. He still hadn't gotten up by the time I left for work. I should've been happy about this because the later he gets into work the later he comes home. I was going to wake him up but he looks so damn cute when he sleeps. I should've woken him up.

Right when I was getting ready to leave work I received the owl I had been dreading. The "Hey Hermione, I have to work late. Go to dinner without me and I'll be there as soon as I can sneak out. I'll see you later. Love Ron." owl. I get owls like that a lot.

So I went home, got dressed, hoped I wouldn't have to go alone, then Apparated to the Burrow. I walked in just in time to see Mrs. Weasley walking down the stairs.

* * *

"Hermione, dear it's lovely to see you."  
_She hugged me._

"Hi Mrs. Weasley, thanks so much for inviting us to dinner."

"It's no trouble dear; I love having you all together. But where's Ron?"

"Oh he had to work late. He said he'd come as soon as he got off."

"Oh alright. Well come on everyone's in the living room."

* * *

I made my way to the living room and had the same conversation two or three more times. Ron however wasn't the only Weasley missing. Charlie was in Romania, Bill was visiting his girlfriend's family, and George was on a date. Yes. George was on a date. I seemed to be the only one who didn't find this information humorous.

By the time dinner started Ron still hadn't shown. I was beginning to feel alone. Everyone seemed to have someone else. Ginny and Harry were flirting like mad, Fred was joined by Angelina and Percy and his fiancé Penelope were chatting animatedly about the new Minister. I'd never felt so alone at the Burrow and then he came.

The front door opened and in walked a very smug looking George.

* * *

"George dear you're late."

"Yeah, sorry Mum."  
_He bent down and kissed her on the cheek._

"You lot haven't been eating long have you?"

"No we just sat down."

"Great."  
_He sat in the empty seat next to me._

"So George how was your date?"  
_Fred said as he sniggered._

"It was all right."  
_He shrugged.  
_"Kinda boring."  
_He muttered this so only I heard him.

* * *

Dinner carried on as usual after that. Everyone seemed to be grilling George about his date. From the sound of it; it hadn't been a date at all. Fred had set him up yet again with that horrid girl from Hogsmeade and yet again he left the scene of the date annoyed. We were halfway through dessert when he leaned down a little to talk to me._

* * *

"So, where's Ron?"

"Work."  
_I tried hard not to sound exasperated. I guess I didn't try hard enough._

"I'm guessing this is nothing new then."

"You guess correctly. He's late all the time."

"That blows. I'm sorry Hermione."

"Eh, it does but it's his job and that's more important. I understand that."

"His job can be more important then stuff like this but it shouldn't be more important then you."

"That's not what I meant."

"I know it's what I meant."  
_I frowned slightly.  
_"Look I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I'm sure you're Ron's top priority."

"It's okay. You were only being honest."

"I was being an arse."

_I laughed.  
_"You said it."

"Ah, I made you laugh."

"No you didn't."

"You're right. Percy did."  
_He pointed across the table at Percy._

_He looked up at George.  
_"What?"

"Nothing Perce. Just telling Hermione how interesting things at the Ministry must be."

"They are. It's good to see that you've taken an interest."

"Oh I've taken an interest alright."  
_He looked down at me then whispered.  
_"An interest in staying as far away from it as physically possible."  
_I snorted into my tea.  
_"By Joe I did it again."

"No you didn't. I coughed."

"Riiiiiiiight."

"What am I going to do with you?"

"Oh I have a few ideas."  
_He winked._

"I'm sure Ron would really go for that."

"Oh you know it."

* * *

Our banter continued until the end of dinner. Needless to say I didn't feel alone anymore. For some reason he has that affect on me. He can make me forget about everything else. When I talk to him I feel like it's only me and George. Nothing else matters. I wish Ron had that affect on me. I wish I were talking to Ron and not George. But George was there and Ron wasn't. When it was time for me to leave Ron still hadn't shown. For some reason it upset me so much. I said my goodbyes to everyone and left the house. I was going to walk home. I needed the time to think. I was in tears before I even walked off the porch. I was halfway to the end of the street when I heard George calling after me.

* * *

"HERMIONE! HERMIONE WAIT!"  
_I turned and waited for him to catch up. By the time he got to me he was out of breath from running.  
_"You forgot your scarf."  
_He held it up._

_I took it from him and wrapped it around my neck.  
_"Oh stupid me. Thanks."

"No prob-- Are you crying?"

"Oh no, my eyes were watering, allergies."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing just allergies."

"It's not allergies Hermione. If it was allergies you wouldn't have tears streaming down your cheeks. Now what's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing's wrong."  
_I turned to walk away but he grabbed my arm._

"It's Ron isn't it."

"No, it's not Ron."

"Hermione what's wrong?"

"Dammit."  
_I couldn't hold it in anymore. I just started blubbering.  
_"It is Ron. I hardly ever see him anymore. I feel so alone."

"It's okay."  
_He hugged me._

"No it's not. He's hardly home and even when he is we argue. Remember that time you asked me why I liked him so much?"  
_He nodded.  
_"I didn't even know how to answer because I'm so unsure of it myself."

"Don't say that. You love him it's doesn't matter why."

"Yes it does."

"Hermione look at me."  
_I looked up.  
_"Ron loves you. I know he does. He'd be mad not to and you love him."  
_He hugged me again.  
_"Here use my sleeve and wipe your eyes."  
_I giggled.  
_"Go on."

_I did.  
_"Thanks."

"You're welcome."

"Now why don't you Apparate on home."

"I was going to walk."

"Well then walk on home. I'll walk with you if you want; I pass your flat anyway."

"That would be nice. Can we walk through the muggle towns though?"

"Yeah sure."  
_We walked a little ways and I felt so much better seeing the muggle children trick or treating.  
_"You really miss it don't you?"

"Yeah, I mean I love my life and I don't know what I'd do if I weren't a witch but I miss being a little girl. I miss trick or treating."

"What exactly is trick or treating?"

"Well on Halloween muggles dress up and go around towns and neighborhoods looking for candy. They knock on doors say 'trick or treat' and get candy. It's really fun."

"Looks it."  
_He pointed to a little boy and girl who were dressed up as a little witch and wizard.  
__He chuckled.  
_"I like the costumes."

"Thought you might."

* * *

He walked me all the way to my flat. We were quiet most of the way but the closer we got to Hogsmeade the better I felt. I honestly don't know why I was so upset. It's probably just PMS or something. But PMS won't explain what I did when we got to the flat.

We stopped in front of the building and said goodbye. He gave me a hug, made sure I wasn't crying anymore, then I started walking up the steps. Then I did something I should have never done.

I turned around, ran back down the steps and stopped right in front of him. Then I put my arms around his neck and kissed him like he had kissed me all that time ago. I don't know why I did it but I did. It didn't last long though. Just like last time we were stopped. And just like last time it was Ron that stopped us.

He had seen it all. He had Apprated right behind us on his way home from work. It was a split second before he charged at George. I tried to pull him off. It wasn't George's fault. It was mine. I kept screaming that while they fought but neither seemed to care. I gave up after a while because my voice had grown hoarse from all the shouting. I just stood there in tears and watched them fight hoping they would finish soon. It took a while but they finally stopped beating the hell out of each other. It wasn't a fight like the ones they used to have at Hogwarts. It wasn't a lets beat the shit out of each other and then laugh about it later fight. They truly wanted to destroy each other I could see it in their eyes. When they finally broke apart I could see George's eye turning black and there was blood running from his eyebrow. Ron's nose and lip were bleeding something awful. They were both doubled over trying to catch their breath. When they did the arguing started.

* * *

"You have no right to kiss my girlfriend!"

"I do when her boyfriend ditches her all the time!"

"I DO NOT DITCH HER!"

"No that's right YOU'RE JUST NEVER HOME!"

"I have a job!"

"I do too but I still manage to spend more time with her then you do!"

"She's not your girlfriend!"

"I act more like her boyfriend then you fucking do!"

"What's the supposed to mean?"

"I don't make her fucking cry!"

"Neither do I!"

"Then why did I walk her all the way home from the Burrow while she was in tears?"

"She had to be crying over something else!"

"She wasn't!"

"What's it to you anyway. So what is she cries it shouldn't be your concern!"

"She's my friend, I fucking care about her!"

"So does Harry and he's not in front of my flat snogging my girlfriend!"

"Harry's not in love with her!"

* * *

He hadn't realized he'd said it but when he did it was too late. Ron had heard. Christ all of Hogsmeade had heard. I had heard.

* * *

"You're in love with her?"

"I didn't say that."

"Just answer the fucking question. Are you in love with her?"

* * *

He looked at me for what seemed like forever and then he looked back at Ron and nodded. The silence was deafening but then it was finally broken by one final SMACK!

Ron punched George with all the strength he had left. George staggered and then straightened up. He lifted his fist as if he was going to hit Ron again but then he dropped it. And looked me straight in the eye.

* * *

"It's not worth it. Hermione yes I love you but I can't ruin your's and Ron's lives. Ron deserves you so much more then I do. You deserve him. He's such a better bloke then me."  
_His eyes looked glassy as he paused. He gulped then turned to look at Ron.  
_"She loves you for a reason. You deserve her. I only kissed her because she was upset. I only kissed her because I wished she was mine. Don't be angry with her. She loves you Ron. Just don't hurt her. If you hurt her I will kill you. Just forget I was ever here okay? Just forget everything. I only walked her home. Nothing happened. There was no kiss and no fight. If we can't let this go Christmas is going to be mad. Agreed?"  
_Ron and I nodded.  
_"Right. I'm going home then. I'm sorry I fucked everything up. Goodbye."

* * *

And with that he was gone. Ron and I stood there for what felt like hours. My mouth kept opening and closing and I could tell he was thinking up something to say. I should have said something. I kissed George he didn't kiss me. I should have said that. It's my fault they had a row. Everything is all my fault. I couldn't stay there anymore.

* * *

"Ron, I'm going to stay with my parents for a day or two. I just need to sort things out."

* * *

I Apparated into our flat, got a few things, went back outside to where he was sitting on the steps. I kissed him on the cheek, told him I loved him and with a pop I was standing in front of my parents house in uncontrollable tears. I ruined everything.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	22. Chapter TwentyTwo: Planning Out Our Perf...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Planning out our perfect lives" is all Sum41, not me.**

**Author's Note: First as always thanks to everyone who reads this and everyone who reviews. A special thanks and congratulations to** **Sabrina for being my 100th reviewer. Thats so rad, thanks so much. I would also like to state that boys are horrid and I've been seriously considering becoming a nun (not really, but the thought has crossed my mind). I also reread a few chapters and realized the poor Hermione switchs her feelings almost every chapter. She goes back and forth. I do that because I honestly think that's how girls are. We are very fickle. Well Enjoi!**

**P.S. I have a little self promotion. I have just posted two new stories you should check out. "Even Bad Wolves Can Be Good" and "Ruining Our Friendships". Check them out if you so please. I would love it.**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twenty-Two: Planning Out Our Perfect Lives**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I used to frown about thoughts about kids and marriage."-Millencolin_

Well I can't believe I ruined it. I ruin everything. I've been at my parents for the past two days. I still don't know what I'm going to do. George sent me an owl at work yesterday apologizing for embarrassing me. He also reassured me that none of it was my fault and that he was planning on kissing me anyway, I just beat him to it. That made me laugh a little bit. I better go, my mother's calling me.

Well I just packed up my things from my parents and tomorrow I'm going back to Hogsmeade, back to our flat. Here's what happened.

My mother called me downstairs and there standing in the door way was Ron. He had come to talk. We went into my kitchen and sat down at the table.

* * *

"Hermione. I understand that you have feelings for George."  
_I tried to interrupt but he kept going.  
_"I also am very aware of George's feelings for you as he did make them quiet clear. I went to his flat yesterday and had a long talk with him. No we did not fight. We talked. He told me he sent you an owl. He also told me that you deserve so much more then two stupid brothers fighting over you. He sent me here today. To be honest I was afraid of coming. He told me to come and talk to you; to work things out. He told me to come get you and make it right again. I realize that I am never home, and I discussed this with my boss. Between he and I we are going to work out a less sporadic and less unsystematic schedule for myself because a lot of my work can infact be done at home. It's the secrey that keeps it in the office. I also realize that you and I argue like mad. There's nothing we can really do about that. We're both extremely stubborn but if we try hard enough we can work on it. We really can. The point is Hermione, I do in fact love you very much. I've been so lonely without you but I also want you to be happy. As much as I don't want to say it if you're not happy with me I want you to be happy with someone else. Even if it's George. But I'm going to ask anyway. Hermione will you please consider coming home?"

* * *

I was crying by that point. Silent tears were streaming down my cheeks. George told Ron to come and get me. Ron is lonely with out me. They both love me. My head was swimming. I did the only thing I could do. I grabbed him and kissed him as if my life depended on it. It was a wet, salty kiss. Probably like Cho and Harry's kiss, I imagine. But it was nice because he kissed back. And then we just held on to each other. Not really hugging but not letting go either. I'm going home tomorrow. I'm going home to a boy who loves me. I'm going home to a new start. Tomorrow November 3rd we restart our relationship.

Well it was rocky but we did it. It's about the end of November now. There's maybe two or three more days until December. He did, as promised, attempt to work at home. It only worked for about two weeks. I am just doing to have to compromise for once and understand that his job requires him to be available at all times. He did however, get new hours and that's been very nice. I too have been trying to be less stubborn. That's the challenge but I should get an A for effort. Mrs. Weasley has already sent of the Christmas guest expectations if you will. I'm going to spend it with my parents. I still don't think I could face George. God only knows what I'd do. God only knows what Ron would do. God only knows what George would do. And personally I don't even want to think about it.

On a lighter note work has been wondrous. I've been doing amazing interviews. I got to talk to Oliver Wood just the other day because Puddlemere United is doing much better then anyone expected. There's even speculation that he might be picked for England's team. It's a very rags to riches story; reserve player goes national. Needless to say Oliver's ecstatic. The Prophet was so impressed by my interview I was asked to interview Krum of all people. I talked them out of it. Just say you dated the interviewee and they're calling up other people in a snap.

December is here. It's been about two weeks since my last entry. I was laying in bed last night curled up in Ron's arms and I started thinking. Do you think Ron and I will get married? First let me say there's been no hints or anything the thought just popped into my head. I remember in my last three years at Hogwarts I would send my mother countless letters about Ron. Her and I made a bet once. She still to this day believes that we will get married. She told me that as soon as she met Ron in our second year she knew there was just something about him. Some sign was going off in her head pointing towards me, Ron, and marriage. That would be so bizarre; if we got married. Honestly I never even thought we'd date; so marriage just seems alternate universe surreal. I don't even know why I'm thinking about it. We're no where near marriage. Sure we live together, and I love him, and he loves me but I can tell you now I won't be picking out shades of white anytime soon. Come to think of it I don't even think I'm the marrying type. You know what I mean? I just don't think I'd be able to do that but I never thought I'd be able to be the witch I am today. Sometimes life surprises us; it all depends on how well we take our surprises.

I woke up on Saturday morning to the smell of bacon, a rarity in our household, believe me. I got up and pulled on a sweatshirt and some slippers then wandered into the kitchen. There was Ron, Suzie fucking homemaker, making bacon, eggs, and coffee.

* * *

"Morning sunshine."

"What are you on today?

"You really are a morning person aren't you Hermione?"

"Hahaha. No. I'm just in awe. I never expected to wake up to an absolutely adorable boy making bacon and coffee ever."

_He handed me a cup.  
_"Well I got an owl this morning that said they didn't need me today and I really wanted some bacon."

"Well that explains loads."  
_I took a piece of bacon and ate it.  
_"Good stuff you got there kiddo."

"Thank you. You have any plans for today?"

"Not that I know of."

"Well what do you say we walk around the village?"

"I like that idea. I think today's a Hogwarts visit too."

"We might see Ginny."

"Well I'm gonna go take a shower and get dressed. You enjoy your bacon."

"Enjoy your shower."  
_He winked._

"Ronald Billius Weasley!"

"You really sound like my mother sometimes."

* * *

We headed into Hogsmeade. It was a lovely December day; blustery, flurries every so often, cold. My kind of weather. I wrapped myself up in a jumper and scarf and took a little cup of coffee with me. We went into all the old places that I hadn't been to in atleast a year; even though we live in the village. I even went into Zonko's. Their business seemed to be waning a little. Those Weasley twins are giving them a run for their money. We had just left the Three Broomsticks and were heading towards Honeydukes when we spotted Ginny and…. I tried to distract Ron so he wouldn't see them. That way we could get away quickly with out even being noticed.

* * *

"Oh look Hermione there's Ginny and…"  
_He paused.  
_"George."

_Too late.  
_"Ron, Hermione! I haven't seen you in ages."  
_Ginny ran up and hugged Ron and I. George walked behind her._

"Hey George."  
_I was trying to play it cool._

"Hi Ron; Hermione."

_I think Ginny sensed something. She talked pretty fast.  
_"What are two guys doing today?"

"Nothing really…"

"Ron and I just wanted to get out of the flat for a while."

"You didn't have to work today, then?"  
_He was fidgeting._

"No."

"Well that's good."  
_Ginny looked almost uncomfortable.  
_"Well we really would love to stay and chat but George here has a date."

"Do you?"  
_Ron and I said at the same time._

"Ye…Yeah."

_Ginny just kept going.  
_"George and Fiona have been seeing each other for a while now."

"Fiona? Hogsmeade Fiona?"

_He blushed at my question.  
_"Yeah that Fiona. For about a month in a half."

"Right well we better let you go then. Have fun George. Bye Ginny. Come on Hermione lets go look in Honeydukes. It's getting kinda cold."

"Right Bye Gin, Bye George."

"Bye."

* * *

When I turned around to wave they were already gone. So George has been seeing Fiona for a month and a half. Interesting. But I shouldn't care. Ron isn't seeing Fiona so it shouldn't concern me. Ron is seeing me, and I'm seeing Ron that's all that matters. I love Ron.

* * *

_He waved his hand in front of me.  
_"Hullo. Hermione?"

_I jumped.  
_"Huh what?"

"You okay? You were spacing out for a minute there."

"Oh yeah sorry, just thinking about this story I'm writing for work."

"I'm just gonna get these Chocolate Frogs then we can head on home if you want."

"Oh okay. Take your time."

* * *

He still gets excited when he buys his Chocolate Frogs. He still acts like a little boy sometime. He's gonna be a good dad. Wow first it was marriage now it's kids. I'm still not even sure if either are for me. Who knows? Only time will tell.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	23. Chapter TwentyThree: Martini Kisses

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "Martini Kisses" is all Senses Fail, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews it truly means a lot. I wanted to give you all a heads up that this story is coming to an end. There should only be two or three more chapters. I am however, definatly going to write a sequal although it won't be nearly as long as this. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twenty-Three: Martini Kisses**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I can't see straight but the two of you looks awfully pretty; you're fucking beautiful."-Alkaline Trio_

Well today at work I got a very unexpected surprise. I was asked into my boss's office for a chat. She told me that I am such a skilled writer that I have been offered a permanent writing position in New York!! That's right New York! It's a real writing job too. My editor was so impressed with my writing that she sent my stories out and now I've been offered something I could only dream about.

I'm not sure whether to accept it or not though. I would miss England far too much. I would miss my parents, my friends, everyone. I talked to my mother about it and she reckons I shouldn't give up on it so fast. I have everything I need right here, though. The only way I would accept is if for some unusual reason I couldn't stay here anymore.

Well I knew it was too good to be true. Too damn good. It's only been a month since we "worked everything out" and now it's shite again. I can home from work today to find Ron already there. As I looked around the flat I noticed it seemed almost empty and then I saw the suitcase that was sitting next to him.

* * *

"Hermione we need to talk."  
_Famous last words._

"Obviously. What is it?"  
_I tried really hard to stop my voice from shaking._

"I got promoted at the Ministry."

"That's wonderful!"

"Not really. I'm being sent away on a secret mission for a while."

"When are you leaving?"

"Less then a month."

"For how long?"

"It could be up to a year."

"You'll be able to visit right?"

"No. It's not that easy."  
_He sighed.  
_"It's top secret research and I won't be able to owl anyone or leave really."

"I'll wait for you."

"I don't want you to."

"What?"  
_I was determined to continue playing stupid and not cry._

"I think we should stop seeing each other."  
_He gestured towards the suitcase.  
_"I'm moving out and back to the Burrow."

"I don't understand."

"I don't want to leave with any attachments and I don't want anyone, like you, to be held back by them either."

"That is the biggest pile of rubbish."

"It's the truth Hermione."

"Well then go. Leave. Go on. We're done."

"Hermione don't be angry."

"I'm not angry just leave. I don't want to argue I just want you to go."

* * *

He gathered his trunk and with a pop was gone. I sat down on the cold, hard kitchen floor and cried once again. I needed to get out of the flat and I knew just where to go.

The Hogs Head was pretty empty. I took a seat at the bar and ordered a bottle of fire whiskey. The bartender was hesitant at first but then he gave in. He was handing me a glass when I heard the door open. I glanced behind me and saw him unwrapping his scarf.

* * *

"George?"

_He jumped at being a dressed._ _Then walked over and sat next to me.  
_"Hermione? What are you doing here?"

"Getting pissed."  
_I held up the bottle._

"Yourself?"

"Had the same idea. Do you mind?"  
_I shook my head.  
__The bartender handed him a glass and he poured himself some whiskey.  
_"May I ask why you're getting pissed?"

"No. I don't feel like talking about it."

"Fair enough."

"Why are you getting pissed."

"Fiona broke up with me when I got home from work. Told me she only liked me cause she thought I was handsome or some shit like that."

"I'm sorry George."

"It happens. I'm just not too good with rejection."

"Likewise."

* * *

We clinked our glasses as if they were a doorway into a new existence. We watched the empty bar slowly fill up as the bottle slowly emptied. I'm not a very big drinker so my goal was achieved halfway through the bottle but I helped George finish it. I helped him finish another one too. We were finally escorted out of the Hogs Head hours later. I couldn't even see straight but somehow I managed to remain in a vertical stance.

* * *

_I looked over at George and Fred?  
_"Fred where'd you come from?"

_His laughted turned into a hiccup.  
_"Where's Fred?"

"There right next to you."

"It's only George Hermione."

"How come there are two of you then?"

"I should be asking you the same thing."  
_I tripped and fell into him.  
_"Perhaps---"  
_He hiccupped.  
_"We should get you home."

"If we can find it."

* * *

We pratically carried each other down the narrow streets to my flat. It felt like lightyears. It took even longer to find my keys. When we walked into the flat I was immediately greeted by the strong urge to vomit. I raced to the bathroom with George behind me. My urge was met and as George held my hair back the fire whiskey burned my throat once again. He walked me back into the living room and sat next to me on the sofa. I propped my head on his shoulder while his head rested on mine.

* * *

"I threw up didn't I?"

"That you did. Are you all right?"

"I will be, eventually. Where'd Fred go?"

_He laughed.  
_"No idea."

"Hey you drank more then me how come you're not doubled over moaning and wailing?"

"I can stomach my liquor thanks."

"That was a cheap shot."

"I know."

"That's the catch with fire whiskey isn't it?"  
_I slurred._

"What's the catch?"

"The longer it's in your system, the more pissed you become."

"Right you are. Don't know why I couldn't come up with something like that."

"You don't have to stay here. You can go home if you like."

"I was gonna wait for Ron. I didn't want to leave you. Plus I think I forgot where I live."

"Ron's not coming home."

"What?!?!?!?"

"He moved out this afternoon. Right after I got home from work."  
_The tears started again._

"That explains the fire whiskey then."

"Yup."

"Why'd he move out?"

* * *

It took me almost forty five minutes to tell the whole story between the slurs and sobs. George just held me and reassured me that it would be okay between his own slurs. He held me long after I had finished. It was quite for sometime before I spoke again.

* * *

"Do you really love me?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You know exactly--"  
_Hiccup.  
_"What I'm talking about."

"Yes."  
_He whispered/mumbled/slurred._

_I looked up at him_.  
"Me too."

"What?"

"I love you too."

"No you don't. You love Ron. You're just saying that."

"I'm serious George."

"No you're not. You love Ro--"  
_I kissed him. He pulled away.  
_"Don't do that Hermione."

"Why not?"

"Because you're pissed and you'll regret it when you're sober."

"I didn't regret it the last time."

"You know you did."

"How do you know I didn't?"

"Because I do."

"Kiss me."

"No."

"Then I'll kiss you."

"No you won't."

"Try me."

"You don't know what you're saying."

"I know damn well just what I'm saying."

"No you do---"

* * *

I kissed him again and to my surprise he kissed back. He tasted like fire whiskey and a cherry lollipop. We didn't stop. We just kept going. It only took a short amount of time for the kisses to grow more passionate, more urgent. Before I knew it I was laying on my bed and he was on top of me. Then my head started spinning. Everything was blurring. That's the last thing I seemed to notice.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	24. TwentyFour: I Smell Sex And Candy Here

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "I smell sex and candy here" is all Marcy's Playground, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews I appreciate it immensely. Well Enjoi!**

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twenty-Four: I Smell Sex and Candy Here**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I'm in love with the world through the eyes of a girl whose still around the morning after."-Elliott Smith_

I woke up with a start and a violent headache. I had the strangest dream. Ron broke up with me, I went to some bar, got drunk, and shagged George. It seemed so real but I know it wasn't because I can feel Ron sleeping with his arm around me. He burrowed his head into my neck and grunted in his sleep. Ron doesn't burrow and Ron certainly doesn't grunt. I glanced over at the arm that was laying across my stomach. Ron's arms have more freckles and Ron's arms certainly aren't that muscular. I didn't want to turn around. I knew it was Ron. It had to be. It couldn't be anyone else. It couldn't!

* * *

"Ron…"  
_I whispered.  
_"Ron wake up!"  
_Just a little louder.  
_"RON!"

* * *

I felt his mouth moving and his hot breath on my neck. His response was a soft low whisper. If I hadn't been hypervenalating I probably would have found it hot.

* * *

"It's George thanks."

* * *

I fell out of my bed with a thud; waking George fully up. I grabbed a sheet and wrapped it around myself as quickly as I could. He finally opened his eyes and sat up a little with his mouth hanging open. His hair was a mess and his eyes looked glossy. Not sad glossy as if he'd been crying. Glossy like he'd just had the best shag of his life. He tugged his sheet up a little more.

* * *

_He still felt the need to whisper.  
_"We need to talk."

_I nodded.  
_"But let's get dressed first."

* * *

He got off the bed and made sure the sheet was securely tied to his waist as he walked around the room looking for his clothes. His sweater was on my dresser. His t-shirt hanging off a chair. His jeans in a pile by the closet. Incedently my knickers had landed right on top. His cheeks reddened a little when he had to lift them off. Lastly his boxers were in the doorway leading from the living room. I waited until he was in the bathroom to even remove myself from the floor. I was in the kitchen making coffee when I heard the bathroom door open.

* * *

"Hermione? Can I come out now?"

_I couldn't help but giggle.  
_"I'm in the kitchen."

* * *

He walked in and sat down at the table while I handed him a cup of coffee. Almost immediately he began rambling.

* * *

"Hermione I'm sorry. I don't know what got into me. One minute we were talking and then next we were… um… "

"George. Stop. Calm down. We're adults. We can handle this calmly. Let's just get the basic facts down."  
_He nodded.  
_"First question did we really shag?"

"Three times."  
_He mumbled._

"What I couldn't hear you?"

"Three… three times. We shagged three times."

"Oh."  
_I was flustered.  
_"How do you know? I don't remember anything."

_His whole face was bright red by this point.  
_"Go look in the rubbish bin in your bathroom."

* * *

I apprehensively got up and walked into the bathroom. Upon pearing into the rubbish bin I found his source of information. Three very used condoms. Mother fucker it was going from bad to worse. With a quick swish of my wand they had disappeared. I waited for the redness in my cheeks to go down before I walked back into the kitchen.

* * *

"Right well do you remember anything?'

"Not really."

"Well then how do we know we even did it?'

"Believe me Hermione; I know."  
_If possible he turned redder._

"Right well. No one else needs to know do they?"

"Right only we know and we don't even remember. It's easy enough to forget."

"Nothing happened."

"Yup nothing happened. We didn't shag. Not one bit."

"George."

"Right sorry."

* * *

Just then there was a pop that made George and I both jump. There right in front of us was Ron looking very confused.

* * *

"George? What are you doing here?"

"Uh, ah… um."  
_I thought we were finished for sure.  
_"I stopped by to talk to you."

"What?"  
_Ron and I said in unison._

"Yeah I wanted to ask you something about a Ministry regulation and Hermione said you weren't home. She ah… she offered me some coffee and I was just telling her my girl troubles."

_I caught on.  
_"Yeah George and I have just been chatting away."

"You okay George? You look a little disheveled."

"What do you mean?"

"Well. You look like you've had quiet a night."

* * *

When did he get so damn observant? It was hard to miss though. George's eyes still looked glossy and he had a glow about him. His hair was still tousled and all his clothes were overly wrinkled. There was no avoiding it. George looked like sex. I just hope they weren't thinking the same thing about me.

* * *

_George nervously chuckled.  
_"Right well I'd love to stay and chat but I have to open the store this morning. Thanks for the talk and coffee Hermione. I'll see you two later."  
_He was gone._

"He seemed a little odd didn't he?"

"When does he ever seem normal?"

"Good point."

"So why are you here?"

"I wanted to apologize. I'm still staying at the Burrow but I wanted to apologize for leaving so abruptly. I should have told you sooner. I love you Hermione."

"Thank you."

* * *

I should have said I love you back. So why did I say thank you? Because during his miniture speech my mind wandered and I started recalling the night before. I was remembering things I didn't remember when I woke up. I could feel my cheeks growing hotter at the mere thought. Thankfully Ron didn't notice.

* * *

"I just wanted to stop by and say that before I went to work. I really have to go now though."

_I caught my breath just in time.  
_"Well thank you. I appreciate it."

"I'm off then."

"Bye."

* * *

As soon as I heard the pop I practically raced to my shower. I turned the cold water on full blast and tried to wash away everything that was flooding my memory. The colder the water got to worse my thoughts became.

I shagged George. I shagged George three times. I shagged George three times and from what I can remember it was great. I was really trying just to erase it from my memory but the image of him with a sheet wrapped around himself walking around my bedroom just wouldn't get out of my head. Wow.

But Ron loves me. He loves me. But so does George. It's cut and dry; plain and simple. They both love me. And I love them both. But why? Why can't I just be in love with the whole world. That would make it simple. No instead I'm in love with two boys; two brothers and I don't know why.

* * *

**--UnreadLetters**


	25. Chapter TwentyFive: I Don't Want You To ...

**Disclaimer: The only thing I own is the plot, that's all mine. Everything else belongs to a brilliant woman named J.K. Rowling. "I don't want you to love me anymore" is all The Early November, not me.**

**Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews I appreciate it with all my heart. This is it kids, the last chapter. I know it's sad isn't it. My story is coming to an end. Well not really. If you just take a gander at the Author's note at the end you'll see what I'm talking about. Well Enjoi!**

**P.S. ronlover05 wondered if I read my reviews and I just wanted to let him or her know that I read everyone I receive although I can't personally reply to them all because I'm a lazy sod.**

**P.P.S. Sorry about the shortness in the chapters by the way but I stop them where I see fit. **

**All I Can Really Do**

**Chapter Twenty-Five: I Don't Want You To Love Me Anymore**

**By: UnreadLetters**

"_I'm feeling more alone then I ever have before.."-Ben Folds Five_

I honestly don't know what's going on anymore. I don't even know if Ron and I are together. All I know is that I've got a bad case of the flu, I'm living in a falt by myself, Ron leaves in a month, and everything's weird.

I went to dinner at the Burrow a few days ago. Ron wouldn't let go of my hand the whole time. It was getting kind of annoying. And then there was George. I didn't think it was possible for a Weasley twin to look so sullen and melancholy. I'm ruining their lives. I've made Ron much more domineering then he already was and I've made George depressed. I'm destroying them.

My boss asked me about New York again. Everyone I work with really feels I should take it and well I do too so I accepted. I need to get away. Who knows how long I'll be there and I can always come back. It's only a plane ride across the ocean. That's not even the hard part; no the hard part is telling everyone I'm going. I just don't know how. There's another family dinner at the Burrow next week. That'll be the perfect opportunity. I'm scheduled to leave two days after that.

I've already had people come and look at the flat. I discussed the whole thing with my parents and they both are extremely supportive. My mother even said that my going away will be better for _everyone_. I do too.

I want to tell Ron before I tell everyone else. He has a right to know first but he's going to be so busy that I don't think I'll be able to. I told Harry though. He promised to keep his mouth shut and not tell anyone. He was angry when I first told him but became more supportive when I gave him all the details. The big day is getting closer and closer but I still have no idea how I'm going to tell them. Maybe I'll wing it.

I waited until dinner was over to break the news to everyone. I planned on doing so right before I left so I could make a clean get away. Mrs. Weasley's emotions alone are enough to make a person apprehensive. Times that by nine. After dinner everyone went into the living room to talk as usual and that's where I told Mrs. Weasley I has some news. She quieted everyone for me as I dropped the bomb.

* * *

"I've been offered a job in New York and I've accepted."

* * *

I grimaced awaiting their reactions. There was an inept pause and then they started. Ginny and Mrs. Weasley both started crying but swore they were _happy tears_. Everyone else basically wished me congratulations, said they'd miss me, but were in general happy for me. George and Ron however didn't seem to feel the same way. Both picked different corners of the room to sulk while brushing off anyone who asked what was wrong.

About fifteen minutes later I said goodbye to everyone and hugged a very brooding Ron. I was once again towards the end of the lane when I heard my name being called. It was snowing and the snowflakes were sticking to my eyelashes but not in the good _Sound of Music_ way. The snow was starting to vex me just like holding Ron's hand. I heard my name again but coming from a very different voice. I finally turned and saw both Ron and George walking over to me.

* * *

_Ron spoke first.  
_"How come you didn't tell me? I should have known."

"You're right you should have I just didn't get a chance because you were so busy and I wanted to tell you in person."  
_George had his hand in his pockets and was shuffling the snow with his feet.  
__Ron looked over at him.  
_"George go back in the house."

"No. I need to talk to Hermione."

"Well I do too. Let me once again remind you that she is my girlfriend."

"I am not your girlfriend and I haven't been for two weeks. Let me remind you that we did not get back together."

"Fine, you're not my girlfriend but I still have more of a right to be out here then he does."

_I was trying really hard to control my temper.  
_"Where is that relevant in this discussion?"

"It just is."

"Well Ron if you're going to be like that George has just as much of a right to be here as you do."

_Ron snorted to himself.  
_"All because he loves you."

"Yes."

_Once again Ron looked at George.  
_"You don't love her. And even if you did I love her more."

_I could see George's temper rising.  
_"No you don't. You think so but you don't."

"Because you have such a reason to love her don't you?"

"It's a better reason then yours."

"You know what George this is between Hermione and me just stay out of it!"

"JESUS CHRIST WOULD YOU TWO STOP IT!?!? You should hear yourselves. You're acting like children fighting over a toy. I'M NOT A TOY GODDAMNIT!"  
_I paused and caught my breath.  
_"Now I'm going to give you all the explanation you need but first you need to do something for me. Shut up. And if either one of you puts a hand on the other I'm leaving. Is that copasetic?  
_They nodded.  
_"Here goes nothing. I love you both very much. You're amazing guys; you truly are. But I can't do this anymore. We all made amazing friends and we should have left it that way. I'm destroying the both of you and your relationships with each other. I'm pulling you apart and I can't keep doing it. I'm leaving in two days and I know it's for the better. I want both of you to forget about me. Find amazing girls who love you so much more then I can, get married, have tons of little red haired brats, and don't ever think of me again. In two days I'm not only leaving England and the people I love; I'm leaving your minds. I love you both with all my heart but I don't want you to love me anymore."

* * *

They tried to argue but I wouldn't let them. I hugged them both ; not really wanting to let go. I squeezed Ron's hand one last time and brushed the strand of hair out of George's eyes. Then I Apparated away and I left them staring blank faced in the snow.

Harry, Ginny, and my parents took me to the train station so I could take a train to the airport. I didn't want anyone else to come. I was planning on it only being my parents but my father thought it would do me some good to have a friend or two see me off. I don't do well with goodbyes. I had enough trouble letting go of those four I don't think I would leave if I had to hug anyone else goodbye.

I'm going to miss everything so much. No more Hogwarts, or Diagon Alley. No more Hogsmeade and dinners at the Burrow. No more boy talks with my mother or morning coffee with my father. No more Big Ben or Buckingham Palace. No more friends. I'm so alone.

I am trying to be positive I really am. I should have never accepted the job. Oh who am I kidding yes I should have. I did the right thing. I'm leaving; yes, but for a good reason. I'm starting a new life.

I'm sitting in the waiting room of a New York hospital. It's set up a lot like St. Mungo's except different talking paintings line the hallways. It's been three weeks since I left London and everything behind. Actually I'm adjusting really well. Everything has been pretty great so far. So I guess you're wondering why I'm in a hospital huh? I can't seem to get rid of this flu I have. I feel sick and off key all the time. I finally went and got myself checked out now I'm just waiting for my Healer to tell me the test results.

* * *

"Ms. Granger we have your results."

"How does it look?"

"If you'd just step into my office we can discuss them more thoroughly."

"Are they really bad?"

_He chuckled.  
_"No not at all. Ms. Granger you're perfectly healthy."

"I am?"

"Oh yes, quiet."

"Then what's wrong with me?"

"You're pregnant."

"Preg… preg… PREGNANT?!?!?!?!?!?!"  
_He nodded.  
_"But I can't be. Are you sure they're right?"

"I rechecked the results three times. There's no getting around it."

* * *

I sat in shock for what felt like days. Pregnant? No that's impossible. I can't be. That just doesn't make sense. But… no, no, no it's just not probable. I wouldn't even know who the father is. That sounds horrible. Is it Ron or George? I'm beginning to think Rita Skeeter got it right all those years ago. Maybe I am the _scarlet woman_ she pegged me for.

This can't be happening. I'm only eighteen years old. No! Maybe it's god's baby. Maybe I'll have a dream tonight and some heavenly being will tell me I'm pregnant with the second coming. It'll be Christmas all over again. That makes more sense then the reality of the whole situation but here I am a head full of knowledge and I didn't even know I was pregnant to begin with and now I think it's the second coming. I just looked at the results the Healer gave me. Bloody hell; I am pregnant.

* * *

**The End**

**--UnreadLetters**

**Yeah so that's the end. I know I left you all hanging. That is why I wrote the sequel _Airbrushed Memories._Which I have posted Please read that. It should be listed along with my other stories. It's going to be a few chapters long but no where near the length of this. **

**Thanks to everyone who read this. I'm so glad so many of you liked it.**


End file.
